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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to give this feedback about toddler gym class?

63 replies

NeedaCostume · 20/09/2011 13:52

Do you think it is worth giving comments (even toned down)? Or should I just ignore and not go back?

Dear [Venue Manager],

I visited [venue] last week to take my two sons aged 3 and 14 months to [Baby Gym Class]. I hope you don?t mind but I thought I?d email you with some feedback. I?ve exchanged emails with you a couple of times, and you seem like a friendly, open person, and I hope it might be helpful to you.

Firstly, I thought the session was quite expensive. I paid £7.50 for the two children for an hour, yet last week for just 50p more, I took them to [Local Big Softplay], where the equipment is much bigger and better and we could stay as long as we wanted (in fact 3-4 hours, including lunch).

Secondly, we didn?t really get an hour?s play, because we had an enforced break for 10 mins in the middle and finished 10 mins early to do a song and dance type routine. This was a shame as my children enjoyed the equipment and would have preferred to keep playing.

During the break, we were offered free tea / coffee / squash / cheap biscuits. The thing is though, I don?t really want my children to have an unhealthy snack mid morning, but because we were all sitting in a circle with other children eating them it was hard to say no without causing a tantrum. Nor did I really feel like a weak Maxwell House in a polystyrene mug which made my teeth itch. Maybe if you just offered to parents to help themselves / their children if they wanted a drink rather than enforcing everyone to sit down together it would be better?

Your staff member was trying his hardest to be helpful, but actually little help was really needed in this session, and he?d have been better to just supervise and let parents get on with it. Also, why was he wearing a microphone headpiece? He looked like he should either be working in a call centre or auditioning to be in ?Steps?. Altogether his fake cheerfulness was irritating.

I chose your Gym session rather than a music class because I?ve always found it difficult to muster the energy to disco dance with complete strangers at 10.25 on a Tuesday morning. So I was cringing internally as the disco lights and ?hokey cokey? music started up. My back ached as I carried the baby and tried to encourage a reluctant 3 year old to dance.

I think your [Venue] is a great addition to [local town] and we really need a place to go, and hope you?ll take this feedback without it causing offence.

Kind regards
NeedaCostume

OP posts:
Original poster
NeedaCostume · 20/09/2011 14:17

Lynniep... I think that is why I posted here rather than send it... I just needed to get it out of my system. Didn't expect to get such a thorough pasting...

OP posts:
hobnobsaremyfavourite · 20/09/2011 14:19

That is not a pasting. And if you were prepared to dish out poorly disguised sarcasm dressed as "feedback" don't be surprised with the "feedback" you've recieved on here.

chicletteeth · 20/09/2011 14:19

If the woman who organised this is so nice, why would you want to send a letter like this to her?

Were you expected Illy espress and duchy originals shortbread dear?

TandB · 20/09/2011 14:21

Nothing wrong with trying for a light tone when writing this sort of letter - I once got very good service from the local authority in relation to a wrongly-issued parking ticket after sending a semi-jokey letter setting out daft ways in which I could have avoided getting the ticket and asking which one they recommended.

Unfortunately it looks like you aimed for that sort of light-hearted approach, thinking that it would encourage the manager to laugh along with you and maybe be more open to suggestions, but missed and came in at snidey and patronising instead.

If you really want to give feedback then why not re-write it and tone it down a bit?

Original poster
NeedaCostume · 20/09/2011 14:23

I wasn't expecting a drink at all. Just to play on the play equipment. And I suppose I didn't think this through before posting. I wanted to know (a) whether it is worth giving feedback at all and (b) to have a rant.

I have learnt (a) NO and (b) if you rant you'll get a negative reaction.

OP posts:
Tchootnika · 20/09/2011 14:24

If all these MNers think the tone of the letter is rude, maybe you should modify it. (I don't see that it is, though.)

As for it being too much based on 'personal taste' - this is the sort of thing that's actually useful for these sorts of businesses to find out about, since it's quite easy for them to alter some of the things you've mentioned, and to an extent, running groups like this successfully is about catering for personal taste.

I think there's enough positive comment in your letter, and the tone is conversational enough to show that it's not meant as a serious gripe - just as comment that they can take or leave.

Original poster
NeedaCostume · 20/09/2011 14:25

Thanks Kungfu - you always come up with good advice. But I think I'll leave it now and just vote with my feet by not going back.

OP posts:
chicletteeth · 20/09/2011 14:25

Well, you can give feedback and you can rant, but surely you can see that you letter is a little OTT, precious-sounding and, err, rude?

Seriously, the guy's headset - why does this bother you enough to write about it?

meravigliosa · 20/09/2011 14:27

OP nothing wrong with a good honest rant. And nothing wrong with well-thought-through polite, or even (as kungfu says) humorous feedback if you get the tone right. But I think if this is really meant to be sent as feedback, the tone is wrong, and you didn't post it as a rant.

ScarlettIsWalking · 20/09/2011 14:27

Good lord PMSL

eurochick · 20/09/2011 14:32

This gym isn't near Morissons in Aylesbury is it?

afussyphase · 20/09/2011 14:34

If I were running a new local toddler group I'd like to have responses from parents. They could easily extend the time, offer another activity together other than snacks, etc. If everyone just doesn't go again, and it falls apart and isn't profitable, then the community loses something. I think if you like them and think you could like the setting, it's worth sending some feedback, but obviously after the reaction on here you may want to keep it brief, and change the wording and emphasis somewhat.

Laquitar · 20/09/2011 14:36

I think you should keep your clever ideas to yourself and start up a business.

Honestly, everything is easier when you are outside and not in the business yourself.

And i agree that the letter doesn't sound funny but snobby.

bumbleymummy · 20/09/2011 14:37

I actually do think it's worth giving feedback, just not in the way you are giving it. There is nothing wrong with suggesting that the break be more optional rather than organised and that healthy alternatives to squash/biscuits could be provided. If you want to complain about price then do so although it actually doesn't sound bad to me for an organised activity. I don't think you should compare it to softplay because it's obviously a different thing and I don't think you need to be so openly critical. If it's not your type of thing then don't go back but if you think your suggestions would improve it for others then it is worth doing.

IrmaMuthafucker · 20/09/2011 14:41

Fair enough OP that you've decided not to send it. As pp have posted out all of your points are about personal preference. They are offering a service that you found wasn't to your taste. It will be to others and I think you're right to just not go back.

I am reminded though of the person who rang up Saga to berate them for only offering holidays to the over 50s Grin

OTheHugeRaveningWolef · 20/09/2011 14:43

I thought that letter was pretty funny. Not sure I'd actually send it though. Maybe just don't go back?

spiderpig8 · 20/09/2011 14:45

You go to a gym class, then criticise it for not being an unstructured soft play event??

ladyintheradiator · 20/09/2011 14:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NinkyNonker · 20/09/2011 15:15

Look, if you want to give feedback do it, but there is no need to be so scathing. You say you like her, then why be rude to her? The sarky comments r e coffee and her instructor, wither not helpful and just mean.

belgo · 20/09/2011 15:24

What's wrong with Maxwell House? At least it wasn't Nescafe.

cestlavielife · 20/09/2011 15:25

"I wish there were a place to take toddlers that is actually fun for adults too"

very funny.

how would that place look?

lesley33 · 20/09/2011 15:27

As someone who managed activities including those for children I would have welcomed your letter. Yes its is snidy in places, but it is still helpful.

MumblingRagDoll · 20/09/2011 15:34

I wont have another go at you...but I do agree with the others on here...I am like you and hate alll the dancing and crap coffees but I do it because the kids like it. If yours don't enjoy it at all then just dont bother. MOst kids DO love the music and the crap biccies though....youu sound like you'd rather a free playgroup.

ContraryMartha · 20/09/2011 15:36

Oh good grief.
The letter is FUNNY!

And the class sounds horrendous. Dancing with children. No, just no.

ll31 · 20/09/2011 16:18

think your letter will come across badly tbh - - I'd just mention the main thing you're unhappy with - I mean the stuff about the crap coffee and ur children only eating healthy stuff - well if you dont want ur kids to eat it dont let them etc.. Alsothe play place being cheaper is a bit silly as ur comparing 2 different things - a baby gym class and a few hrs free play. You'd expect class to be dearer given that a class usually comes with a teacher..

I'd relax and just take your kids where you want but realise ur not going to like or enjoy some places - tho ur kids hopefully will