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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think that 'Mummy's Room' is a little sexist and dated?

51 replies

MummyBuzz · 01/10/2011 20:58

Was shopping with DH and DD this week when we visited a 'Mothercare World' store and I was frustrated to see that the changing facilities had a sign on the door saying 'Mummy's Room'!

I am usually such a laid back person and nothing bothers me but this has. My DH is an incredible dad and is more than happy to change/feed our DD as I am sure many other Dads are out there, but even he agreed that by having a sign on the door saying Mummy's Room it is a bit sexist and very dated. Didn't say anything to the staff in the store but beginning to wonder if I should have, not to complain but just to see if they'd consider changing their signage?! AIBU or just spending to much time and energy worrying about the trivial?!

OP posts:
BatsUpMeNightie · 01/10/2011 21:37

If it's not it bloody well should be!

ScarahStratton · 01/10/2011 21:37
BatsUpMeNightie · 01/10/2011 21:38

That is actually an offence Scarah. Perhaps if you did it a little less salaciously?

ScarahStratton · 01/10/2011 21:39

Sorry Blush

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 01/10/2011 21:41

And I shall dribble noodles down my chin whilst mouthing 'what the actual fuck'. Shock

pinkyp · 01/10/2011 21:42

Yabu! It's only sexist if that's what you want to see. My dh would see it as bf room and ask a member if staff. I've bf (shock horror I feed my baby how nature intended) in these rooms before which is why they prob get there name 'mummy's room' from.

ScarahStratton · 01/10/2011 21:43
AmazingBouncingFerret · 01/10/2011 21:48

hey now, hey now, let us not turn this into a Bf/FF bunfight... it's a room. it has chairs in it. It has changing mats in it. It has a little bottle warmer for FF in it. It can be used by anyone.

pinkyp · 01/10/2011 21:52

But that's what it's for feeding!

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 01/10/2011 21:53

I ordered too much yet again Blush

Daisy1986 · 01/10/2011 21:54

In my local store (Norwich) the Mummy's Room just has some Nursing Chairs and water machine and the room next door has toilets and changing area.

Personally I love the fact that Mothercare provide for nursing Mothers as in the early days most don't like feeding in public.

It annoys me when shops like my local supermarket for example has one changing room which doubles as a feeding room. So if someone locks the door for a longish feed you cant get in to change your little one.

Pan · 01/10/2011 21:54

"I am usually a laid back person" - OP

I do doubt that you are, really.

Theala · 01/10/2011 22:11

No, you're not. It really is very sexist and dated. MudderFUCK.

NotJustKangaskhan · 01/10/2011 22:31

Perhaps a little dated - all the ones I see are either Baby room or Parent Room. I'd only find it sexist if they actively barred men from using it - which happens. My local Boots did this with their Baby room, my husband had baby and nappy bag and told me he was going to go change her and a staff member sprinted down the aisle to the door to block him, told him off said he should have asked staff if he could be supervised while using the room to prevent anyone being uncomfortable Hmm. We haven't really bothered with them since.

minimisschief · 02/10/2011 00:08

As a dad i do not see what the big deal is tbh

Pan · 02/10/2011 00:14

I think the big deal isabout the space being a possible breast-feeding space. I could be wrong.

shergar · 02/10/2011 00:16

Hmmm, I think YABU. Tbh, I think a man probably would be uncomfortable in a breastfeeding room (and could make a new mother who was looking for somewhere private/a female environment to do so uncomfortable), so possibly best to find somewhere else to bottlefeed a baby than go there. Don't think I'd have liked men wandering in if I was BFing in the early weeks in a room labelled for mothers, but I appreciate I was a hormonal oversensitive lunatic who was permanently on the verge of a meltdown about finding BFing impossible anyway. I wouldn't have cared about a strange woman who came in to bottlefeed though. If that makes me sexist then too bad: it IS worse getting boobs out in front of strange men than in front of strange women.

Himalaya · 02/10/2011 00:27

It's a bit twee (and a crime against apostrophes too). Presumably they mean breastfeeding room (and should just call it that) - I guess they have changing facilities in the men's and women's toilets.

I used to hate breastfeeding in a room with a stinky bin full of festering nappies and people waiting impatiently/coming in and out to change nappies.

There's no need to be offended that there is a breastfeeding room for women and children only. I don't think it's a slight against dads or people using formula - just a recognition that new breastfeeding mums can be a bit sensitive about going 'open plan' with their boobs in public.

MilyP · 02/10/2011 01:18

Don't think it really matters does it? DP and I used one the other day and can honestly say neither of us noticed what it was called. Door was open, DP went in and changed DD and then I came in and fed.

If there are changing facilities there then I don't think anyone would mind a man coming in to change their child even if they were bf. I was in a small changing room and needed to feed and another dad needed to change their little one, which I thought was fine.

You could call it a feeding room but then that some how seems more wrong - making me think of troughs and farmyards

LeBOF · 02/10/2011 01:28

How about "Babycare"?

MilyP · 02/10/2011 02:06

For the room or the shop? Or both?

SurreyDad · 02/10/2011 06:57

The problem with calling it a Mummys Room is it isn't clear what it is. Is it a breastfeeding area, a changing room for women, or a sexist name for a baby changing room?

The sign should state clearly what the room is for to prevent misinterpretaion.

itisnearlysummer · 02/10/2011 07:14

MilyP Totally agree with you!

I assumed it's a room for addressing baby needs. It probably is a bit dated and twee to call it the Mummies Room or Mummy's Room or whatever but... when my DCs were little and I went in there to BF or change them it was predominantly occupied by women!

I didn't ever mind a dad coming in with a baby if I was BF. I'm guessing that if a man has a baby with him, he's probably seen boobs before at some point and that it won't come as a shock to him what boobs are for. We're all there for the same thing - to look after our babies.

rogersmellyonthetelly · 02/10/2011 07:58

Yanbu, not because it's sexist but beause it's so fecking twee
they do need to have a separate area for bf I think, because we need to accommodate both those who bf and those who ff, and mums of newborns who are bf and a bit shy need privacy, and blokes need to be able to change/feed their children without being embarrassed or uncertain about what they will see when they walk in. This is not to do with men finding bf distasteful, or any such thing, but simply that when a woman is feeding and is struggling to latch baby on, and a man walks in, the woman may be uncomfortable about how much is on show, and the bloke would be uncomfortable because she is embarrassed iyswim.
They need a baby care area, and a specific bf room for women only, or a separate area within it for bf.
Pmsl at open plan boobs though!

cleanteeth · 02/10/2011 08:08

I can see what you mean OP. It's the sort of thing that I would see and be a tad peeved by but then forget about it 10 minutes later.

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