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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be envious that my neighbour lives in a council house........

304 replies

EnviousEvie · 28/09/2011 10:04

and pays £600 a month less than me for the exact same bloody house (her's is nicer inside) next door to mine?

Difference is hers is a council house, mine is a private rental. The owner of mine bought it from the council and now rents it out while he lives in a 4 bed detached house in a nicer part of town. We pay £950 a month, neighbour pays council £350 a month (3 bed terrace). We had to move here after selling our house last year because DH lost his job and we needed to release the small amount of equity we had to pay the bills we were behind on because we were terrified of being in debt. Our rent is now £150 a month higher than our mortgage was.

We struggle every bloody month and live on 'value' food. We are not entitled to housing benefit (DH now working again after a year, I work part time - 3DCs). Neighbour's DH is an accountant so she can afford not to work at all. That £600 would make a massive difference in our lives but we have not got a chance in hell of getting a council house. There are over 5000 people on the waiting list in my area. We are on the list but have been told that it could be over 5 years before we have a chance. Love my neighbour to bits but can't help feeling pissed off about it!

AIBU to think that this is bloody unfair?

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 28/09/2011 18:22

so where will they put all the elderly council Tenants then?

Thingumy · 28/09/2011 18:22

In the gutter where they belong usual,obvious innit Hmm

oksonowwhat · 28/09/2011 18:22

If you have MH issues EnviousE have you not thought about contacting Housing Associations specialising in homes for vulnerable people with mental health problems? Thats my line of work actually.

Sevenfold · 28/09/2011 18:23

"My DC has a SN as well FFS but I don't bleat about it to get sympathy."

lovely,

PeachyWhoCannotType · 28/09/2011 18:23

US mum and dad were offerd a one bed place on a 'new village'

They actually quite liked the idea, just not the fact that they would have to pack in Dad's job to take it up! Long term if tehy need care though they will move in with my sister (and those who know me- expect many threads, it's THAT sister LMAO)

ReindeerBollocks · 28/09/2011 18:24

Actually since I first posted on this thread, it has taken some what of a turn, thats my fault for typing slowly.

OP, please back off people with disabilities, it just makes you seem ignorant and quite over entitled.

And on that note, I think I should probably leave this thread before I lose my temper

PeachyWhoCannotType · 28/09/2011 18:26

Oh and OP

MH issues are really common when you have a child with SN: Dh ahs been through this and will be medicated for life, although seems much better now thank goodnes as we almost lost him. DH was ready to make the call for me to be sectioned last week as he was so scared but I hope I don't really need that, I was just tired, though it was a huge wake up to how much I am really struggling.

I don't know what SN your DC have: mine have versions of ASD and if tehre's anything I can help with (doing an MA in Autism and used to work for a major parenting charity) please do holler, what I don't know I will usuallu know someone who does IYKWIM- a great mate ahs severe Cp and does mentoring for people with PD for example.

ReindeerBollocks · 28/09/2011 18:27

Ooh thanks for asking MrsDV

DS was doing really well, had a great six weeks holiday and was progressing really well with his needle phobia - it has been less stressful recently when bloods are needed.

However, I have had a report back saying he really isn't well (worse than originally thought) so I'm a bit wobbly today, but I know we'll just step up and keep going. It is the way it's got to be.

Thanks for asking - Despite MNs reputation, it has some truly lovely people and you're one of them Mrs DV.

Flamingredhead · 28/09/2011 18:27

Envy

So if you don't Want sympathy why are you on here saying it is unfair . Sorry but it does sound like your jealous which is fine it is hard to be in private rented and have no stability but admit that rather than just bring plain dam right nasty

And how do yOu know if your neighbours have dc with Sn we dont wear a big sign you know

Oh and your the exact sort of person who is why I can not let it bd known to people RL that I'm getting a new build HA house after on the list less than 18 months and infact since came to HA attention I shot up and waited only 3 months ( plus build time ) as HA will get grief of people who will moan it's not fair

usualsuspect · 28/09/2011 18:27

My mum has a good support network where she lives ,she feels safe and knows the area

She has a spare room if we need to stay with her if shes ill etc

I think people forget council tenants are people too

you know ,just like your Mums and Dads

PeachyWhoCannotType · 28/09/2011 18:30

I know US; when Mum and dad go away the neighbours keep an eye on teh house, and they return that:important things as you age. it's a close community, when i go back I know most people, and my sisters live close by (neither in LA housing before anyone starts Wink) so whilst I am too far for emergencies they know they are safe, and Dad ahs had a few emergencies these apst few ears hence PT working not FT (he's pushing 70 but mum wants him out the house easily bored)

thefirstMrsDeVere · 28/09/2011 18:30

Reindeer I am so sorry to hear that things are not so good health wise Sad I am pleased he is doing well with his phobia though. What a brave boy he is. Such a credit to you bless him. Have a sneaky cuddle for your wobbliness.

I wasnt very lovely to the OP though....

Flamingredhead · 28/09/2011 18:31

You know what Evie sometimes life is shit but that's the way it goes . I would give up getting a house built for me if it meant I got my life back to what it was

But it won't happen so I'm going to enjoy my new house and be dam freatfull that you won't be my neighbour

thefirstMrsDeVere · 28/09/2011 18:32

to summarise

The OP is not against social housing
As long as its for her.

ReindeerBollocks · 28/09/2011 18:33

Usual, I used to work for a solicitors who defended cases for the elderly to stay in their homes, but the council normally had good alternatives, one bedroom self contained flats, with suitable access, which meant the Council normally had the Judgment in their favour.

If there isn't suitable alternative accommodation then there is little chance of the elderly being re housed. The Council never undertook a case where the alternative housing wasn't proper and correct for the persons needs - they would automatically lose, and it wasn't worth the loss in money for the Council.

hester · 28/09/2011 18:33

I agree with MrsDV. The housing system in this country is a complete mess, and just goes to show that some things should not be left to the vagaries of the free market.

So many people enduring horrible housing problems, and lashing out at each other - we'd be ok if it wasn't for the pensioners, the Eastern Europeans, the pregnant teenagers...

Flamingredhead · 28/09/2011 18:34

Yes a bad case of it's not fair .But life is not fair someone will always have something that you won't . Be that a new car a holiday a new house a bigger house or a pool

ReindeerBollocks · 28/09/2011 18:35

Thanks MrsDV, have had a bit of a cry and will be having Wine after a spectacularly bad day, but will be back on form tomorrow.

To be fair, the OP showed how she really thought, which deserved a bit of a bollocking straight talking Wink

PeachyWhoCannotType · 28/09/2011 18:35

I know Hester

Scared people lash out though don't they? And there are a LOT of people scared in the current financial climate

5inthebed · 28/09/2011 18:36

US, my MIL has a three bed house, she lives there by herself. She cannot look after it, she has the council come do the garden every month, I clean or her once a week and she finds it hard to manage the stairs. She was adamant she was only leaving there in a box, despite us asking her to move. She has lived there over 40 years, all her children grew up in that house. It took a very serious fall for her to decide that actually, she should move somewhere smaller. I know they are people, they do deserve to have a nice house, but it isn't their house, they dont own it and there are a lot of families living in overcrowded flats who are desperate for a house like hers. However, I wouldn;t like to see her placed somewhere she would not like, away from her family and with no support network. As it happens, she is moving to a lovely sheltered accomodation right near us. I know not everyone is as lucky to have this near them.

Op, nobody is bleating on about having a hild with SN, just giving their perspetives on HA houses. How rude of you!

AuntieMoanica · 28/09/2011 18:36

i think buying and selling of property has dehumanised actually living in a house.

TV is full of programmes telling you how to make the most money out of a property, it's never to fucking well live in is it? everywhere you turn there are 'how to make money out of your house' - makes my blood boil beyond

how can i rip the heart out of a community by making the very fabric of it into a money making scheme? is more like it.

some people can only think £s and $s when they see a house, not a jint of thought for the actual people who live in it.

it's very sad

usualsuspect · 28/09/2011 18:37

Its not just about the house though is it

Do you think it would be easy for a nearly 80 year old whos lived in her house for 30 odd years to just up and move?

PeachyWhoCannotType · 28/09/2011 18:40

That;'s it really 5 isn;t it?

Mum wants to stay in teh community she has lived in for pushing 40 years, that's her one requirement really. personally I think if they take away her garden she will rapidly decline (Mum is quite agoraphbic but gardens for hours every day) but that's not a factor anyone has ever used- though a reason for me to be grateful that she hasn't moved IYSWIM. I suspect if she does go as well Grandad will lose his arer and Sister will lose her job (complex- basically sister works nights and 48 hour shifts, BIL was made redundant 6 months ago and took the only job he was offered- 150 miles away, so lives there for weeks at a time).... none of that stops a family needing her house more, but it does give me a wide awareness of how wider communities are affected by housing IYSWIM, and how carefully these things need to be balanced

usualsuspect · 28/09/2011 18:41

and why is it just up to the council tenants to do their bit for this country's housing crisis?

All in it together?

Are we fuck

oksonowwhat · 28/09/2011 18:42

Most HA houses or Council Houses are on Estates of some kind. So why is EE going on and on about wanting one when in most of her posts she is mentioning people 'getting away from council estates and to better areas' Weird!!

Personally i don't think she knows what she wants she just wants whatever anyone else has got:)