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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to quit childminding after two weeks?

56 replies

MaryPoppinsMagic · 11/10/2011 08:01

Posted a few threads about the troubles I have been having with getting paid by parents that I have taken on, I have been registered for 2 weeks and after yesterday I just want to quit...

The college paying for one parents fees has told the parent to move her youngest into a nursery as apparently they have deals with them where they don't have to hurry payments through, the college also told the parent they are going to ring ncma as they feel childminders should not be able to ask to be paid upfront.. What the actual fck??

This same parent owes me £118, I agreed she could pay me half on the 10th (yesterday) and half next monday... Shock horror she came yesterday to pick her children up and said oh I don't have the money to give you!

Then another parent (who is very well off) each week has fussed over payment, they were supposed to give me £48.75 on friday. The dad turned up and gave me £30 then yesterday the mum turns up and gives me £10 then tells me to add the rest onto the next bill!!!!

So I am left with no money yet shattered from being very accommodating (3 school runs to the same school every day) to help out 1 parent.

Aibu just to quit this???

OP posts:

mycatoscar · 11/10/2011 09:55

My childminder takes a cheque every friday in arrears - I think she is very trusting. Having said that, if I didnt give her the cheque on the friday, she wouldnt take dd the next week and given her 25 years as a childminder she can probably tell who is honest and who isnt pretty quick.

I think it helps that her services are in great demand, she wouldnt be afraid of terminating a rubbish payer, I know that.

Don't quit OP, just give these 2 families a definate date to pay by and if they don't then terminate and refuse to take the children again. Not all families are like this, I would never dream of pissing off my childminder - I need her too much! Make sure that with any new families you make it crystal clear when payment is due and what happens if they miss this date (eg late payments, penalties, witholding chilcare or termnation of contract)

Original poster

MaryPoppinsMagic · 11/10/2011 10:55

Well I have spoken to the ncma and they have given me some advice on what to do,

The parent said she would call me this morning about paying me the money.. Surprise no phone call!!

I think if I have heard nothing by 4pm I will call and say I will only do the hours already paid and no extra

OP posts:

Original poster

MaryPoppinsMagic · 11/10/2011 10:55

Well I have spoken to the ncma and they have given me some advice on what to do,

The parent said she would call me this morning about paying me the money.. Surprise no phone call!!

I think if I have heard nothing by 4pm I will call and say I will only do the hours already paid and no extra

OP posts:

StillSquiffy · 11/10/2011 11:08

But if you refuse to perform your side of the bargain then you are also in breach of contract and she would then be entitled to remove her child and not pay you notice.......

Far better to hand her a letter to state that the terms of the contract are mutually binding and that she is currently in breach of contract, and needs to make her payments up to date immediately. You should also state that if she feels unable to continue using you as a childminder, then she will need to give you the required X weeks of notice and that you will of course be able to look after her child during this period of notice. Then state that you are sure that the payment issues are only temporary and that she will get her finances sorted going forward, but that you are providing a professional service which has been contracted for and that you will not hesitate to resort to legal enforcement to obtain monies owing, should this be required.

Original poster

MaryPoppinsMagic · 11/10/2011 11:13

I have been doing her a huge favour by taking the kids for extra hours without getting her to pay up front,

I wouldn't be breaching my side of the contract if I said I will only look after the children for the amount of hours I have been paid for up to date.

I am so stressed and down about all this! I have a banging headache today as I am so worried where the money is going to come from, I'm shattered from working the longest hours I have done in over 2 years.. With not much to show for it!

OP posts:

Original poster

MaryPoppinsMagic · 11/10/2011 11:13

I have been doing her a huge favour by taking the kids for extra hours without getting her to pay up front,

I wouldn't be breaching my side of the contract if I said I will only look after the children for the amount of hours I have been paid for up to date.

OP posts:

pigletmania · 11/10/2011 12:07

The op us well within her rights to stipulate a date when she wants paying in full and if the don't pay terminate their contract and refuse to take their children. She is a business not a charity, why should she look after their kids for free! The parents are taking the piss big time.

Original poster

MaryPoppinsMagic · 11/10/2011 12:35

Update:

The parent has called to tell me she still has not been paid. I am afraid i wasn't so accomodating this time, i informed her if this was the case i am unable to do any further extra hours and will only do the hours i have been paid for.

She seemed rather annoyed at me..

OP posts:

pigletmania · 11/10/2011 12:43

God Mary that I'd appalling they expect something for nothing. Taking the piss, they could not do that if their dc was at nursery. They have the gall to be annoyed at you. If you don't receive payment from them terminate

sunshineandbooks · 11/10/2011 12:52

I'd go with Hatti's suggestion. I have a CM and I always pay in advance. Even though I am unbelievably skint as a result of childcare fees, I value my CM so much that I no longer ask for a refund for the occasional days she may have off for whatever reason (which I could insist on under the terms of our contract). In return she is flexible with me if I am 10 minutes late now and again or need extra hours at short notice. It works both ways.

A good CM is a priceless asset and to be treasured. Ditch these parents as they clearly have not understood this.

ArtVandelay · 11/10/2011 12:57

Don't give up - just give these parents notice and get some good parents/children.

You have got something to show for it - you have learned some very important lessons that will serve you well for the coming years!

mumofthreekids · 11/10/2011 12:59

I am the treasurer of a playgroup (which is run as a charity). Fees for the children who are not eligible for govt funding are payable in advance for each half term and I have endless trouble chasing parents for overdue fees. We are not currently full, so we can't realistically afford to kick out the children if their fees aren't paid.

It drives me up the wall. It's also very awkward at times, as my children attend the playgroup too and all go on to the same local school so I don't want to make enemies of their friends' parents.

However, we do always eventually receive the correct money. I think these people are thoughtless and disorganised rather than trying to con you. They are used to being a bit slow with paying bills etc and aren't thinking about how it affects your life.

If I were you I would stick with the childminding (assuming you are enjoying it apart from this issue) and accept that this is an unforeseen and unwelcome part of the job.

Original poster

MaryPoppinsMagic · 11/10/2011 13:52

i really cannot see how a parent of children could do this to someone, i am a mother and my job is a childminder i rely on my income as much as the next person does.

It really is frustrating me, i would never put anyone in the position she is putting me in.. she hasn't even paid me for meals for this week however is still expecting me to pay for the food to feed her children!

I am off to gather up DP's buttons off his clothes to see if tesco will exchange them for groceries! i am sure they won't mind me taking the items for nothing!

OP posts:

pandorasbox21 · 11/10/2011 13:57

What you are sayig is totally normal. Nurseries wont recieve payment for the college students for this term until mid-late november even though they started in sept. Its how it works on schemes such as care to learn etc. They will then pay you a block amount

mummymeister · 11/10/2011 14:27

Child minding is a job - just like being a plumber or working in a shop but unfortunately parents will play on the fact that you do this because you like children. sadly you have to harden up and get tougher with your terms and conditions or people will take the pi** out of you. that pay you what they owe you before you take the children that you have in - simple as. stand at the door, ask for it and don't let them in until they do. then you need to get some good t and c's down for your business and make all parents sign and agree to them before you take their kids on. things like payment 7 days in advance or on the XXth of the month etc. sorry but you have to really toughen up to make people realise that you need this money to live on. they wouldnt do their tesco's shop and only pay for half of it at the checkout would they.

pigletmania · 11/10/2011 15:30

I personally would give the parents notice when to pay and terminate if They don't pay by that date in full. If you do get new parents make sure their not in the care to work scheme if you need paying monthly

troisgarcons · 11/10/2011 15:35

Personally I'd tell them to sling their hook and start action in the small calims court.

I wouldnt give up childminding though - but you have to lay down the ground rules. I' always paid a month up front and because I hated carrying round several hundred pounds in cash, I did it by standing order on payday.

OTheHugeWerewolef · 11/10/2011 16:12

Don't give up, OP. mummymeister is right - it's a job, and these people are taking advantage of your natural kindness and sympathy for the difficulties of parents and childcare. You're not a charity, though - this is your living, and you need to get tough on them. Others have posted some great advice - Ts and Cs, refusing to take children whose parents haven't paid, payment in advance and so on.

I've not done a childminder training, but I imagine there's lots in there about complying with the early years curriculum, being safe, caring for children etc but not much about making sure you get paid. Maybe if you think of this as part of learning to do the job properly - teaching yourself to be firm about money - you won't feel so down.

maypole1 · 11/10/2011 16:27

To be honest I would have never allowed a child trough my front door on a Monday morning with out payment

They would had to pay me then chase the collage for their money

I usually asked for a weeks payment in advance or sadly my services would not be available

tablefor3 · 11/10/2011 17:09

MaryPoppinsMagic

Please do write to the college. The technical term is inducing a breach of contract; it is unlawful. That should stop them in the their tracks.

Table

[makes mental note to re-start DDs' nursery DD!]

controlpantsandgladrags · 11/10/2011 17:14

we pay our childminder a month in advance. If we pay late we are charged a late fee. If we didn't pay she wouldn't take DD. Don't do anything if you haven't been paid for it.

laptopdancer · 11/10/2011 18:24

No offence but its because you didt set the ground rules and pricing policy first. When i used a cm we had to pay each month in advance.

PurpleCrazyHorse · 11/10/2011 19:30

Our CM is paid a month in arrears and she gives us an invoice in week 3 of the month for payment by the end of the month. Late payment induces a late fee of £10. I'm sure if we didn't pay for the previous month, she would turn away DD at the door and fill her space with someone else. I think you have to be that ruthless. Personally, I wouldn't be doing extra hours etc in the first few months, keep to the contracted hours and see how they go.

I think you need to look at your contract and get it watertight for the next lot of parents. Get some NCMA advise and ditch both sets of parents and get advertising for more children. You'll find some great families but you will come across those who take the mick, you just need a clear procedure for getting rid of them quickly to minimise the financial impact.

rhondajean · 11/10/2011 20:51

Oh Mary you have had an awful time!!

i think you really need to start thinking of this as a business. You are providing someone with a service; it is as simple as that. That the service is something as personal and emotive as taking care of their children is of no matter.

If you used a service provided by another business - say, got on a bus, or went into a gym, they would want you to pay up front and would be perfectly entitled to do so, and refuse you to use their service if you didnt.

I think I advised before that you write down everything that you need on an information sheet (prices, payment times, hours you work, school pickups, and also some nice stuff, food, activities, any pets etc) and give each parent it. Sorry if that was someone else but you really need to do that, and stick to your guns, demand payment, if you dont get it, you dont provide the service, quality childcare is like hens teeth so make them treat you well too!

Unless you are hating childminding - in which case give up!

aquashiv · 11/10/2011 22:08

Who told you the college said this? If its the late paying Mother I would take it with a pinch of salt she is trying to hold you over a barrel. Get rid these people are not respecting you. I agree a great childminder is like gold dust like any new enterprise you are coming up against teething trouble if you enjoy what you do and enjoy looking after the children then stick with it. You have learnt a valuable lesson here regarding payments.

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