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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think my dad actually has a point about this? (Boring - kids' football).

37 replies

Cathycomehome · 23/10/2011 23:08

My son's football team recently won 19 - 0, with my son scoring quite a few (8? 9? dunno) of those goals. My mum and dad came to watch the match. Son and mates obviously well chuffed, but my dad, after congratulating my son on playing well, said "It would have been more gentlemanly to stop after about 3-0".

I did feel a bit sorry for the other team.

OP posts:
cantspel · 23/10/2011 23:13

I bet it was a cup game.

I always feel sorry when a lower division team gets a thrashing by a higher division team in the cup. I do wonder why some mangers enter their team when they know that they are not going to get passed the first round.

Maryz · 23/10/2011 23:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Cathycomehome · 23/10/2011 23:16

It wasn't a cup game this time - my son's team got thrashed 6-0 when it was, and they were a bit down hearted. I just kind of saw my dad's point that 19 was a bit, well, unnecessary. (Is that how you spell unnecessary? It looks wrong).

OP posts:
DogsBeastFiend · 23/10/2011 23:18

I'm a qualified ref and used to officiate in both adult and kids games. It's hard on the losing team but I'm not sure I agree with your Dad... losing is part of life and although it's a disappointment, IME and seeing the kids back on the pitch a few weeks later when I reffed their next match it didn't seem to deter them.

The kids weren't the problem at all, come to think of it. It was the bloody pushy parents. They were often a nightmare! I was far from the only ref who said that at times they were tempted to give an arsey parent the whistle and say, "You ref it then mate!".

cantspel · 23/10/2011 23:19

If it was league then you need to score as many goals as possible or you could miss out on winning the league on goal difference.

If this team was so bad that they let 19 in against you then you can bet your life other teams will also be getting the high numbers.

Original poster
Cathycomehome · 23/10/2011 23:21

Grin I've cringed at the shouty weird - it's kids' football pushy parents, too, DogsBeastFiend.

These are under 13s, my son's eleven and I think most of them are twelve, Maryz, sorry, missed your post.

OP posts:
cantspel · 23/10/2011 23:27

my son is older and the older the boys get the more vocal the parents get.

I can be quite lound myself but only in a good way and even though we our cheering on our boys we will still give a clap if the oposition goalie makes a great save. But at the end of the day our boys are going out there to win. They want to enjoy themselves whilst they are doing it but at the end of the day we want the 3 points.

Original poster
Cathycomehome · 23/10/2011 23:30

Well, I agree that ours want to win,cantspel, but 19?? It does seem a bit much! They'd have got the three points anyway.

OP posts:
cantspel · 23/10/2011 23:33

yes but what if the top spot in the league goes down to goal difference and they lose out on the title because they stopped putting the ball in the net after 3 goals.

lenak · 23/10/2011 23:36

I bet a few Man U fans are wishing Man City had been more gentlemanly and stopped at 3 earlier today Wink Grin

ChippingInToThePumpkinLantern · 23/10/2011 23:39

No - I don't agree with him, sorry. It's the sporting equivalent of 'dumbing down'... it's just wrong to expect a child (in particular) to dumb down/do less than they're able to, so that they don't show someone up. Would you like him to spell a few words wrong so he doesn't get 10/10 in a spelling test so another child isn't upset?

The organisers need to look at how the league is organised and see if there's any grading they can do, if not, that's life.

ChippingInToThePumpkinLantern · 23/10/2011 23:40

Perhaps the All Blacks had had your Dad talking to them??

Original poster
Cathycomehome · 23/10/2011 23:40

Grin Man U are professional footballers - these are a bunch of kids playing in the freezing cold and some of us parents would rather have been down the pub having a nice lunch than shouting "Ref!! Ref!! That's UNBELIEVABLE" on a village sports field

OP posts:
Original poster
Cathycomehome · 23/10/2011 23:43

Agree about the league, Chipping. It's a bit harsh if that's going to be the other teams experience of the season.

But they aren't professional footballers and it's meant to be fun even if MY son has been asked to trials for two fairly rubbish professional clubs, oh no I'm not preening at all

OP posts:
cantspel · 23/10/2011 23:44

The league would have been set on last seasons results but at y=under 12's the teams can change so much over the summer and what could have been a strong team last season is now a struggling team.

They will either ride out the season and go down a division next year or they will fold but you cant go easy on them just because it would be gentlemanly to stop after about 3-0

lenak · 23/10/2011 23:48

I know Cathy - Just got MOTD2 on in the background ..... (and laughing....)

I don't know about the kids - 19 does seem a little obscene, but it's all part of life. Sport is not and should not be an exercise in socialist equality.

I would have thought winning 19-0 would be less satisfying than say 3-1 though - because it was obviously too easy!

Original poster
Cathycomehome · 23/10/2011 23:51

I guess - it's just not cricket though, is it? [grin[

OP posts:
Original poster
Cathycomehome · 23/10/2011 23:52

Or Grin, even.

OP posts:
Maryz · 24/10/2011 00:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Cathycomehome · 24/10/2011 00:06

I guess, Maryz - I cetainly had no compunction about putting three past the other team when I was on playground duty and decided to join in on Thursday - they were year 4....Blush

OP posts:
shorty100 · 24/10/2011 08:32

They are meant to be changing this in kids football so even if a team win by a massive amount it will be put down as a 1-0 score. My son plays football for am under 7s team and I don't agree this is the right thing to do. I think kids need to be taught that sometimes you aren't the best at something. I don't think this false protection to make kids non competitive isn't going to end well. Sport is competitive.

Original poster
Cathycomehome · 24/10/2011 10:34

Ah well. It seems that I (and my dad) are BU then.

OP posts:
grovel · 24/10/2011 10:38

YABVU.

They should have stopped scoring at 4 nil.

Whatmeworry · 24/10/2011 10:41

The kids weren't the problem at all, come to think of it. It was the bloody pushy parents. They were often a nightmare! I was far from the only ref who said that at times they were tempted to give an arsey parent the whistle and say, "You ref it then mate!"

DH used to coach rugby, he would say the same re parents!

I don't think losing 19-0 is bad per se, losing is a part of life - but triumphal crowing by the winners would have been inappropriate, they are clearly mismatched.

cantspel · 24/10/2011 10:43

grovel do you tell your children to stop trying in their maths test when they have done enough to get a pass or do you expect them to carry on and try for a A?