AIBU to think that "playground mummies" are a fact of life?

[Joolsy]

...What I mean is, since DD1 started school 3 years ago I have fallen out (and back in again) with 3 mummies. My SIL seems to think these things are a given and it's best to just accept it and not take it to heart as it will happen every now and then for whatever reason. This latest episode involves the mother of a girl in DD1's class who has ignored me for the past 5 months due to something DD1 was accused of saying to her DD (nothing was proven and the girls were friends again the next day!). I've now found out she's been talking about me to some of the other mums. Shouldn't let a stupid woman like that get to me but it has. Again. Hmmm.....

On friendly terms with lots of school mums. Never fallen out with anyone.

No, not a fact of life at all.

I have never had a fall out with parents of my dd's friends.

Mind you, it helps that I don't actually have a 'mummy friendship' with any of them.

I've been a 'playground mum' for almost 17 years and never fallen out with anyone.

My mu worked full time, so never collected me..actually nobodies mums collected them after they were 8.

I've never fallen out with anyone on the playground, and if I did, I wouldn't fall back in with them again.

I have seen some cat fights, though. Nice middle class suberbia, and always mothers fighting about "your DD not playing with my DD"

Changed schools and the biggest disagreement I've heard is; "look you two girls haven't spoken for 3 days, this is silly now, you need to make friends" with 2 mothers looking nervously at each other.

If another mummy is bitching about you, you need to get on the playground first. You need to be in with the in mums with the gossip. You are no one on the playground otherwise.

Whilst I have never fallen out with any of the mums in the playground/gates, I have witnessed feuds which have lasted for years, bitchy looks, downright glares and nasty comments. There are two gates to my dc's school - and I swear its a kind of turf war. The decent parents no longer hang around for longer than need be and some (like me) dont go at all.
Grown adults behaving like children - ignore OP. Not worth it. Laughable really.

I really don't know how people can be bothered with all this playground crap. I drop my kids off at school and leave. Couldn't care less who talks to me or not.

In the late seventies at my school I remember two mums having a proper fight!!!! This was a socially deprived area in the North-East on England though!

At my Dc's (nice middle class) school, there are cliques ! I'd say I was a Beta rather than alpha mummy). I'm nice to everyone as long as they are decent people I've not fallen out with anyone (yet).

And this is why I operated 'dump and run' as soon as the DDs were old enough. Moving on to chucking out of the car and park and wait in the afternoons.

I'd be upset too, but I agree it's ridiculous and pathetic for grown adults to ignore one another and bitch behind people's backs. Can you bring yourself to confront her? Otherwise find some nicer friends, you don't need people like that.

I'm with CogitoErgoSometimes on this - in spirit if not the flesh of day-to-day interactions. I'm working on my implacability and oiling my feathers morning and night. Bon chance.

I've long since opted out of all the playground politics. I turn up, pick up the kids, and go. Sure, I've made some friends through school, but I don't get involved in any of the cliquey, coffee morning stuff.

I am freindly, but they are not my friends. HUGE difference

You actually talk to them???[gein]

I just don't get this stuff.

Surely, you exchange pleasantries about the weather and have an idle chat at the school gate, then you get your kids and go hang out with your friends.

A couple of women I met at DS1's first school have become great friends, but mostly it was all polite nods and smiles, and then move on.

What are you people doing to get so involved with each other?

They exist, are common but are not at every school gate, and the game is usually securing best playdates/ parties/ perks for PDC. Best strategy is to move fast with a benign smile and avoid, ignore, evade all attempts to get you involved.