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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to buy my kids a childrens' Bible when I'm an atheist

72 replies

clairefromsteps · 19/09/2011 22:27

My husband and I are both atheists. Not mad, ranting ones; we just don't happen to believe in god. Our village school is excellent and also happens to be a C of E school. Our twins (4) have just started there and while we are atheists we are happy for our children to be taught about god, Jesus etc as we think they should make their own mind up about religion when the time comes.

So, today they came home from school and DS said 'Do you know Mummy? Today we had assembly and Mrs Headteacher said that if you have a baby boy you all have to be killed! Phew, isn't it lucky that 2-month-old-DD2 came out as a girl! Or we'd all be KILLED! They'd KILL us! But it's OK because we could float down a river and escape.' I asked him if they'd had a story about a chap called Moses in assembly and he said that yes, they had.

Bearing in mind my son clearly does not intend to pay attention in assembly, I think it would be a good idea to get a kids' Bible to clear up any misunderstandings with. You know, a nice illustrated one with all the stories in. Not too hellfire-and-brimstoney. DH, however, thinks it would be hypocritical and got all huffy when I suggested it. I think he's being foolish and that we chose to send our kids to a CofE school and should be prepared to answer/clear up questions that our kids may have.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Meteorite · 19/09/2011 22:32

YANBU. The Bible is history, literature, culture, sociology, geography and good old-fashioned story-telling, as well as being what Christians consider to be (literally or not) the word of God.

A1980 · 19/09/2011 22:32

YANBU at all. Some lovely stories in the bible.

FootballFriendSays · 19/09/2011 22:33

Get a few from the library. I don't think it's hypocritical at all, you wouldn't think like that about Greek myths, Cinderella and so on.

Sirzy · 19/09/2011 22:34

Sounds very sensible to me!

scaevola · 19/09/2011 22:35

YANBU: Old Testament stories are parts of three religions, New Testament the foundation of Christianity which has been dominant in Europe, plus Jesus acknowledged as a (non-divine) prophet in Islam. There are a lot of important cultural references in there.

You can read a story without believing it, and having a text handy might be, as you have realised, useful in clearing up misunderstandings. You might consider also describing the stories as important legends (a legend being a story so old no-one knows if it's true or not - a bit like King Arthur, or the Greek myths).

Your approach sounds enlightened to me - acknowledging religion as a phenomena, and making sure the home influence gets equal airtime with the school version, and with the same stating point. Another rather nice book you might like to look out for is "Buddha at Bedtime". Then you can also introduce the concept of an atheist (or should that be non-theist) faith, and your Dc will have had an excellent grounding from which to make up their own mind idc.

Minus273 · 19/09/2011 22:36

Sounds like a good idea to me. They are great stories for children and bible stories form a basis for many more modern forms of literature. It is good they will be able to grow up understanding the references.

scaevola · 19/09/2011 22:37

Buddha at Bedtime on Amazon.

Fennel · 19/09/2011 22:37

We are atheists and the dc have been given several children's bibles. I don't mind, it's a culturally important book in our society, useful for them to know about it.
I quite like the stories with the hellfire and brimstone in though. It's not particularly in my atheistic interest to just go for the nice fluffy bits of religion. The nastier bits are relevant to why I'm an atheist.
We have books on other religions, Greek myths etc too.

weblette · 19/09/2011 22:37

YANBU, it's part of their cultural history whatever your own viewpoint on their veracity might be. Have done the same for mine.

Proudnscary · 19/09/2011 22:37

Not at all - my dc LOVE their children's bible. We read it all the time. And I am the biggest, fattest atheist around.
It's amazing how many of our cultural references/quotes come from the bible.

PercyFilth · 19/09/2011 22:40

Get a King James Bible as well while you're at it. Beautiful poetic language, so much more awesome than those trite dumbed-down versions they use nowadays. I was brought up with this and it instilled a feeling for poetry in me, even though I didn't always understand it.

aldiwhore · 19/09/2011 22:41

YANBU... I'm agnostic by the way, as in, no faith but I edge my bets and hope, but I also love my DH who's an atheist and far more logical, perceptive and kind without diety than me.

ANYWAY.... would you buy your child a good book? Aesop's Fables? Tinga Tinga tales? Greek myths? Any good story? Even better if it has a 'moral' message... (that you agree with)

YANBU!! A great story is a great story, if they want to persue the origin of that story in greater detail, fine... I think though that a great story wins above anything its attached to, you can buy into the story without buying into what's behind it or agreeing with who wrote its personal life.

The bible is, in my opinion, a pretty damn good read. I don't agree with all of it, but then I got quite infuriated with many characters in many books. I'd say the parabells are 'nice' and have a universal message of sorts, and the old testament (to an atheist/agnostic) is no different to the greek myths in that you don't have to sign up to the Church to enjoy them.

LauraIngallsWilder · 19/09/2011 22:42

I think you are being entirely reasonable - bible stories are fab :)

As a childrens story bible we rather like this one here (might still be available in The Works for £5)

A 'proper' bible for children this one

LRDTheFeministDragon · 19/09/2011 22:44

You used to be able to get ones that were (very!) abridged King James - I honestly don't see why any child would assume they're meant to be true stories unless you were religious and told them so. Surely exposure to the stories as stories is the best way to show that they really are not much different from fairytales in your view?

ViviPru · 19/09/2011 22:47

YANBU - I have very vivid memories of being read the Old Testament in infant school when I was 5, from a nice illustrated one with all the stories in. I absolutely loved it.

I am and always have been agnostic, but having experienced the bible in that way has stayed with me, informed my understanding, and helped me hold my own in discussions about faith.

CurrySpice · 19/09/2011 22:50

I would personally rather explain things myself to the kids rather than buy a bible

FabbyChic · 19/09/2011 22:51

The bible is not history, saying it is history is saying it happened that it is real.

It isn't.

4 year olds are impressionable, and I'd not try to impress them with fantasies at that age.

Bue · 19/09/2011 22:53

Very sensible. I sometimes worry that kids who have no knowledge whatsoever of Bible stories are at a bit of a disadvantage, since it still forms a major part of our culture and literature.

Meteorite · 19/09/2011 22:53

It is history written in the best ways that were known at the time. History can include metaphorical writings.

"The bible is not history, saying it is history is saying it happened that it is real."

GalaxyWeaver · 19/09/2011 22:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Meteorite · 19/09/2011 22:55

History can include metaphorical writings... to aid understanding of the points that the author was trying to make. For example the parables of Jesus are obviously metaphors, but they're history in terms of them being recorded by eyewitnesses. And many Christians believe the creation story was a metaphor. But it is still a historical account of the beliefs they had at the time.

LRDTheFeministDragon · 19/09/2011 22:55

'The bible is not history, saying it is history is saying it happened that it is real.'

Confused

History is the study of the past. The Bible is a historical document. How is saying it's history the same as saying it's real?

echt · 19/09/2011 22:58

YANBU. The Bible is fundamental to understanding so much of western literature and culture. And yes, students are at a disadvantage not having a basic knowledge of it at their fingertips.

The Book of Common Prayer is good (for much later).

I second what was said about the King James Bible and its beautiful language.

Oh, and I am staunch atheist.

Minus273 · 19/09/2011 23:01

The bible is important to the understanding of history. The bible has been used as the justification to of many a decision and played an important part in many historical events. Having a basic understanding of the contents of the bible help you understand what may have been the motivation behind some actions at these times. You do not have to regard the content as factual to learn from it.

aldiwhore · 19/09/2011 23:01

But the stories??? Sure when my eldest domes home and asks how the earth was made the (bloody) bible has thrust me into deep conversation that I don't wish for when cooking spag bol, but it DOES instigate conversation. Curryspice can you explain the world?

Anyone who thinks they can is talking bollocks. Anyone, whatever their belief who says, this is what I think, this is what's been said, these are the ideas from other people... well they're on the right track to bringing up a child who will explore possibilities and find their own way.

I used to play "Daniel and the Lion Pit" with my Cindy and my hamster... I still love Sinbad... I adore Aesop, and I have to acknowledge that thebible, and kid's versions of, have greater stories.

As for 'how the world began'.. on my bookshelves there's a few kids 'how the world was made' atheist books, a bible and a treasured book of mine called The Second Earth, which is pure fantasy with a very real message... as an 8 year old, they're ALL stories and wonderful.