to expect DH to be a grown-up on school nights?

[bibab]

Most nights I do tea, homework, bath, bedtime, clear up, get uniform for 5-year old DS next day, blah blah, like every other parent. When I work late/go out and DH does it, I come home at 8pm to dishes/mess, and DH & DS playing (no bath, no homework etc) so that bedtime is tired & hysterical. I love the fact they play BUT BUT BUT. Nice asking and nagging DH haven't worked... Ideas pls?

YANBU and I really don't know what to suggest. It must be very annoying indeed. Divorce him?

In fact last night I got home at 7.15 and both DC were still up and I was a teeny bit annoyed about that despite DH having done everything else inc next days lunch, our dinner and all the ironing

My god that would drive me crazy.

You will get a lot of 'Just TELL him it's unacceptable, I don't understand why any women put up with this' in response.

But that response always annoys me because if you could just TELL people what they need to do and they'd do it then you wouldn't be posting would you?

How often does he put ds to bed? If it's only once a month perhaps you just have to suck it up and relax a bit.

If it's very week then can you sit down with him and explain it's for ds's well being and routine to get this sorted ie more important than he thinks.

Tell him that unless he can carry out the tasks that need to be done in order for the house to run smoothly then you will have to give up your job and he will have to take on a second job to cover the loss of income.

Can you make a list and stick it up? We have a list of what each DD needs to take with them to school each day, which helps whoever is getting their bags ready (which 99.9% of the time is me, even if I'm in at midnight )

Stay out later for a start - if you take over as soon as you get in then no wonder he's not doing any of it.

yanbu.... but I never found a way to make it happen.

we are now separated and i put dd to bed whilst he is here, because he will not leave in time to wave at the window and then get her to bed. ds could reaally do with going to bed earlier too, but will not settle until he has waved. tis very annoying.