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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

<gulp> my first serious AIBU before I storm the staff room...

81 replies

PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 07/10/2011 15:42

Disclaimer: This is not a joke, I seriously want to know if IABU before I speak with the teacher on monday.
DDs class are doing their showing assembly next friday and DD is "the werewolf" - so far so good, they're doing the story of "Big Black Riding Hoodie".
DD brought a copy of the script home tonight, and the narrator child has to say (twice, once quietly and then again loudly) "It's the fat and ugly werewolf" as DD makes her appearance from "behind a tree". AIBU to think that "hairy scary werewolf" or "big fanged wild eyed werewolf" or "Riding Hoodie eating werewolf" would be better than "fat and ugly"?
Those are words that should not be uttered in school, let alone meant to be funny and/or entertaining and scripted by the teacher. There are one or two really big kids at the school who are seriously overweight, and even if they were all as thin as rakes, I just don't think "fat and ugly" should be bandied about. Or am I just being precious?
I will be speaking to the teacher on monday, even if IABU I can be as unreasonable as the next person when I want but I wondered if anyone else would feel this was "iffy" or if it is just me. sometimes things are Just Me, I don't always have the same reactions as other people to stuff so I'm never quite sure

OP posts:
stepawayfromtheecclescakes · 07/10/2011 17:39

I have no problem with the title if its a reference to the big black hoodie the lead character is wearing as long as the rest of the script has no racial overtones and street gang caricaturing, does not sound like it so far, the word black, and hoodies are relevant words that do not need to provoke Shock if used in the proper context

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 07/10/2011 17:40

I'm obviously out of touch Confused as a gang thing never occurred to me - maybe because we're in a small town and don't have gangs. There's a bit of rivalry between schools sometimes, and some drunken punch ups outside pubs, but not gangs as such like there are in big cities.
If it makes a difference (not drip-feeding or whatever it's called, it just didn't occur to me it might be relevant before) the grandma is a vampire, and the mum is a witch and has a Big Black Cauldron and makes potions in it. The main character is called Big Black. At the end it's Granny who gets the axe and chops the werewolf up and they eat him Hmm
I just read it really carefully, and they say "mean werewolf" too - nothing on its own, but a bit more on top of the fat and ugly thing I think.

OP posts:
DandyLioness · 07/10/2011 17:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

stepawayfromtheecclescakes · 07/10/2011 17:47

pombear keep a sensible head, its possible to over analyse and read Shock into everything, if it fits the plot and is in proper context then its probably not offensive, stick to the really obviuos stuff and don't panic. as I said earlier... enjoy

DandyLioness · 07/10/2011 17:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Vallhala · 07/10/2011 17:51

Oh ruddy Nora, some people will go looking for something to be offended about!

Big BLACK Riding Hoodie?

Well bugger me, the werewolf is black! Just as they are so frequently depicted. Shock, horror, whatever next!

The title does not say Big Black Man or Woman Riding Hoodie or Black People Wear Hoodies and Must Therefore Be Very Nasty - it's referring to a ruddy ficticious werewolf FGS!

iwasyoungonce · 07/10/2011 17:52

yanbu

Vallhala · 07/10/2011 17:55

Can I complain about the animal abuse in the OP's story?

I've just sent this over to a Black friend. He came back to me quick as a flash with,

"Far too much time on their hands babe, how many of the people objecting are actually BLACK????"

RedHelenB · 07/10/2011 17:59

If the kids have written it themselves then what do you expect? Traditional tales do have ugly people as baddies & all the goodies are beautiful!

stepawayfromtheecclescakes · 07/10/2011 18:01

valhala not sure what ethnicity you are has anything to do with it, if a white person thinks something is racist they should address it Hmm but I don't think this is in that category (see earlier comment)

GumballCharm · 07/10/2011 18:17

It's making light of the negative connotations that gangs have...particularly gangs that wear hoodies.

And it seems to be suggesting something racial too....

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 07/10/2011 18:20

I have stopped worrying about the Big Black Hoodie - as long as it preserves the modesty of the child wearing it Grin and am going to try and catch Miss B in the playground on monday morning. If I miss her, I am going to tell Nice Secretary all about it (I wonder if she groans when she sees parents bearing down on her little glass window hatch looking all serious) and maybe mention it at parent's evening or put it in writing, depending what the Secretary says. The Head's office is right beside hers, and he lurks behind his door and listens when parents come to the office he thinks we don't know this so he might "just happen to pop out" and have a word himself. He is usually very good with ishoos... fingers crossed they just go for "hary scary" and have done with it :)
I shall report back on monday...

OP posts:
GumballCharm · 07/10/2011 18:48

I wouldn't tell the secretary...I would aproach the teacher.

stepawayfromtheecclescakes · 07/10/2011 18:58

does the nice secretary have nice ham in her lunchtime sarnies?

DandyLioness · 07/10/2011 19:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

stepawayfromtheecclescakes · 07/10/2011 19:50

hear hear dandylioness

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 07/10/2011 19:58

She's Nice Secretary to distinguish her from Bitch Secretary but don't tell anyone I call her that Wink

OP posts:
stepawayfromtheecclescakes · 07/10/2011 20:03

Grin pombear my lips are sealed

TimeWasting · 07/10/2011 20:15

It isn't the werewolf that is 'black' though is it, it's the protagonist.

MrMan · 07/10/2011 22:40

Ok I have to get this out there. Am I the only one seeing 'riding' as a verb in the title?

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 07/10/2011 23:23

Um, they're a class of 9 year olds MrMan, so I rather think you probably are, yes.

OP posts:
razors · 07/10/2011 23:26

I was bit Hmm at the black hoodie bit too - I'd mention that as well.

TethHearseEnd · 07/10/2011 23:29

YANBU.

I think abseiling through the (closed) staffroom window may be more apporpriate, given the circumstances.

Faffalina · 07/10/2011 23:39

The black hoodie reference might sound odd, but they are just talking about what "red riding hood" is wearing. In this case, not a red hood but a black hoodie.

manicinsomniac · 08/10/2011 07:21

I don't think it's a huge issue but I don't think you're being totally unreasonable and you could have a word with the teacher if you feel strongly about it.

I'm a drama teacher for 9-13 year olds. I wouldn't stop the children if they used a phrase like 'fat and ugly' to describe a character in a play they had made up themselves and performed in the classroom. However, I probably would suggest a modification if it was for public performance and I certainly wouldn't write it in myself. Not sure why I make those distinctions but I'm fairly sure that would be my angle.

'Big Black Riding Hoodie' - I think it's fine depending on context. It wouldn't even occur to any of the little rural middle class innocents I teach that a black hoodie could represent anything other than a piece of clothing.

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