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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Childlike adult behaviour

60 replies

annalicious · 24/10/2011 19:24

Good evening, I am a new member with a slight concern! I am the Mum of a seven year old beautiful daughter, who is often getting left out from schoolfriends lives due to the fact that I (a very busy mummy) don't have time to stand in the playground with the rest of the clicky mums gossipping! I find it very sad that my daughter falls foul to such shameful adult behaviour..........................Am I being paranoid, no this is really happening?! Help

OP posts:
Fifis25StottieCakes · 24/10/2011 19:53

I know what you mean op. DD1 settled in fine but dd2 was constantly left out and had no friends for 2 years. The mothers in dd2's year were very pally and all the dd's done dancing and played around each others houses. Even the teachers noticed and pulled me in about it. Dd1 said she just sat by herself on a bench at break time.

She's fine now as some of them play with her. I've since found out she has dyslexia and a processing disorder so maybe she wasn't as confident as dd1 to just butt in and approach people.

chickswithbricks · 24/10/2011 19:54

I don't understand what is shameful about people chatting when they see each other. I would feel more ashamed about ignoring people. Not sure how you know they are gossiping if you aren't there.

EssentialFattyAcid · 24/10/2011 19:56

Sorry - I don't think you have explained what the issue is that you are concerned about.

Do you have one child or twins?

What is it that you think is happeneing exactly?

unfitmother · 24/10/2011 19:57

WTF is "clicky"?

squeakyfreakytoy · 24/10/2011 19:57

You sound hard work, to be honest.

You have only just moved to the area, so bound to know nobody, and you work full time, so again, not much chance to meet people at the school gates..

How this affects your daughter I have no idea, particularly as you have twins, and one of them seems popular...

DogsBeastFiend · 24/10/2011 19:58

A bit early to go on the sauce isn't it, annalicious?

:o

BluddyMoFo · 24/10/2011 19:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DogsBeastFiend · 24/10/2011 20:01

I have to add this, because it really gets on me thrupennies... it's "cliquey" not clicky.

EssentialFattyAcid · 24/10/2011 20:01

Why not be friendly to the mothers of your child's friends?

MigratingCoconuts · 24/10/2011 20:02

dogs its never too early [hgrin]

however, this is a very odd thread indeed.

MigratingCoconuts · 24/10/2011 20:03

ooh! cliquey!

I thought they were standing around making high pitched, short repeating noises in the playground...

onepieceofcremeegg · 24/10/2011 20:04

I don't think the op says she works outside the home, either ft or pt? (apologies if I have misunderstood though). She just refers to being busy. I may be wrong but if she was never at the gate due to work commitments maybe she would have clarified this. (or maybe not, the whole thread is rather confusing)

I was bemused that in the op there is mention of the dd, then all of a sudden a few posts down there is mention of twins...

Well we're all busy aren't we, even sahms or pt wohm?

onepieceofcremeegg · 24/10/2011 20:05

Too early at 19.58 DBF !? Grin

although perhaps if the op has such a complex situation, she should have typed an op whilst sober and then started on the sauce. Perhaps it would have been clearer to us all then. :)

EssentialFattyAcid · 24/10/2011 20:06

OP YABU

squeakyfreakytoy · 24/10/2011 20:08

Sorry, yes you are right CremeEgg... she just says she is a "very busy mummy".... Hmm

chickswithbricks · 24/10/2011 20:08

If she isn't at the gate she wouldn't know if the other non busy parents were gossiping or not, but if she is there then why doesn't she ask one of them if their kid can come over and play? How busy do you have to be before you can't say "'scuse, but could your dd come over and play after school next tuesday even though she isn't as beautiful as mine "

DogsBeastFiend · 24/10/2011 20:08

It is too early if it produces the OPs sort of gobbledegook, Coconuts and CremeEgg. :o

onepieceofcremeegg · 24/10/2011 20:11

lol, some of us talk all kinds of gobbledegook on here (although tonight I have only had hot chocolate and cranberry juice - separately, not mixed!)

ballstoit · 24/10/2011 20:11

Sorry, I am far too busy a Mummy to be arsed with this random thread Grin

onepieceofcremeegg · 24/10/2011 20:12

Well she is obviously off somewhere else now being very very busy. Grin

dikkertjedap · 24/10/2011 20:14

I think I understand your problem:

You are lovely and hard working and clever and busy and hate gossiping
Your daughter (well the half of the twin who is not invited) is also beautiful, lovely, and probably clever, etc
The other twin daughter, possibly slightly less, she does get invited, so she is probably a very ordinary nice girl
Arguably twin daughter two is also new to the area, so that is probably not so relevant.
It may be that the beauty and cleverness gets in the way of being invited and fitting in???

So, try to pretend not to be clever and dress down and gossip a little (hard I know but you may be able to develop the skill with some practice), then you should be all fine

aquashiv · 24/10/2011 20:16

If it were one invited and not the other then I would be a bit upset for one. Then again I would be glad that they were playing independently and making thier own friends.

DogsBeastFiend · 24/10/2011 20:16

I, of course, never speak gobbledegook. My nature not in it's.

LoveBeingAWitch · 24/10/2011 20:18

Does her twins mum stand and gossip? Confused

MigratingCoconuts · 24/10/2011 20:18

I do gobbledegook always

reaches for red wine and realises glass is empty