to also wonder what "the mean girl" said to my neighbour so he had to phone his mum sobbing at 4am in the hallway?

[MrsHuxtable]

Sigh. We share our hallway with one other flat. Last month 2 second year stundent boys moved in. It's a pain in the backside. They constantly have people over at night, banging doors every 3 minutes to go outside for a smoke, let their friends shout in the hallway in the middle of the night etc. It wakes us up constantly.

DH had to have a word with them before. Even let them come into our flat at 4am to let them hear for themselves how loud their shouting and door banging is.

They did it again last night. Woke us up before they went out at 12, then again when they brought shouting girls back at 2. At 4, the door banging started again so DH got up to shout. Before he got the chance, he overheard one of the boys crying in the hallway. On the phone to his MUM! He wanted to know from her how this "mean girl" could say such a mean thing to him. He was sobbing.

AIBU to really really want to know what the mean girl said? Presumably after he took her home to his flat.
AI also BU to wonder what his mum answered?

Oh come on - any 19 year old (male or female) who is as inconsiderate as the ones the OP is currently living beside deserves no sympathy. If any of my children phone me at 4am sobbing about mean girls/boys will get short shrift.

In scotland the cut off for school starters is the end of feb not the end of august.

I went to uni when I was 17. One of my sisters went after 5th year when she was 16

Sounds straight out of Fresh Meat
I wouldn't be so thrilled if I was his mother, either. 4am! Time for a pep talk. You have to find out!

At 17? Can't be common to start then?

I love the faux concern strategy to get them to shut up as well. The fact that he referred to her as a "mean girl" isn't promising on the non-Mummy's boy stakes

DD is young in her year group so she was still 17 when she took her A levels, went to university at 18 and is now in her second year aged 19. She'll still be 19 by the time this academic year ends.

I fear she and her friends have riled their downstairs neighbour. My sympathies are with the neighbour.

We are in Scotland but both boys are from England. They look more like 20 / 21 maybe. Gap year perhaps?

Downbytheriver I eventually went to sleep at 5 this morning and that's not unusual since they moved in.
They are grown up people, who chose to not live in halls but in an apartment block with professionals and young families. They should behave appropriately. If they think they have to get themselves into a drunken state several nights a week, they have to deal with the consequenses. Simple. And if they were my children, boy or girl, I'd tell them as much.

If my boy called me at 0400 and was not dying I'd kill him [hgrin]

Btw, DH and I are only a few years older. Him 25, I'm 28. I know what it's like to be at uni. Still, if you decide to live in "grown up" accomadation, behave accordingly.

I have to think that if my DS calls me at 4am when he is that age (a way off, but still) my answer would be something along the lines of "FFS, go to sleep and call me at a civilised hour when you are sober"

You have to go over (or send DH) to say "you have to tell us - we are dying to know - what was it the mean girl said which made it neccesary to call your mother at 4am from the hallway?"

If that doesn't shame them into behaving sociably, nothing will

'They are grown up people, who chose to not live in halls but in an apartment block with professionals and young families. They should behave appropriately. If they think they have to get themselves into a drunken state several nights a week, they have to deal with the consequenses. Simple. And if they were my children, boy or girl, I'd tell them as much.'

Absolutely, I'd be complaining to them, their landlords and their uni or college. But I wouldn't be mocking a sobbing boy in the hall, even anonymously. That's like having a horrible child in your class and being pleased when they leave, or they have something dreadful happen in their lives.
But I'm more of an age to be his mother, or your for that matter.

'your' ?
'yours'

Some annoying teenager has been eating stuff whilst on the laptop and the s key is sticky...

Hahaha, I only graduated this year and would have been very 'mean girl' esqe to this mummies boy. :o

I think you're being very mean yourself laughing at his distress. You don't know what happened.

The noise would annoy me - I imagine they're living there because student rentals are usually so awful.

In Scotland About half of freshers are 17. Anyone who is 18 before the end of February could start.

I chose not to go to Uni, but Had I done I would have goen four months shy of my 17th birthday. So being at uni youngis entirely normal in Scoltand.

lol and not proof reading your post is also entirely normal lol.

@ mean girl.

definatly go over and ask if he's alright as he seemed mightily upset over the 'mean girl' at 4am, so upsat in fact he couldn't even put some clothes on.

Maybe the only answer you'll get is but it may shut him up for a bit.

I'm actually starting to feel like a heartless mean girl now. But tbh if you'd been awake in bed for 6 hours til 5 in the morning, you wouldn't feel very charitable either. Maybe it's because I'm only pregnant and not actually a mum yet.

Knocked on the door. They won't open. I know they are at home. I think they're scared because when they made the noise at 12 and DH asked them to keep their guests in their flat and not the hallway, they were talking back to him and he shouted. We're obviously bullies .

They also have the same letting agent with the same contract that states very clearly they can't make noise at night and have to respect their neighbour's right to peace.

So what will I do? talking to them works for 2 days and then it's all forgotten again. What happens when the baby is here? How will I lift the pram over the sick they left on the stairs? DH has cleaned it today.

Have a funny feeling if you ask him they might quieten down a bit!

I think Mean Girl had just said,

"Your mum" to him.

Well at least you won't feel bad if the baby cries in the night and wakes them up.

They need to clean up their own sick. Seriously. I wouldn't stop banging on their door until they did.

Given that he's such a mummy's boy, I think that rather than send DH over, go over yourself in dressing gown and slippers and have a complete hissy fit at him next time. Being shouted at by a woman may have more impact.

"Knocked on the door. They won't open. I know they are at home."
Hopefully they are asleep, with the hours they keep. Go back and knock for 5 minutes every half hour. Repeat until they give up in despair and answer the door. Ask them how they like sleep deprivation?

"They also have the same letting agent with the same contract that states very clearly they can't make noise at night and have to respect their neighbour's right to peace."
Then go to the letting agent and complain loud and long EVERY TIME they break the terms of their lease. Even of the agent doesn't respond immediately, they will quickly learn that you will be on their backs until they do. Insist that SOMETHING BE DONE about these two tossers inconsiderate neighbours.

"How will I lift the pram over the sick they left on the stairs?"
You won't. They'll either be gone, or it will be cleaned by you and DH wiping the floor with their best shirt while they are still wearing it.

Oh, oh, just got an idea from Lynette 's post! When the baby cries at night, would it be a good idea to soothe him/her in the hallway, because you wouldn't want to disturb DH, he needs his sleep? And in the mornings and afternoons too, because they have to try to sleep sometime, don't they?

You do need to start getting tough with them. Perhaps a final warning and make it clear that if the noise/anti-social behaviour doesn't improve you will contact their letting agents/landlord/tutors every single time there is a problem.

And then do it. Like Whereyouleftit says, keep on and on until you get action. I would be particularly persistent with the university about it.