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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not really want to organise 'playdates' for my girls during half term?

18 replies

lottielou39 · 24/10/2011 16:22

I'm 34 weeks pregnant and feeling quite tired and grouchy at the moment; not sleeping very well either. I'm still working 3 days a week, (for the next fortnight) but finish fairly early so could still arrange to have their friends over later in the afternoon/evening and on my days off. But I cannot be arsed. I really can't. Is that awful? I don't have the energy to deal with extra children around the house, feeding them, keeping them happy, then the begging for sleepovers (not in the mood for another sleepover until baby has arrived) etc. Today was lovely. I wasn't at work. We all had a lie in, till nine thirty. Then we had a lazy brekkie, went shopping for Halloween outfits, watched crap on SKY, and the girls have been in and out of the house all day playing in our cul de sac/local park on their bikes whilst I've done some housework and changed the bedding etc. By the look of Facebook, many people are off doing various craft activities and outings with a large group of friends on a daily basis. I just want to be a lazy antisocial mare at the mo. So AIBU?

OP posts:
ujjayi · 24/10/2011 16:30

YANBU

Your day sounds v similar to mine. I am afraid that during half term I am rather selfish and like to spend the time one-on-one with my DCs. Unless they express a wish to meet up with friends we tend to just hang out at home and do "stuff" :). Longer holidays are different though - definitely do meeting up with friends then.

Jackstini · 24/10/2011 16:32

I think YABU not to see if your girls can go to their friends for a couple of short playdates to give you a rest!
Seriously, YANBU, do what you like with them and enjoy it.

lottielou39 · 24/10/2011 16:33

that's the thing though Jackstini, friends usually end up coming here, rather than the other way around. I don't mind them going elsewhere to see friends at all!!!

OP posts:
worraliberty · 24/10/2011 16:34

Uggghhh what is it with 'playdates' now days?

When I was a kid we were either allowed a friend around or we weren't. If we were, we amused ourselves.

YANBU to feel that way but YABU if you automatically believe what people are putting on Facebook...just cos they're putting it on there.

Unless you live on a motorway, let them play out and enjoy the fresh air.

lottielou39 · 24/10/2011 18:03

it's much easier now they've got a small group of friends they can play with outside on their bikes; I'd much rather they did that than sit in the lounge on the PS3!

OP posts:
pecanpie · 24/10/2011 18:27

YANBU. It's too much to be picking up after kids all day when you're only 6 weeks off EDD. We had half term last week and I'm approx as pregnant as you - kids and friends made a huge mess and it was hard work picking up after them (except for the one day where I said no lunch till room was tidy and DD1 basically instructed ordered her 2 boy-friends as to where everything went) . Arrangements made well in advance when I hadn't considered the physical stress of being 35 weeks pregnant. Enjoy your lie-ins - and is there any way you can send your girls out for playdates so you get a bit of a break?

usualsuspect · 24/10/2011 18:31

Why can't kids nowadays just play with the local kids outside?

I don't understand the playdate thing at all

Jackstini · 24/10/2011 18:55

How old are they ll? Get them to organise their own play, pref at other people houses!
Have you got any 'mum' friends that appreciate how knackered you might be and will arrange something at theirs?
Do your girls actuallycare or are they quite happy chilling at home with you anyway?! If so - who cares!

ilovesooty · 24/10/2011 21:24

Why can't kids nowadays just play with the local kids outside?

I don't understand the playdate thing at all

Glad someone else said that...

Beamur · 24/10/2011 21:27

I'm not arranging any playdates this half term. I've got things I want us to do, but I rather enjoy spending time with my DD by myself, she gets to play with friends at school and in no time she'll be old enough to organise her own social life. If anything, I'm favouring hiding out a bit and avoiding other kids for the next few days Grin. She had a friend call round yesterday which ended up with them both being a bit rude and grumpy with me, so I'm in no hurry to repeat it.

manicinsomniac · 24/10/2011 21:35

I heard someone use the term playdate in real life the other day - hilarious! instantly thought they must be a mumsnetter!

but no, YANBU. I don't really like other kids round either, house is too small.

NorfolkBroad · 24/10/2011 21:43

You don't sound lazy or anti social at all. You sound like you are having a lovely time with your kids. Carry on! Good luck with DC 3.

squeakyfreakytoy · 24/10/2011 21:46

If they have friends outside, and each other, that they can play with, there is no need to "arrange" anything...

I do hate the term "playdate" too...

staylucky · 24/10/2011 23:21

The October half term is for spending on the sofa!
We couldn't do much during the big hols
this year and I got quite teary now and again because FB seemed
full of families having holidays of a lifetime, days out, adventures and friends over. But then people really only post to have a brag don't they?

You well deserve the rest, get your feet up!

TheBestWitch · 24/10/2011 23:26

YANBU. Surely only preschoolers need the sort of playdate were you have to stand over them. Like you said older kids tend to have local friends they can amuse themselves with.

seeker · 24/10/2011 23:30

"Why can't kids nowadays just play with the local kids outside?"

Because their parents may not be CRB checked.....

duckdodgers · 24/10/2011 23:31

"Why can't kids nowadays just play with the local kids outside?

I don't understand the playdate thing at all"

Im with you here usualsuspect, my boys do this - I don't have to "arrange" for friends to come to the house, they all play out in the street and garden. If DS2 wants friends in to his room I let him, he gets them juice etc if need be, I dont need to do anything!

Do people actually use this term in rl Grin

AnxiousElephant · 24/10/2011 23:36

I don't think YABU but that said my dd is 5 and doesn't play out away from the house, all the children live a few streets away and I don't want her wandering so I do invite her friends round if she wants company. If it is wet they do arts and crafts, play upstairs having a mock disco, making up games..........I don't do entertaining them Grin. One of her friends mothers is also my friend so we have a Brew Grin

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