MN Jury - AIBU To Go On Holiday Without My DD?!?

[Toodamnnosy]

Next year DD is in Year 11 (GCSE Year), we have been offered the chance to go to friends in US, in non-half term week for dd, but is half term for our ds.

My mum said 'Go and leave DD with me for the week, she loves staying with me'. This is true but I feel guilty going on holiday without her.

Extra info - she's going to Iceland for a week at Easter without us, we will have a holiday together in the Summer holidays.

Change of date is not an option. It's either without dd, or none of us go.

Two questions - are you taking DS? and does your DD want to go?
If the answer to both those questions is yes, then YABU not to take her, or to go without her.

If you're also leaving DS and DD and DS are happy to stay with their grandparents for the week, then no, YANBU.

Ds is 6 - he'd come with us.

Despite the large age gap the two of them adore each other. Ds will be out of sorts anyway being off school for the week with out his sister.

Due to his age he doesn't go away alone.

This year our dd has been on a week's skiing holiday and 2 weeks cadets without us and had a 2 week family holiday.

Next year, she'll have week in Iceland, 2 weeks of cadets, and 1 or 2 week family holiday. DS will just have the family holiday.

GCSEs not a worry then?

YANBU - go without her.

DD will say yes to anything If I said we are going to the states are you coming she'd say yes.

If I said we are going to US, but because you are in school and have already had Iceland this year, you are staying at Grandma's. She'd say ok.

She would get spoilt rotten at Grandma's (which I think is the right thing to happen )

GCSEs are a worry in as much as I won't allow her to miss any school time.

Down time she'll be fine - 5 weeks out of the whole year with no work, I'm not concerned by.

Good point Maryz if I said I was taking her suitcase empty to fill with trainers, hollister, Jack Wills and Ralph Lauren. Then I may be shoved out the door by her.

The grandma thing works. One of my pals is going to US with DH, without DD1 age 14 and DD2 age 7. I was a bit until I realised they loved being spoilt at grandma's. They are Genuinely Not Fussed because they think they can go to US another time. Interesting to find out how your DD feels about the plan?

Will the US trip be at a time when she is actually sitting her GCSEs - I think you're talking about a trip soon, right? If it were while she was actually taking exams, I'd want to be at home to support her and give her a normal home life - life at grandmas may be great but might not be exactly the calm she needs in exam time.

But if you're talking about this term for your trip, I can see that would be different. I wouldnt do it persoanlly as I think family trips are for the whole family, but its a personal thing if your DD would be OK with it.

Isn't this Spring Half Term, nose-down mega-revision time, just completed some modules?

It's October half term.

All irrelevant now anyway thanks for the posts - dh has said 'it's either all or nothing', won't go without dd.

Says there will be other options other years to go - damn I was so excited.

Not even a discussion? What does your DD think? Does your DH always get to be the boss of everything?

Who died and made him boss?