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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU RE: Christmas and DS1

45 replies

LadyEvenstarsCoven · 30/10/2011 12:06

Ok DS1 wants his bedroom done for christmas new bed the lot.

So I have made this suggestion which my mum thinks is me BU.

DS1 gets my double bed
so I save money there, with the money I save I will buy him a
New TV,
double bedding
new quilt
tv wall bracket
the wall decal he has been eying up on ebay
new furniture chest of drawers, book shelf etc
and get freeview in his bedroom.

My mum thinks it is U of me to give him my bed as it is second hand.

OP posts:
Original poster
LadyEvenstarsCoven · 30/10/2011 12:31

Fabby - I was going to cheat with the tv as well there is a shop close to me which sells recon tv's with dvd etc with an 8m garentee (never can spell that bloody word) But will look on ebay Thanks!!

OP posts:
LesserOfTwoWeevils · 30/10/2011 12:31

YANBU but your mum IBU. It's practically a brand-new bed and your DS is happy with it. Making his room into a cosy den for him is a lovely idea.

FabbyChic · 30/10/2011 12:33

Your Ma could buy him a feather mattress topper! I love them!

Original poster
LadyEvenstarsCoven · 30/10/2011 12:35

Fabby great idea!!

Lesser thankyou.

I just want to make everything perfect for him.

OP posts:
twinklytroll · 30/10/2011 12:35

If my child wanted their whole room decorating as a Christmas present with a whole list of demands about lighting etc I would think they were being unreasonable.

If he needs a bed by all means get one for Christmas with some bedding but I find the idea that children demand such things rather disturbing.

I have nothing against you deciding to do the room, I once completely redid my daughters room as a surprise while she was staying with her father but it was not in response to her demands.

BluddyMoFo · 30/10/2011 12:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ben10WasTheSpawnNowWeLoveLego · 30/10/2011 12:39

Love the decal Grin I bought DS (only 6) a spiderman one from ebay and it looks fantastic. Do what you want. Sounds great.

There is this that I have been recommended for DS who is also suspected of being on spectrum. Might be calming for him and is a bargain IMO.

Original poster
LadyEvenstarsCoven · 30/10/2011 12:39

Twinkly, he hasn't demanded anything.

He didn't want any of the things suggested for christmas - he has lost interest in everything. I suggested off cuff that if he couldn't decide I'd buy stuff for him I thought he wanted or needed and he said "For my room? that'd be great"

This is a boy who asks for very little in recent times, he isn't a bad boy, doesn't get things through the year other than birthdays etc

OP posts:
BluddyMoFo · 30/10/2011 12:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
LadyEvenstarsCoven · 30/10/2011 12:41

Ben10 - thanks for the link of the light he will love that!!!

OP posts:
Original poster
LadyEvenstarsCoven · 30/10/2011 12:43

Bluddy, I offered him an xbox 360, blackberry, DSi3D - his response

"No mum, I have a great phone enough consoles and already have a DS lite"

He has really changed since we found out - become very quiet and I worry so much about him.

And that Decal is great isn't it!!

OP posts:
twinklytroll · 30/10/2011 12:44

If he hasn't demanded there is not an issue on that score , that was the impression I got.

It is not something I would do but if you are happy and can afford it , it is certainly thoughtful.

My daughter rarely "demands " and if she did it would be ignored.

FabbyChic · 30/10/2011 12:45

Aaawww make a scrap book of the stuff you are going to get so he can keep looking at it, you know like a design sheet like interior designers do!

Great idea he will love it.

Ben10WasTheSpawnNowWeLoveLego · 30/10/2011 12:45

I think that "No mum, I have a great phone enough consoles and already have a DS lite" is a great response.

It must be such a big thing for a 13 yo to process an AS dx. It's not surprised he's a bit shell-shocked.

I think that you sound like you are planning a great Christmas for him.

Flisspaps · 30/10/2011 12:46

Sounds fabulous TLE.

Perhaps you should suggest to your mother that if she doesn't like you giving DS your 1yo bed, then she can either shell out for a brand new one for him, or keep her nose out?

3littlefrogs · 30/10/2011 12:52

I think it sounds a lovely idea. Creating his dream bedroom will last for years and pay dividends. Nothing wrong at all with giving him your bed.

My dc had everything secondhand for years - we couldn't afford anything else!

I am doing up dd's bedroom for her Christmas - she doesn't want anything else, and IMO she deserves it, she works very hard and is not in the least demanding.

Her brothers are doing the painting and decorating, and will paint some second hand furniture, I am buying her a new bed and a rug for the floor.

TLES - I think your mum is being silly!

Original poster
LadyEvenstarsCoven · 30/10/2011 12:55

I am going to be doing up his chest of drawers.
It was second hand 3 yrs ago and a olid piece of furniture. So I am going to sand it down, get silver handles and paint it black. I think I am more excited tbh Grin

OP posts:
3littlefrogs · 30/10/2011 13:00

I love doing up old furniture and other projects like that.

Will he be able to help you? I find it very therapeutic and calming to have a hands on project when I am stressed.

Does he do any painting/drawing/artwork? I framed some of DS1's artwork and have it on my wall - it looks good.

Original poster
LadyEvenstarsCoven · 30/10/2011 13:02

3little sadly he didn't inheret my artistic genes Grin

OP posts:
HauntyMython · 30/10/2011 13:11

If your DS is happy with it - and he clearly is as you said he understands he gets more other stuff this way - your mum is being ridiculous.

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