to be outrageously jealous of dds gps?

[pregnantpause]

I love my ILs, as do my dc. They care for my dc two days a week, for free. On these days they spoil them rotten. Sweets, toys, no tidying after themselves, no bedtime. They never say no. But they adore my dc, and (this is where my problem lies) my. Dc adore them.

Dd1 always asks to see them/phone them when shes with me. She Does crafts in school, and brings them home and Im told that the picture/model/card is for gp Not for me.

Im jealous and feel that she loves them more than she loves me, and i dont know that Its just because i make her eat properly, and pur things away and generally disipline her, or if Its because she just feels they are better than me. Aibu to be jealous when really i should be grateful that the dc have so many people to love?

I think in your shoes, I'd be feeling pretty upset too.
Whilst I'm sure your DC love you very much, it would be nice to sometimes feel that you are no.1 wouldn't it?
Are you happy with the way that your IL's are looking after the kids? Would they be receptive to maybe introducing a bit more discipline - perhaps a bit of tidying up etc? Maybe from an angle of helping your DC's with their 'life skills' i.e. it's a good thing for them to do some of these things for themselves.

YABU to be jealous. But you know that. Your children will grow up to have all kinds of heroes, friends, role-models, romances and people they generally love and admire. But you'll always be their mum and, whatever relationships they have besides, that's unique.

you know YABU don't you?

same as i do when my kids spend their time talking about daddies house when with me :( but daddy never says no (has them for 48 hrs every 2 weeks and not a minute more) so they will

it hurts but you know they love you, try not to get upset xxxx

Beamur- they wont. I have tried to stress that as they have them so often they shouldnt spoil them quite so much- especially re sweets biscuits and ice cream. But they say that they will do it my way and then continue on regardless. But beggars Cant be choosers, and What they do provide in terms of love consistency and security outweighs any negatives.

I just want a painting for ME (stampa feet in toddleresque stylee)

No-one became a mother in order to receive thanks... If you'd like a painting for you, why not ask for one?

i only really appreciated my parents when i'd grown up and left home i felt a bit like this seeing my kids trip over themselves to go see dh and gp's then shout 'bye mummy' everytime i go near the front door without batting an eyelid.

i do put my foot down about tidying up though - my kids are only small but i'm trying to teach them some responsibility so if they make a mess, they have to help tidy up (even if they're just watching me do it!). i do make a point to GP's that this is a very important part of my parenting and i expect them to do it anywhere. i don't want them to go through life thinking everyone else will tidy up after them.
snacks and treats is also fine until they stop eating their main meals!

The relationship between gps and gc is really special and they are lucky to have it. However I do see where you are coming from, my dd went on a holiday with friends this year, and brought back a little gift for her gm (my mil) but just choc from the airport for me and dh! I did feel a bit

It's normal when they are preschool no?

Dsister called her childminder mum for awhile. Not sure mum ever got over that :)