I'm such a miserable old cow

[witchyhills]

dh just sent me some flowers, to say thank you for being the best mummy in the world.
We had some bad news from fertility clinic yesterday, and I'm really upset

They are horrible
I hate chrysanthemums, and I hate orange and yellow

Poor dh can't do anything right

And I can't stop crying

I hate chrysanthemums too. But you know your DH was trying to do a nice thing - I'm so sorry you've had bad news.

Didn't want to read and run. So sorry about your bad news. It's natural to be upset. Could you talk to your DH about how you are feeling?

I suspect if DH had sent you the best bouquet delievered by your naked celeb of choice with a promise of a fortnight on a desert island with your every whim catered for you would still have felt like shit .
try not to be too hard on yourself you are having a hard time so cut yourself some slack.

but dont tell him you hate the flowers!!
Poor guy.

I got nowt from mine, come to think of it i got nowt from any bugger.
I hate everything at the mo too becuase my oven is broken, so i can relate. Its shite ist it, you cry if you want, here you go

I won't tell him I don't like them
I'm sure he didn't specify what type of flowers
He's hurting too, he is really trying, hes being sweet, but it's my fault, my useless old body
I didn't think I would feel like this, I feel completely useless and pointless. And every time I think of DS not having a brother or sister I just want to curl up in a ball
Doesn't help that the house is a tip

Sod the house (that's my personal motto )
Just be kind to yourself today.

I have an only as I was told not to have any more. It really isn't the end of the world, although it feels like it at the time. Both my parents were onlies, so to me it isn't odd.

What have the fertiltiy clinic said? (if you dont mind us asking)

What scary said x

Poor you. I too hate chrysanthamums. When I had PND and was at my lowest ebb, DH bought me some. I sobbed for about 3 hours because he had bought me flowers I hated. He knows I don't like them, but he bought them from DS as they were labelled "Mums" at the flower shop and he wanted me to know that DS loved me really. He was in his colic phase and I wanted to take him back to the hospital.

Just think about the meaning behind the flowers, rather than the flowers themselves. In the 6 years since the "mums" incident, he has only bought me one lot of flowers - red roses at valentines as they were "safe" in his words. I think I traumatised him more than I did myself.

Oh, and sod the house like zippa says ...

awww, poor you

and what zippy said

...thinking about it- I'm sure noone will be unkind, but...do you think it might be more helpful to you if you post somewhere other than AIBU?

xxx

My deep sympathy, been there with DW (but DC now adult!) and niece there now. And bugger the tip. All the best to you.

Oh I don't think being an only child is so bad, although dh is an only and has some very selfish traits, coincidence I'm sure,

Fertility clinic - all very confusing and lots of unanswered questions, but basically, amh of 0.48, so not holding out much hope. Maybe a miracle
I just wish we had started the investigations earlier or I wish we'd met each other earlier.
I need to concentrate on how lucky we are to have DS.

I

Ahh witchy, i can SO empathise, you sound like me!! really you do.
I think i may be a year or two ahead of you and have now found some smeblance of peace and acceptance of the inevitable awful fact that we will not have any more children.
We have ds, who is now 8, i have just turned 41 and only began investigations about 2 years ago following loads of miscarriages.
We were told in July after mc number 6, that we are going to continue to have mcs...but they dont know why, there are no further tests that they can offer, no treatements and to go home and make a decision.
I wish we had tried years before, i wish i had pushed for investigations years before.

sincere sympathies my lovely.

witchy, it took us a long time to get dd2, there is ten years between our two dd. It sounds like a very hard time for you at the moment, keep positive. xx

witchyhills- Hope you are ok. Ive been in your shoes and its not nice. Take care xx

thanks all
feel a bit better, tidied up the house
it's spick and span, and kept my mind off things for a while