to not understand why someone wouldn't report and challenge a drunk driver?

[DogsBeastFiend]

This is inspired by a current thread but it's also something I question quite frequently as it comes up on MN from time to time.

I just don't understand why anyone wouldn't do something when they know someone drinks and drives, particulaly if they see it happening or travel in a drinker's car. I'm not anti alcohol, I have a glass of wine beside me as I type but I feel strongly about drink-driving.

Here's why. It's taken from a response to another poster tonight but is also something I have often said one way or another over the years I've been a member of MN:

My 17 year old cousin was a back seat passenger of a sober driver. His name was Kenny. A drunk driver jumped red lights and smashed into the car in which Kenny was travelling.

Kenny became a human vegetable that day.

Kenny's mum sat with him in hospital for a week before she had to consent to something no mother should ever have to do... to turn off the life support system on her adored, once so vibrant, kind and gentle firstborn son. And then she had to bury him.

My cousin lies cold and dead in Canadian ground because of a drunk driver.

Like me and Kenny's other English family, our elderly Nanny and Grandad weren't able to get over there to say their last goodbyes to the lad they had visited often and whom they loved dearly, as did we all.

WHY? Why dither about reporting and challenging a drunk driver? No excuses. None of this "But they need their car, they live in a village". People cope without a car in a village. I do, with DC as a lone parent and wihout support.

What I couldn't cope with is being without one of my children, as mu Aunt has to every day of her life. Nor could I cope with knowing that someone died and I could have prevented it.

Duchess, that is true. In some cases, you may put yourself in physical danger if you try and stop someone, for example.

it sounds like you have tried though

btw, has he not been banned yet ?

phone the police to pick him up when he is actually drink driving

a breathalyser cannot lie it's way out of it

if he has been banned, and then still drives, he will go to prison

thus making our roads safer from there being one less twat on them

Spookhetti that is terrible, some people really don't deserve children .

Our local landlord confiscates keys but about 5 years ago i worked in a pub and when i think about it now most of the customers would have been over the limit. I didn't report or i would have lost my job. I think barmaids are in an awful situation with regards to this.

I agree with the above that it was the older generation who was the worst for doing it.

YANBU, there is no excuse. I like a few glasses of wine of an evening, but live in an area with poor public transport at night and unreliable taxis so I take that into account when planning. I take turns being the designated (non drinking) driver if out with girlfriends, DH and I will often choose to eat in restaurants within walking distance, if I am invited somewhere half an hour's drive away and I don't really fancy being surrounded by drinkers and not being able to join them I refuse the invite. It's really not that difficult!

YANBU you drink or you drive they don't mix.

I agree about it sometimes being difficult. In that situation I would keep reporting to the police any time I knew them to be offending in the hope they would be caught before they killed somone. At least I would know I had done everything.

I know heidi it is awful. I also recently noticed that my dad is friends with her on facebook! I know they're family but I don't think I could acknowledge even knowing anyone like that!

Legal limit? What's that then?

I don't get it either.

My now dh was a typical young lad when we met, he liked his drink! He used to sit & drink at home with my mum & sister.

One night, just as he was about to drive home I took his car keys. Told him there was no way he was to drive under the influence again. He was annoyed, I pointed out that it was his choice to drink & drive & that if he got hurt it would be his own daft fault. But what of the innocent people he could have hit? It went backwards & forwards like that for a while. I told him if he left in his car, I'd call the police.

He walked home. He hasn't driven under the influence since.

I was 15 & he was 21 when I did this. I barely knew him really. I took a huge risk taking his keys away, but it worked. I found out recently that his parents & sister had tried in vein to stop him driving while drunk.

I don't understand why people look on passively.

YANBU at all.

My friends and I all seem to have the same attitude to drinking and driving, in that if we plan to drive we won't drink at all, not even one or two. We usually take turns to drive (I'm not much of a drinker these days so don't mind driving) or we'll get taxis or arrange a lift from someone's DH eg after a work do.

It must be very hard to challenge someone especially when someone's a nasty drunk. But I couldn't live with myself if I knew I had done nothing and someone was injured or killed.

ScaredBear it's not that black and white regarding the alcohol limit when driving. Too many factors can influence a blood alcohol level.

But I agree I wouldn't let my children in a car with anyone who had drunk any alcohol - I'm not willing to take a risk. Just because they might not be over the legal limit doesn't mean they're fit to drive.

Alcohol is processed differently by different people. Think that is only a guideline in measures

My step fil took part in a trial thing (he was a car dealership owner and was at some rally or other) with the police and was given some gin to drink then breath tested, he passed as fine to drive, he then did it again on another occasion when he had a cold, was given the same amount and was well over the limit. I think the police were demonstrating that the same amount of alcohol is absorbeed differently by individuals (step fil was not the only one taking part), but it also shows how it can vary with depending on health too.

Fil regularly drunk and drove in the fact he was an alcoholic so would always have alcohol in his system. I never allowed my children in the car with him and thankfully he was caught twice. He now has not touched a drop of alcohol in nearly 3 years (after the last time he was caught) and gets his licence back in about 6 months time. Usually when we were actually out with him his wife would drive, but I know he would drive home freom the pub daily. The first time he was caught the family are convinced someone reported him as they were 'lying in wait for him', both dh and I said good for that person!

Hear hear DogsBeastFiend

Not alcohol, but my grandfather was killed by a person who shouldn't have been driving.

An entitled idiot who thought he knew better than his doctors and didn't fancy being inconvenienced, so got in his car, had a blackout at the wheel and mowed down my grandfather in front of his wife and daughter.

I can't tell you how different the lives of so many people would have been if that hadn't happened, if that cretin had felt at least a smidgen of responsibility to the public, if he'd felt that using the public roads was a privilege to be used wisely, rather than a human right for the ignorant and selfish.

Twenty odd years ago, he was full of remorse at the inquest... I am guessing he himself will have passed away by now - I hope my grandfather was on his mind as his own life flashed before his eyes.

I see people driving like entitled shitbags every day here, I despise the people they are as soon as I see them cut up/run a red light/tailgate/speed... and I hope karma catches up with each and every one of them.