Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to make my excuses to the vicar?

9 replies

MyRealName · 26/10/2011 18:32

Bit trivial really, but it's the kind of thing that gets me worrying. DD is 4mths, and has been struggling to shake off a cold (I had it too) for a fortnight now. I keep thinking she is getting better and will have a lovely smiley day, but then wakes up all congested. Anyway, today she had been miserable, increasingly clingy and upset, and has resisted sleep even though she is really tired. Every time I resolve to take her to the doctors, she seems miraculously recovered. Obviously if I thought she was really ill I would seek medical advice immediately, but I really think her snuffles are just making her miserable. I will take her tomorrow to rule out anything else which could be distressing her for my own peace of mind.

Anyway, she is being Christened soon and we are supposed to attend the second of four meetings/lessons with the vicar tonight. This will mean leaving her with my parents, as we did last week, for about 2hrs. I am very reluctant to go and leave her. The vicar was unfazed and understanding last week when another parent didn't make it so that's not a problem. I do feel slightly uncomfotable with this Christening (although it is my choice, and last week's lesson was fine) so I feel like I am using my daughter as an excuse to get out of it tonight- but she is my pfb and I can't help worrying about her. What if she gets really distressed again and even my mum (who is wonderful with her) can't comfort her like I can?

WIBU to send my DH on his own? I don't think anyone will mind really, but do you think it makes me look precious and flaky?

OP posts:
worraliberty · 26/10/2011 18:36

She'll be absolutely fine with your Mum I'm sure.

Gran's can be wonderful at soothing a sniffling baby and it's only for a couple of hours Grin

I would go and explain to the Vicar, I'm not being rude but need to leave my mobile on due to the baby not being too well.

meditrina · 26/10/2011 18:40

Chances are, she'll be absolutely fine with your mother.

Leave your mobile on - explain to your vicar that you may need to go home immediately if she takes a turn for the worse. It can't take that long to get home, surely?

MyRealName · 26/10/2011 18:43

Thanks. She'll l be fine really, it's not a big deal I know.

I don't know what it is about vicars that make me worry about being on my best behaviour!

OP posts:
exoticfruits · 26/10/2011 18:44

I'm sure you could get home quickly if necessary.

MyRealName · 26/10/2011 18:47

I could leave my phone on and get home fairly quickly.

I feel stupid now having written it down.

I swore I never would, but I have become one of those mothers.

OP posts:
meditrina · 26/10/2011 18:49

Don't worry - it's one of the many many times that, once you've worked out the fallback, you won't need it!

HappyCamel · 26/10/2011 18:57

Why not take her? She can sleep in your arms or in her car seat.

As a Christian I'm more concerned that you are committing to a Christening that you are uncomfortable with. What's worrying you about it? Would it be better to have a thanksgiving service now and go for a Christening later?

You are standing in public making promises for your daughter that you should mean. Jesus preached against people who pray on street corners. He was saying that it's wrong to use faith to get public attention or approval. if you can mean those promises then go for it.

The point of the classes is understanding the commitment you are making on her behalf if you aren't comfortable with it please don't do it. It's disrespectful to people who sincerely believe.

MyRealName · 26/10/2011 19:47

Thanks Happy. I will leave her rather than take her because I doubt she'll sleep!

I mentioned my (mild) discomfort to give full disclosure and allow MN to tell me not to make excuses (thanks MN). I didn't mean to offend, possibly offending anyone is the source of my concern and this thread in the first place! I am getting my DD christened after discussing honestly my reasons with the vicar because I was brought up in a Christian culture and it is important to mine and DH's familys. I am aware of the arguements for and against, but I have made peace with it and found my own way.

Anyway, got to go. Thanks MN

OP posts:
HappyCamel · 26/10/2011 21:30

You haven't offended me at all. If you've made your peace with it, that great. I pray that your family are welcomed and supported by the church and that you develop in your faith.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page