To think MIL is just taking the piss now.

[chaosisawayoflife]

I'll preface this by saying my MIL is a fantastic grandmother, adores my dds and would do anything for them. She is a very strong character though and winds me up, but I try to have a reasonable relationship with her for the sake of dd and dh.
So, MIL knows I like to feed dd1 a reasonably healthy diet and minimise junk food and sweets etc for treats only. She has always spoiled dd and given her things that I don't necessarily agree with, but I usually let this go and I know she just wants to spoil her and make sure that Nanny will always be her favourite.
Anyway, dd1 stayed overnight at MILs and I went to pick her up, getting there at 8.15 in the morning. MIL proudly listed what dd had had so far that morning. She is 3.6. She'd had a cup of tea, a bowl of sugar coated shreddies, a kit kat yoghurt, a fruit bar thing of some sort, a packet of crisps, a packet of chocolate buttons and 2 biscuits! All before 8.15am! That's not normal, is it? AIBU to think the only reason she is doing that is to wind me up and to exert her control over things? Surely no one could possibly think that is a reasonable breakfast for a 3yo ffs!

OP- do we share a MIL?! Mine does the same, Ive caught her at it. I'll nip to the loo in a cafe and come back to find my 9 month old DD with frosting around her mouth! The woman is crazy though. I had to tell her off when DD was 8 weeks old after I caught her whispering in her ear that "Mummy doesnt love you like grandma does, only grandma loves you"... COOKOO!

Shes stopped that now, but I ignore the sly peices of cupcake as its not to serious. Shes aware that if she cocks up big time, she just wont see DD again.

Yeah, we have a weird love/hate relationship.

The tea wouldn't bother me as I've been drinking it since I was about 6 months old or so (and never had a problem with iron levels) but loads of sweets etc can't be a good idea.

i have seen children and adults pile in that much crap or more and never once has anyone said oh i feel sick and it is too much lol.

case in point every birthday party with a selection of crap to choose from

my advice is to calm down and chill. when i was a child at easter i would eat way too much chocolate before 9am. didn't kill me or ruin my health.

The food thing, not great but like you say, not worth fighting about. The sexy comments- I am afraid I would have to say something.

My dad used to wolf whistle at my DS, even when he was a baby, and I had to repeatedly tell him to stop. What got him was I said, what if we are out and you wolf whistle and you can an earful from a woman on the street who thinks you are doing it to her, you would be so embarassed. He did stop then.

YANBU. My MIL is the same. I get that she wants to spoil the grandchildren and all that, but I know that some of it is done to exert control and wind DH and myself up.

She's said things to me like "DS is ever so loyal to you. It didn't matter how hard I tried to persuade him he wouldn't eat "

On the rare occasion she's had him on a teacher training day, I've sent him round to hers with a packed lunch so she doesn't have to go to the effort of feeding him, and he's come home with that in tact having eaten nothing all day but crisps, biscuits and chocolate. On one occasion following this, he was too full to eat his tea and then threw up. So it was excessive.

She's admitted that she does it because she thinks we're stuck up. We're not at all, but she needs firmer boundaries than the children do! At least they understand what they are and remember them. Unless they're reiterated to her at every visit she thinks they no longer apply.

She does love them, but chooses to demonstrate it through food.

Slightly off topic - a KitKat youhurt? That exists? What abominable mind would invent that?

In my case it's my owm mother. She's obsessed with giving my daughter chocolate Buttons beacuse 'she never gets treats at home'. Apart from the fact that that's not true, it's strange ebcause when I was a kid my mam was years ahead of her time with healthy eating and not using food as treats. I just have to suck it up though, she'll do it sneakiky if I try and ban it, so my 16 month old already knows where Nanny keeps the Buttons and I pretend it's not happenening.