WIBU to ask the neighbours to adjust their garden lighting at night?

[SenoritaViva]

Sorry rather dull!

Live perpendicular to neighbours; they have rather bright lights that light up their garden. Fair enough, but they are on a sensor switch and go on and off throughout the night which significantly changes the level of light in our bedroom. It's the changing in light that's bothering me, I don't really mind if they want the lights on or off but to keep it that way. The old neighbours never had the lights on (we live in a rural village and there really isn't much crime).

Once I am asleep then they don't bother me, but when getting to sleep they can be really irritating and as I'm pregnant and popping off to the loo at least once a night, along with DD occasionally waking me up, it's often the getting back to sleep in the middle of the night that is disturbed as well.

WIBU to knock on their door and make a request for them to change their light settings, or should I respect people's wishes and lump it?

YANBU at all if you explain exactly as you have here. I would rather my neighbours asked me if they needed to.

You wouldn't be unreasonable to ask, but they might say no.

We had one like that at my parents house - used to go off when animals walked across the garden. However our house backed onto a field so it wasn't a problem - only used to bother me at the back of the house!

No you shouldn't just lump it! Ask them. I hate lights shining into my room at night.

We used to have a house behind us with sensors - but they were so bloody sensitive they came on every time a cat walked past or a bird landed on the wall or the wind blew! Shone straight into DD's bedroom and woke her up. Was working myself up to say something when it stopped - either someone else asked or took direct action and smashed the stupid things!

Ask them.

I would hate the thought that my security lights are on all through the night. It might just be that the sensors can be angled differently

Thanks everyone, not sure why I feel nervous! How can one be assertive at work and become a total wet at home?!

YANBU at all. I have a neighbour who has one of those fucking antisocial security lights. I have decent curtains so it doesn't bother me too much but if it was flicking on and off it would drive me bonkers.

Being assertive is about saying the right thing, politely and reasonably, without giving away the fact that on the inside you'd rather just be a total wet and not be asking in the first place. Just ask, and if they say no, best buy some blackout linings for the curtains. Chances are they're lovely and don't realise the problems the lights are causing you.