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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be a wimp and nervous

20 replies

OldGreyWassailTest · 15/10/2011 13:00

I am 66, have raised my son alone (now 27 with Aspergers). I am intelligent, computer literate, and sit at home all day (rural village) with nothing to do except the evening meal (and read Mumsnet).

I have become aware that volunteers are needed in the nearest town for a Homeless Project and I have been told I would be exceptionally welcome and my skills can be put to good use.

However, AIBU to feel really nervous of doing this because I have not 'worked' for so long and have lost my confidence? I used to mix well and be a friendly person, but have gone into my shell somewhat over my years at home. Please boost my confidence and tell me I really can do this!

OP posts:
MrBloomsNursery · 15/10/2011 13:02

You can do this!! Don't think of it as a job - think of it as a past time activity and a way of socialising or meeting new people and you will be fine! Good luck!!

ujjayi · 15/10/2011 13:04

YANBU to be nervous about a new venture.

It is perfectly understandable that you will doubt your ability. However, the organisation has told you that you already have everything they are looking for in a volunteer so have some faith in yourself. You have gone in to your shell possibly because you do spend too much time alone. When you spend some time in your new volunteer role, your confidence and your ease at socialising will come flooding back :)

Good luck, take a deep breath and jump on in :)

belledechocchipcookie · 15/10/2011 13:04

Of course you're not unreasonable to be nervous! You need to bite the bullet and go for it. You'll walk through the door and it will all be fine. You should be proud that you've taken the initiative Smile

SmethWitchBelle · 15/10/2011 13:06

You can do it and I bet you'd be marvellous at it! You don't want to think "what if" also if you really don't get on with it you're in charge and can decide to try something else.

Vinomcstephens · 15/10/2011 13:11

Of course you're not being unreasonable! I'm always a wreck before starting a new job but have always been absolutely fine once I've started. Go on, give it a try - and if it's not for you then you know at leas you gave it a try :)

Original poster
OldGreyWassailTest · 15/10/2011 13:16

You're all right - I WILL give it a go. Thanks for all your kind words.

OP posts:
Salmotrutta · 15/10/2011 13:16

We all get nervous with a new venture.
Give it a go and I'll bet you get on fine. If it's a physically active kind of role you can make use of that to be "busy" and just indulge in a little bit of chat when you feel like it and ease yourself in.

Salmotrutta · 15/10/2011 13:17

Good for you! Good luck! Smile

CailinDana · 15/10/2011 13:51

Ask plenty of questions and don't be afraid to make mistakes. You don't have to be perfect. Good luck :)

lemmein · 15/10/2011 13:51

PLEASE do it....honestly, its never as bad in reality as you imagine in your head and ya might just like it.

I've stayed at home for years with my kids - my youngest is 13(!). I had no confidence at all. I wanted to do something for years but fear got in the way.

I'm aware I'm going to sound a bit bonkers here but 6 months ago I bought an hypnosis app from itunes and honestly it has changed my life. I started voluntary work and a college course and I'm loving every single second of it. I'd never considered the possibility that I could enjoy doing anything!

You are still the same person you always have been. That bright, friendly person who used to mix well is still there, you will be amazed how quickly you find her again when you start doing something you enjoy.

Please, please, please do it.......if you hate it you don't have to stay, but you may love it. It could change your life. Good luck.

MarianneM · 15/10/2011 13:55

I think you will find your confidence when helping out people who are isolated, ostracised and probably feeling much more nervous than you!

Good luck! You sound like a lovely person!

grograg · 15/10/2011 14:03

YANBU to be nervous

I posted about something similar the other day and in the end i went along and got on great :)

KittyFane · 15/10/2011 14:31

Be confident, you'll love it! :o

ilovesooty · 15/10/2011 15:57

Please do it: this area of work needs people who care. I'm sure you'll be great and your skills will be most welcome.

Floggingmolly · 15/10/2011 17:24

Please do it. You'll benefit, and so will the people you'll help. Everybody wins! Smile

Fiendishlie · 15/10/2011 17:24

You sound lovely. You have nothing to lose, be bold, it'll be fine. Good luck

aldiwhore · 15/10/2011 17:26

You can do this and tbh your age has nothing to do with anything, you're just HUMAN. Grasp this opportunity with both hands (and feet, like a baby chimp).

hauntmenow · 15/10/2011 17:33

You'll love it!

I work almost full time as avolunteer, and also spend my off days on Mumsnet, which is also fun, but the days I work are SO much more fulfilling.

Jawbreaker · 15/10/2011 17:40

Go for it. Remember, you have loads to offer! And of course you'll be a bit nervous at first, but soon enough you'll get to know people and gain confidence in whatever it is that you'll be doing.

FabbyChic · 15/10/2011 18:27

Hey honey do it, it will get you out the house, and build your confidence.

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