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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think discussing Christmas with a 3 year old in October is not necessary?

50 replies

ChocolateBiscuitCake · 30/10/2011 07:19

MIL has stayed twice this week and discussed at length at every opportunity Father Christmas and how he leaves presents blah, blah.

He is just 3 (end of sept). It is only October. Not even haloween...
Aibu to think it is a) stupid and b) unnecessary to discuss Christmas. Poor child has no real concept of weeks and months!!! (plus her version of what FC does says is different from 'mine' which really grates!)

So Aibu?

OP posts:

MollyTheMole · 30/10/2011 11:57

oh take the rod out of your arse OP.

gabid · 30/10/2011 11:58

My DCs (6 and just turned 3) are already in the Xmas swing. Its not MIL though, its the 6 year old, so I have given in and got the Xmas CD, DVD and the books out and they are fascinated by everything to do with Xmas. The CD in on non-stop in the car and they are alreading singing the songs. It's embarrassing when they sing it in the street.

On the other hand, they are so interested that they can learn a lot of language (we are bilingual), songs, stories and history etc by tapping into that fascination - I hope it will not run out before the actual event.

Robotindisguise · 30/10/2011 11:59

What does her Father Christmas do that yours doesn't?

BluddyMoFo · 30/10/2011 11:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LadyEvilEyes · 30/10/2011 12:01

I love extremely tacky singing Christmas creatures.

gabid · 30/10/2011 12:08

OP - Could you not have a word with your MIL about the subject and agree on a storyline? Does she just talk about presents? There are lots of other Xmassy things she could be doing, even now to prepare, e.g. arts and crafts, tree decoration or the Xmas story. Would you mind that?

Original poster

ChocolateBiscuitCake · 30/10/2011 12:53

Yes I do mind in October. She is s grown woman and should be able to have some common sense. Chat, tell stories, arts and crafts, cd's and songs visit grottos, pantomimes, singing santas etc in December (end of nov if you have to ). Christmas is not a three mOnth festival!!

OP posts:

southeastastra · 30/10/2011 12:54

my mil does this, she usually starts in august though so i win

ChippingInAutumnLover · 30/10/2011 12:55

Well Chocolate - clearly lots of posters, lots of shops and lots of children think YABU so you might just have to accept it

ShirleyKnot · 30/10/2011 12:57

I can't WAIT until my boys are grown and married with children of their own. Just think of all the angst one can cause by...TALKING about Christmas

I might extend it right out and talk about Easter in February, or about summer holidays in April. REALLY SHAKE THAT SHIT UP.

cantspel · 30/10/2011 13:04

I am going to start stocking up on tacky signing reindeer now so by the time i am a granny i have a good supply ready to start handing out. I might even be really annoying and try to take my grandchildren to be to a tacky panto, fill them up with refined sugars and send them home with light up wands and shouting he's behind you.

Hopefully i will have dil's who dont have cats bum faces and will actively encourage me to enjoy my grandkids

sheeplikessleep · 30/10/2011 13:10

What exactly do you object to ?

That she discusses it this early? That she has a different 'story'? That you want to get your DS excited yourself closer to the time and you feel that your MIL is somehow stepping on your toes?

gabid · 30/10/2011 13:32

OP - still, can you talk to her?

Trills · 30/10/2011 13:32

Getting a 3 year old excited about something 2 months in advance just seems like a recipe for disaster.

valiumredhead · 30/10/2011 13:36

Bah humbug! I think some people would do well to remember that one day we will be MILs!

gabid · 30/10/2011 13:37

Mine do talk about Xmas all year round. In August DS (6) made a Xmas town with houses, cotton wool snow and trees . I decided not to encourage that but I didn't stop him either as he was happy and busy. However, I asked him to take it to his room and not expand the thing all over the kitchen floor.

Sandalwood · 30/10/2011 13:38

There's not a lot of avoiding it though.
Cakes/mincemeat/puddings etc all being made now.
Shopping - tis only 2 paydays left.
Shops, adverts, making things etc etc
They'll be starting to practice the nativity at schools.

usualsuspect · 30/10/2011 13:39

Another moaning about the MIL thread

I really think MIL moaning deserves its own topic

valiumredhead · 30/10/2011 13:39

Ds writes his xmas list at least twice a day

Original poster

ChocolateBiscuitCake · 30/10/2011 14:02

gabid - I could talk to her but I feel like I am jsut telling a 70 year old woman off. It is kind of a respect your elders thing - I just feel really uncomfortable doing it! However, I appreciate it is the adult thing to do! If it were my mother then yes, I would tell her to stop.

shirley - I don't have any issues with Christmas - it is a lovely, special time of year. And of course it needs to be celebrated and young children indulged. I am just dumbfounded that a grown woman thinks that talking about Christmas and presents 2/3 months before it happens isn't stupid. I don't talk about birthdays that far in advance? Do what you want with your future DIL, but perhaps start in December!!!

shhep That she discusses it this early? Yes - that is my biggest issue. I would be delighted for her to discuss to her hearts content in the genuine run up to Christmas.
That she has a different 'story'? probably pissed me off because she had started talking about it! If the 'story' was different in December I wouldn't give a rats arse.
That you want to get your DS excited yourself closer to the time and you feel that your MIL is somehow stepping on your toes? Not really. I just get so fed up of people excusing GP behaviour by saying they are GP and should be able to spoil the GC. As parents, we have a 'right' to indulge our children too. It is not just a GP privilege to do the fun stuff...or at least it shouldn't be IMO.

OP posts:

TethHearseEnd · 30/10/2011 14:09

The evil bitch.

sheeplikessleep · 30/10/2011 19:28

Does it really matter if it is discussed this early? What's the worst that could happen? DS1 has just turned 4 and already talking about his 5th birthday party and getting excited!

I don't think 'fun stuff' is exclusive to anyone is it? I'm sure there will be enough christmas excitement to go around.

PS seriously, if that is all your mil does (maybe there's other stuff we don't know about which might have built up and this instance is the 'final straw'), then YABU.

NinkyNonker · 30/10/2011 19:32

My mum insists of doing a stocking etc for dd, which is very sweet but deep down it bugs me...that is our job, it feels like she is just reliving our childhood through dd, and claiming her, which is silly I know. When she is old enough to understand I think I'll ask that she gets only one stocking and that's ours.

BluddyMoFo · 30/10/2011 19:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheFallenMadonna · 30/10/2011 19:45

Good Lord. Honestly, my MIL and I cordially loathe each other, but I really think you are getting yourself worked up over very little here.

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