Have also posted in what would you do, as I am desperate, and have reached the end of my here to fore unending patience. Here goes:
My dp has mental health issues. Mostly he is low, depressed, doesn't go out, doesn't wash, etc. I can't motivate him, I love him, but I cannot go on with our life as it is. He refuses to get any help from his doctor, and believes he can do it himself (ie can manage his life).
The house, due to his lack of personal care, leaves the kitchen filthy, bathroom in a disgusting condition, and so on. I come in from work, open windows, clean, cook, do homework, housework, prepare for the next day, bath, read bedtime stories, listen to his day (!), and then fall into a heap in bed. Get up the next morning and do the whole mary poppins routine, and feel like going crazy. He thinks he doesn't need help with how he is. I cannot move him, he appears to not want to chance. I am exhausted and feel that I have to do something to survive.
My need for advice is this:
The house is in a horrible condition. The children hate it. It embarrasses them and they don't want to have friends over, etc.
I feel that the only option open to me is to move out to rented accommodation, hopefully for not too long, but long enough to help us all get some normality. I do worry about him and how he would cope, but feel that children's needs have to come first here, for once in their lives.
DP is welcome to come with us, but I suspect that he will refuse (on the basis that he believes that he has a perfectly good house to live in and that I just simply don't do enough around the house, or make it so that he finds it hard to work around me - I work eight hours a day).
What would ye do?
AIBU in actively seeking other homes for us to live in?