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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I pulled my MN judgy pants on and up high for the first real time today :o)

49 replies

TheLadyEvenstar · 09/10/2011 21:54

Went with family including 7 children to a huge indoor play area.
Disabled toilets - working
Boys - working
Girls - working.

I took DS2 4 to the toilet as the others were all playing to be faced with a queue and a child of about 8 who had been stripped naked, sat on the sink and was being washed down I am assuming it was his mum with him.

Now while I am the first normally to understand that some children have SN and therefore require extra care there was a perfectly working disabled toilet which was vacant as you had to get the key before using it.

Mum then left the boy sitting there while she dried his clothes - or rather his t-shirt which was wet.

I managed not to say "you could have used the disabled toilet meaning we could have washed our hands" and ushered DS2 out and got the key for the disabled toilet.

OP posts:
NorfolkBroad · 09/10/2011 22:19

My dd would be mortified if I "stripped her down" in a public loo with people coming in and out. I hate it when people do this with their kids without consideration for their feelings. UGH.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 09/10/2011 22:20

Spook, it wasn't nice to see little girls as I say from little to teens walking in and out. I felt awful for him.

OP posts:
BatsUpMeNightie · 09/10/2011 22:21

Ok LES. We get it. Now get over it and move on will you? Because really, you know, if was none of your business anyway!

NorfolkBroad · 09/10/2011 22:22

No, but it made her feel very uncomfortable as it does me just thinking about it. Poor kid.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 09/10/2011 22:22

Norfolk, I have not done it with either of mine. I have changed their tops in public and last week tried DS2's new school trousers on over his already worn shorts but I wouldn't undress them in full view - I just don't think it would be fair to them. (Well ds1 13 would probably think I had lost it and DS2 would leg it)

OP posts:
Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 09/10/2011 22:23

Bats, you don't have to read.

I am having a conversation - it is allowed you know.

OP posts:
HeidiKat · 09/10/2011 22:35

YABU if you don't know the circumstances, it may have been urgent to get him cleaned up and his mum had no time to go and get the key to the locked disabled toilet. And there was another sink in the toilets just at a lower level, is there a reason I'm not familiar with that your DS couldn't have bent down to wash his hands at this sink?

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 09/10/2011 22:39

Heidi - I already said it was being used.

I took DS2 to another toilet where he washed his hands.

OP posts:
HeidiKat · 09/10/2011 22:48

Wouldn't have killed him to wait his turn would it? Sounds like you are making a mountain out of a molehill, I'm sure the child who was being washed had good reason behind it, surely nobody would do that in a public place on a whim, and if they had used the disabled loo there would be a chorus of people damning them for doing so when it may have been needed for someone in a wheelchair.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 09/10/2011 23:01

Heidi, I left more for the fact that the child look terribly embarrassed and I had no desire to stand there.

OP posts:
AmberLeaf · 09/10/2011 23:07

She probably didnt realise the accident whatever it was until they got in there, so under those circumstances it wouldnt have made sense to come out and go into the disabled toilet. she just got on with it.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 09/10/2011 23:09

Amber, I did say further up maybe that was the case.

As I have said I just felt for the boy he looked embarrassed.

OP posts:
CannibalBitsArrrgh · 09/10/2011 23:23

I would be fucking mortified if I was an 8 yr old boy being stripped naked for a washdown if I had soiled myself irrespective of special needs or not

How awful for that little boy to be embarrassed like that! Regardless whether it be a parent or a carer - a change should be be done in private!

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 09/10/2011 23:33

Cannibal - which is all I was saying - albeit badly.

OP posts:
hmc · 09/10/2011 23:39

Perhaps the mum wasn't thinking straight because frankly, your 8 year old peeing themselves in a soft play area in front of other potentially judgy parents is a bit of a nightmare and likely to leave you feeling more than a little bit flustered

Floggingmolly · 09/10/2011 23:40

Jesus TheLadyEvenstar, you're getting it in the neck again! You have a perfectly valid point, it sounds hugely embarrassing and undignified.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 09/10/2011 23:48

HMC, she was drying a t-shirt no other clothes.

Flogging, it wasn't nice to see a young boy embarrassed

OP posts:
Floggingmolly · 10/10/2011 00:01

I know, I just meant everyone's ganging up to say UABU (and you're not!)

MrsSleepy · 10/10/2011 06:56

She may have been only drying the t-shirt when you walked in but may have already dried his trousers, pants etc before hand

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 10/10/2011 09:42

Yes, Mrs thats quite possible however IF you had dried pants before t-shirt wouldn't you have put them on your child to save them some embarrassment?

OP posts:
Putrifyno · 10/10/2011 09:45

Sounds like a big fuss about nothing to me.

grubbalo · 10/10/2011 09:53

I'd just add that if she'd used the disabled loo for a child who sounds like he wasn't actually disabled, there would have probably been about 5 threads on here by now about it...

PinotScreechio · 10/10/2011 10:00

Ohhhhhhh sometimes MN is just so crabby!

VampiresWearBlackVelvet · 10/10/2011 10:08

Moral of this story.

Always take a change of clothes out Grin

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