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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think that structured dance classes are not suitable for the majority of under 3's

11 replies

FruitChute · 29/10/2011 21:30

DD started going to a dance class for 2/4 yr olds a few weeks ago. She is 4 and absolutely loves it. As do the other 3/4 yr olds who go.
There are, however, a few kids there who have just turned 2 who have spent the most of each session crying. The tutor expects the class to follow instuctions such as making a line or sitting quietly at one end of the room while they each run to the other end in turn. The older kids who are in nursery are happy to do this and get praised for it but the younger ones either look baffled or prefer, quite understandably imo, to run around playing with the props. This results in tears when their parents repeatedly manhandle them to where they should be.
AIBU to think that these classes expect too much of kids who have just turned 2 and that the parents are silly paying for something week on week that their kids clearly hate?

OP posts:

PomBearAtTheGatesOfDoom · 29/10/2011 21:33

They'll be the parents who read threads on forums, and parenting books like that Tiger Mother woman's, about how little Evangeline can do the dying swan at 18 months whilst reciting Proust in Mandarin and accompanying herself on the violin and think that if their child doesn't go to half a dozen classes she'll be psychologically scarred for life and end up like Amy Winehouse
I bet if you heard them over dinner they'd be telling the other parents how well little Chlamydia is doing and how advanced she is too...

Graciescotland · 29/10/2011 21:35

Have they paid for the course and now feel they have to attend to get their monies worth? TBH I think if a class is advertised as suitable for 2+ the tutor should be teaching at their level rather than looking to the parents to intervene.

nailak · 29/10/2011 21:38

we had this in our childrens centre, all kids below nursery age and suppossed to stand in a line then use their elbows and nose to hold a baloon up while skipping across the room and other such nonsense,

we just ended up with random kids doing random things in random places...

Bethshine82 · 29/10/2011 21:39

I think two is a bit little for anything very formal. My son could not even cope with rhythm time, he ran amock and tried to steal the drums off all the other children. We had paid for a term but lasted about three weeks. I felt bad that there were other children and parents there that were trying to join in properly. Also we weren't getting anything from it, DS just wanted interested.
Similarly if we went to a dance class and he was obviously not keen or disruptive or just bewildered I would probably give up. What is the point in forcing your child to do something that makes them miserable and spoils it for those children that want to join in.
So no, YANBU.

squeakyfreakytoy · 29/10/2011 21:41

YANBU, 2 is way too young to be able to properly participate.

Original poster

FruitChute · 29/10/2011 21:41

Well funny you should say that as i took dd to the same class when she was 2 and she hated it then so I didn't take her back. I had paid for 4 sessions but I felt my money would be more wasted by taking her somewhere that would upset her.
I agree that it isn't really suitable for the ages they advertise. And they will take younger than 2 as well because the first week we went I took ds (21 months) because there was no-one else to look after him and they wanted me to sign him up. But there was no way I would have done because he is young for 21 months and I would either have had to let him run around getting in everyones way or become one of the manhandling mummies

OP posts:

Iggly · 29/10/2011 21:42

PMSL at the idea of DS, 2, doing structured dance classes.

That said he does do music classes but they just involve singing and bashing instruments!

cat64 · 29/10/2011 21:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

FruitChute · 29/10/2011 21:49

I totally agree but I also think that the parents - who have been going for weeks before we started - should have realised by now that it's not suitable and stopped going.

OP posts:

BikeRunSki · 29/10/2011 21:50

DS has just started a dance class like the OP describes. He is 3.1, there is no way he would have concentrated on it until a few weeks ago.

Moblem · 29/10/2011 22:04

YABU and YANBU.

I think it depends on the class - and tbh, the way your class is structured does not sound appropriate for two year olds.

When my DD1 was 2 1/2 I took her to a baby ballet class at a 'very good' ballet school. There, the girls were all expected to stand nicely in lines, and 'rock their babies' and point their toes. My daughter lasted one lesson, I took her out at the end and never looked back.

Instead, I took her to another ballet school. The class was also for children 2 1/2 plus, but there were no formal standing in lines, and tbh it was mostly prancing in pink and it was done through stories and imagination with pointing the toes etc thrown in to the story. When both my DDs were in this class, I never saw them in a formal line.

So I agree, that your type of structured ballet sounds inappropriate for 2 year olds, but I know my DDs loved their ballet classes at that age and they went to one where the expectations were much more age appropriate. Perhaps the parents of the two year olds just need to find a better ballet school?

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