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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To hate reading books about child abuse?

68 replies

DarlingDuck · 12/09/2011 20:02

I mean the autobiographical books. I imagine it's a good form of therapy for the writer and could be helpful to others who read it and have been through similar situations but I find them gut wrenching and haunting and cannot imagine why someone would want to read a book detailing abuse, is this an unreasonable reaction?

OP posts:
DarlingDuck · 12/09/2011 20:23

It may be a silly question but you never know, the misery porn fans could have been online in full force this evening and flamed me for suggesting their favourite genre could be in anyway unpallitable

OP posts:
grumplestilskin · 12/09/2011 20:24

I do like things like Alone on the Wide Wide Sea by Michael Morphigo and Man's Search For Meaning where there are very sad aspects but its not gratuitious or even really the main focus of the book

takethisonehereforastart · 12/09/2011 20:26

YANBU to not understand why anyone would want to read them, although I can understand why some people feel the need to write them.

I have a book on my shelves called When A Baby Dies. I bought it following my son's stillbirth and my premature daughters death. It is mostly filled with stories from other parents who have lost children, in their own words, and at various stages of life following their loss. It has helped me, and I am glad that these people were brave enough to tell their stories. I think it should be compulsive reading for anyone training to become a midwife etc too.

It's not the sort of book you would find on sale in the supermarket, complete with a picture of a scared looking blonde child and a title like "please daddy, don't" etc. It's far removed from that sort of book. But it has true stories from real families in it and I would wonder why someone wanted to read it if they or someone close to them hadn't lost a child or if they were not working in an environment that brought them into contact with parents who had lost a child.

I was shopping with my SIL at the weekend and she picked up a copy of A Boy Called It and asked if I had read it. She was quite insistent that I "had" to read it and said "it's a terrible story, but it's really compelling, everyone should read it."

Um. No thanks.

I think that IF these books can make a difference in some way, if they can inspire people to donate to charities like the NSPPC or lobby to have the law changed for abusers then that is a good thing. But I'm sceptical that those are the reasons that most people read them or that those are the reasons they get published in the first place.

And sometimes I wonder if the person writing the book hasn't become a victim of something else entirely.

PontyMython · 12/09/2011 20:29

I hate misery porn. DH and I are both abuse survivors and find it pretty insulting seeing people engrossed in them.

I work in a library and what really pisses me off is that some of them actually appear in the non-fiction section, they are included in Dewey under social care... Ugh.

As if reading those books is going to make somebody a brilliant social worker! Angry

DarlingDuck · 12/09/2011 20:31

My tolerance for reading books/articles or watching programmes/films with cruelty to children involved has become non existent since becoming a mother, I find it quite unbearable.

OP posts:
LeBOF · 12/09/2011 20:37

This is the only one worth reading...Wink

BatsUpMeNightie · 12/09/2011 20:38

Read them? Shit - I can't even look at them in the bookshop. I've never met anyone who does read them either but I suppose these people must exist.

MissPenteuth · 12/09/2011 20:38

BOF "having a baboon?s arse grafted onto his face" Grin

pissedrightoff · 12/09/2011 20:39

I read a child called it and physically vomited at one point. I will not read any of this genre of books. However a good friend of mine who had a fairly tragic childhood reads these books as almost a form of therapy, She says it's helpful to know that she isn't the only one and that others have come through similar situations and still managed to make a life for themselves.

grumplestilskin · 12/09/2011 20:39

Grin leBOF

LeBOF · 12/09/2011 20:42

I love the so-accurate bits in the blurb, like "'Sensational ... the gloom-ride of the summer ... makes the Book of Job look like the Life of Riley? Misery Lit Review" Grin

AnyFucker · 12/09/2011 20:47

My mother reads them

< says no more >

LeBOF · 12/09/2011 20:47

There's a cracking extract on Amazon.

SardineQueen · 12/09/2011 20:55

I flinch at the titles and covers in smiths.

I wish they would go away.

SayCoolNowSayWhip · 12/09/2011 21:09

Bof for bringing that book into my life I am forever grateful.

Just that extract has had me crying with laughter. DH does not see the funny side and forbade me to read any more aloud.

Ahem.

In answer to OP, YANBU Grin

zukiecat · 12/09/2011 21:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GypsyMoth · 12/09/2011 21:16

I saw the film 'the kid' today, based on a book I think. Dd wanted to watch it, so we did . Not stopped thinking about it all afternoon.

LynetteScavo · 12/09/2011 21:23

YANBU.

I totally understand why someone might write such a book, but to read about someone else suffering for your own entertainment? No thanks!

LynetteScavo · 12/09/2011 21:24

Having said that, I should point out I've never actually read any. The title and front cover is usually enough to make me feel uncomfortable.

MorelliOrRanger · 12/09/2011 21:25

I hate them :(

SardineQueen · 12/09/2011 21:25

No I've never actually read one either! Like you, the covers and titles are enough.

Mind you BoFs link is amusing Grin

IWillOnlyEatBeans · 12/09/2011 21:34

I got part way through a Child Called It but didn't finish it. These kind of books definitely hold no appeal to me. I do wonder what readers get from them - do they like them because they have some kind of 'there but for the grace of god...' appeal? Or (disturbingly) so some people find them a bit...titillating? Either way - yuck.

CalamityKate · 13/09/2011 01:22

A Child Called It never rang true to me.

PreviouslyonLost · 13/09/2011 01:41

I'm another one who averts their eyes at the WH Smith stand full of this type of book. Did have a jaw-drop moment the first time I came across it and saw how many of the genre there actually were.

herecomesthsun Andrea Ashworth's 'Once in a house on fire' is a great book and beautifully written.

Whatmeworry · 13/09/2011 07:12

Grimlit....... Avoid.