to be dreading going to the hairdressers?

[Ormirian]

I hate the way I look atm. I am going through the menopause and feeling fairly crap most of the time. I have huge black rings under my eyes, dry skin, spots would you beleive, and my hair is really brittle. Partly because of this I haven't been to the hairdressers for years - since the lovely lady that cut my hair went on maternity leave and passed me on to a pubescent child called Liam who talked about 'product' and charged me twice as much for a cut and blow dry! So I have been trimming it myself and it's now a complete mess.

I don't want to go and sit and stare at my hideous reflection for 30 mins. Talk bullshit with someone I don't know and is secretly wondering if I wouldn't be better off with a blue rinse .

It's just a chore really. A chore I have to pay for.

Oh and to add to my joy DS2 is booked in for a haircut at the same time so I will be keeping an eye on him too. And I will have to subject his head to Agent Orange just to be totally sure he's free of headlice.

I'm sorry you're feeling so shitty at the mo.

Can you arrange for someone to come to your house and cut it for you (and your son) in the comfort of your own home? (and not in front of scary hairdresser mirrors and lights)

I'm going tomorrow - thanks Mum [hhmm] - as a 30th birthday present.

I will take my glasses off and shut my eyes. I'm not menopausal but am streaming with cold and have spots all over my cheeks - they seem to be slipping south as I age, they started off on my forehead when i was 9 maybe they'll be around my belly button when I'm 50 and I'll be able to hide them?

I can't find anyone who does that. And it has to be this Friday as it's the only day both DS and I are at home.

I hate going too, I don't like being asked on a week day where I'm going out that evening (?!) and my hair always looks awful for at least two weeks afterwards :(

YANBU!!!
I hate having my hair done!!!

I'm trimming mine at home for the foreseeable future. I do very little to it, just a little layering. I did a hairdressing course at 16 so can get away with it. I totally understand how you feel, I hate going to the hairdresser.

I know it is a pain to find a hairdresser you can trust, but they do exist, honestly. As you have discovered doing your hair yourself isn't giving you the results you want.

Are there friends and family you can ask to recommend a hairdresser? The other option is to walk into a few different hairdressers and talk to them and let them know what your concerns are. A good hairdresser will listen to you and give you a nice haircut.

I have the sort of hair that needs regular attention and not going to the hairdresser is not an option for me. I have found one who understands my hair etirely and I don't get the inane chatter. In fact she is very quiet and I often sit and read while she is doing my hair.

I used to hate going to the hairdressers too. So much so that i would only go once avery six months or so and get a trim. My hair had no style to speak of and just got too long and straggly.

I have now found a lovely lady who I confessed my hatred of hairdressing establishments too. She is a mobile hairdresser, so she usually comes to my house to do it, or sometimes I go to her house.

I now get it cut every 6-8 weeks and feel happier with my hair.

Google mobile hairdresser for your area or ask around to see if anyone knows someone. That is how I found mine.

Oh dear, you've got yourself into a bit of a vicious circle haven't you. You won't start to feel better about the way you look until you've had a decent hair cut. Choose a new hairdresser (if you don't like it, you don't ever have to go back there), and just accept that 'product' is what they now call things like conditioner, wax, mousse etc etc. It's just a word. Put some make-up on (dark circles, dry skin and spots are what concealer and foundation were invented for), a smart top, and turn up armed with an idea of what you would like them to do. It's only 30 minutes, and you'll feel better for it.

And if you don't want to talk bullshit, don't.

I just used a mobile hairdresser for the first time and I don't think I'll ever go back to a salon. Great cut, cheaper, comfort and privacy of my own home, and a lovely, older, experienced hairdresser. My childminder recommended her.