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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am i expecting too much

20 replies

ike1 · 10/09/2011 17:59

Been seeing bf for a year (i am single mum of 2). Been really ill with flu for nearly 2 weeks no family only a bit of support from friends. Bf came round with flowers for the only time last sun. Great! I thought. But then he fell asleep on sofa for 20 mins, whined that he was bored then wanted to go within an hour. He had previously suggested that he stayed for the evening so I was a bit upset (burst into tears actually, a result of fending for myself and the kids alone for a week +). Cue accusations of crocodile tears and marching off. Have sent some very bitter texts and dumped him. (Laughably he thinks he wants to be a dad! Wants me as the mother to his sprogs). Am I expecting too much for a little loving attention when ill?

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 10/09/2011 18:01

No, you're not expecting too much, but thank god you know what he's like before having a child with him.

Truthfully, though, did you expect him to be different? He sounds very immature.

Takitezee · 10/09/2011 18:02

YANBU. At least you found this side of him before having any children with him.

AgentZigzag · 10/09/2011 18:03

I agree with Imperial that it's better you find out he's like this now than after having children with him.

Hope you're feeling better soon.

backwardpossom · 10/09/2011 18:04

He sounds really mature... "I'm bored". WTF?

ike1 · 10/09/2011 18:05

Oh I was never gonna have kids with him. It just makes me laugh that he thinks he so seriously thinks he has the temperament. Hes 42 btw. I just find being ill sooooo depressing as a lone parent and this flu had been a bugger to shift. A very lonely time.

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CogitoErgoSometimes · 10/09/2011 18:05

YANBU... So when are you going to dump the selfish git?

ike1 · 10/09/2011 18:05

He's dumped dont worry

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Tchootnika · 10/09/2011 18:06

YANBU, and it makes me sad that you can even suggest that you might be U.
How rude and selfish of him. Perhaps he's making you ill...
Get well soon!
Brew

AgentZigzag · 10/09/2011 18:06

'He sounds really mature... "I'm bored". WTF?'

The OP should have told him that only boring people get bored, and then set him to on cleaning the bathroom and hoovering Grin

It does sound young teenagerish behaviour.

What's he like normally?

CogitoErgoSometimes · 10/09/2011 18:07

Sorry... missed that part. Well done. :)

ike1 · 10/09/2011 18:13

Oh Im ashamed to say that I only kept him on cos i get bored and hes quite a good shag. Only trouble is, you then make the mistake of thinking you might be able to rely on the buggers! If only I hadnt have suddenly lost my sense of humour I could have suggested the cleaning. He is a bit of a clean freak btw

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CogitoErgoSometimes · 10/09/2011 18:16

A selfish clean freak that find sick people a PITA, eh?.... He wouldn't be vain as well, would he? (I may know this person)

ike1 · 10/09/2011 18:18

Oh god yes...not a phil by chance?

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Nagoo · 10/09/2011 18:21

I thought you were going to say he was 19.

YANBU.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 10/09/2011 18:22

Not a Phil... but I think there's a factory somewhere churning them out to order. :)

ike1 · 10/09/2011 18:26

Lol I know but they'd have to be discount priced! Lol.. Really most of the time I am fine and it has been nice to have someone to go for meals/cinema etc. But anything more than that sees him back track big time. Sigh. Just would love a lovely fella to make me a cuppa and snuggle up with to watch a film. Sob

OP posts:
oldraver · 10/09/2011 18:27

He's shown his true colours and you have had a lucky escape. Dont look back

ike1 · 10/09/2011 18:28

Though I understand from some of the mums at the school gate that this would only happen if cricket/footie/lads/drinking etc etc was not occuring.

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TrillianAstra · 10/09/2011 18:52

You haven't actually asked an "Am I Being Unreasonable" question, you know.

But YANBU to expect better than that from a boyfriend.

ike1 · 10/09/2011 19:13

Soz never done the AIBU thang before. Put it down to the flu + shite bf. Couldnt help but text him to let him know that MNetters thought he was whinging and immature. Childish I know but so whaaaaaaat!

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