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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To Warn DDs local School…...

24 replies

rockinhippy · 28/09/2011 12:29

About our lovely Neighbour who was last seen shaking his manhood proudly in his front, net free, ground level, directly onto pavement - window Hmm

I had a call from a friend who works locally, warning me for DDs sake & to get house number to report him - he is a VERY close neighbour - he was still at it probably an hour later when I passed on my way homeShock - I banged on his window - instead of running & hiding he stepped closer to the windowShockAngry

I have also reported him to the Police, but now wondering if I should also warn DDS School - or would that jus seem barking mad - Confused - many of the parents cut through our road after School on their way to a local supermarket - & the window is eye level to a lot of DCs

????????

Thanks

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belledechocchipcookie · 28/09/2011 12:32

No, you've contacted the Police, that should be enough.

GypsyMoth · 28/09/2011 12:33

Is thus something he just started doing today?

rockinhippy · 28/09/2011 12:36

yes, tiffany I think so - he's probably a new neighbour ( I wasn't going to look so closely as to see if I recognised him) - its a student house, so very likely a new college/uni year intake

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rockinhippy · 28/09/2011 12:36

thanks belle

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belledechocchipcookie · 28/09/2011 12:37

He could be unwell, an illness in older folk makes them do very odd things. I really wouldn't contact the local school.

rockinhippy · 28/09/2011 12:39

belle - funny I always thought this sort of thing was a "dirty old mans" "sport" too - but the guy is young - my friend put him down as early 20s - I would think so tooConfused

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belledechocchipcookie · 28/09/2011 12:41

Hmm. He could still be unwell. Mental illness has no age barriers. The police will sort him out.

rockinhippy · 28/09/2011 12:42

I should add - from past experience ( flashed at & followed years ago by a high profile odd ball, as was another friend) - though the Police DO take this sort of stuff seriously - they don't really do enough about it to put off the types that do it - IYSWIM

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belledechocchipcookie · 28/09/2011 12:44

If the police think it's necessary to notify the school then they will do this. They will probably contact the community mental health team and the university. Poor lad, sounds like he really needs help.

rockinhippy · 28/09/2011 12:44

X posted - agree belle but whatever his reasons I still wouldn't want DD to see it

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belledechocchipcookie · 28/09/2011 12:46

True, I just don't think it's your place to tell the school. The police should do this. I can understand your intention, I really can. It's a tricky one though.

Birdsgottafly · 28/09/2011 12:49

If the police have not been, then at the moment it is your word against his and could be classed as slander, if you approach the school.

I would contact the police again, did you get a log number?

He may not be mentally ill (in the sense that most people understand it).

kelly2000 · 28/09/2011 12:54

I would tell the school - you are are under no duty not to, so why not? He flaps his penis around in the front window where children will see him, he can hardly claim you are breaching his confidentiality by telling the school. Think of it this way, if children see it and are upset, how will you feel not having told the school. You could also try contacting social services to ask their advice if you are unsure. The council would also give you advice as this is anti-social behvaiour.
I would also tell the police school children pass through there. If you know the company that rents the house it you should also complain to them about their tennants.

pyjamasinbananas · 28/09/2011 12:56

I would tell the school. I wouldn't want my kids or me to see strange penises flapping in people's windows!!

MollyTheMole · 28/09/2011 12:56

YANBU, if it was me I think Id have to have a bit of an off the record word with the HT just incase the police dont do much about it.

Probably not a very popular view but I'll say it anyway - I dont think Id care if he was mentally ill, he shouldnt be waving his knob infront of school children and it needs sorting. Disclaimer - One of my neighbours (he had MH issues, not sure what though) used to do this from his bedroom window at me and my mates when we were kids and once he tried to drag one of our classmates into his house so this is probably jading my view somewhat.

worraliberty · 28/09/2011 12:59

I could have written this thread myself a few years ago.

The police will need as many reports as they can get so tell the school, and ask them to advise parents to phone the police if they witness him doing this.

The flasher in the next road to me became very sneaky but they took it so seriously in the end that they put plain clothes police officers in a car just down the road to his house...and eventually he flashed at a female officer.

Inertia · 28/09/2011 13:01

I'd warn the HT and let them know that you've informed the police. The HT can then liaise with the police about whether the school should / could do anything to warn parents.

OhYouBadBadKitten · 28/09/2011 13:20

I'd report it to the police each time you are ware of it happening. If your dd does see it then I'd have a quiet word with her teacher as once she tells her class mates then school chinese whispers can produce some very odd results.

rockinhippy · 28/09/2011 13:21

Thanks Birds - I took your advice & DID ring the Police back & voice my concerns over the School kids passing later - turns out there has been several complaints, not just me & my friend & the Police have been round, "had a word" & are dealing with it "slow time" (??)- on the PCs advice I HAVE just let the School office know & the HT will decide what to do for best from there.

Got to admit, I too am of the train of thought, that where as I feel for someone with MH issues, that sympathy doesn't run as far as letting that sympathy clouding protecting any DCs - MH or not, I would probably swing for the guy if he did it to my own DD & yes I would have felt awful if any of my DDs School mates saw & were upset by him,

so on that note feel I've done the right thing :)

Thanks to you all for you advice & helping me make that decision :)

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belledechocchipcookie · 28/09/2011 13:22

I'm pleased it's getting sorted. The police were lazy for not contacting the school though.

OhYouBadBadKitten · 28/09/2011 13:23

cool - glad you have it sorted :)

worraliberty · 28/09/2011 13:28

The flasher round the corner to me was a young guy with mental health issues. He was schitzophrenic and a heroin addict.

The thing is, he became so sneaky that any time he was up in court (he was a convicted burglar too) he used to check himself in to his mental health unit so it took over a year to catch and convict him.

The police told me, he played the system like fiddle when they arrested him too.

rockinhippy · 28/09/2011 13:31

belle you're right, but I'm wondering that as the School isn't actually that near - several blocks away & not the most residential area, that its just not occurred to them Confused - but the supermarket IS the closest to the School & its main catchment area, so like myself many parents do pick up their kids & pop into the supermarket & pick up supplies for tea - & our Street is the main route between the 2 - though I'll be taking DD the back route from here onwards - I'm not liking the sound of "slow time" Policing - I think that may have been the route taken in the past & that took someone being murdered before anything was actually doneHmm

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caughtinanet · 28/09/2011 13:33

Glad you've got it sorted.

Only on MN would I hear anyone whose first thought would be to be sympathetic to the man because he might have MH issues. Whilst that may be the case isn't it more important to think practically to ensure our daughters aren't unnecessarily upset.

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