to worry about seeing older and older children in buggies?

[mariebl]

In the last couple of years I've really started to notice many more children in buggies, some of them must be almost school age.
I also very often see them looking unhappy and bored and trying to get out and being told off for being "naughty".

I'm beginning to think it must be my age as not too many years back there didn't really seem to BE any buggies for older children, babies went in prams, when they started toddling they had reins and when they got tired people picked them up and carried them for a bit.

I appreciate that there are children with conditions where having that transport is helpful and necessary but I also believe that having older and older children in buggies is a recent trend which is in danger of becoming the norm. We are also told we have a child obesity crisis and are told that children do not get enough exercise.
Am I being judgemental to say is this kind of trend a part of it?

Just a comment on the practicality of a alrge buggy over a wheelchair:

The Major that we have comes with a sunshade, rain hood and shopping basket, so is suitable for use in all weathers. It is light and easy to manoeuvre up and down the billion kerbs we have to negotiate on the school walk and it's fixed so it reclines a little, so when DS2 is tired (like others upthread, he is hypermobile as well as having ASD and does tire easily, though recently, he has improved a lot in this respect) he can sit back (though if he falls asleep, he slumps in it). It's also slim enough to push through some narrow aisles in shops - it's just grabby hands and kicky feet that hinder our progress in all but the most cluttered shops.

A basic wheelchair would be clunky and exhaust me and be a pain to store when not in use. There's also not many places on one to stash shopping and bags.

Lunabelly
Ah yes, I agree. But anyone making comments or doing faces is a knob. You never know what the individual situation is.
I also agree that roads feel more worrying. And also that we seem more pressed for time.

Still, pushing a pissed off child who looks about five or six years old around the shops for hours on end does seem to be more popular than can really equate with the number of large babies and those of us with dc with sn.
I possibly observe high number because I live in the centre of town and it hobestly is noticeable.

But people will feel defensive about their own choices if they feel they are being swept into a generalisation. Totally understandable.

pandapop, yes that's happened to me a few times too! It's just not worth the hassle. There comes a point where you can rely on them to walk it and not have to abandon shopping/supermarket basket mid-aisle/other child (!) because they either need a carry or have taken off.

why punish ourselves? I mean yes quite when they become reliable but buggy use isn't making children fat. I've never seen an older, fat child in a buggy anyway...have you OP? Parents might well not FEEL like pushing around a fat child...it would be a disincentive in itself.

quit, not quite, sorry

Maypole 1 - if that comment on page 3 was directed at me then I can assure you that she will not be in the buggy at age 10. Also on the rare occasion I take the buggy on the bus she sits on the seat or my lap and I fold it up. Believe me she gets enough exercise and is far from obese. So give it a rest please.

And OP where are you?

I am often slightly taken aback when I see DD's friends still being pushed in buggies; DD hasn't used one for a year (she is 3 and a half).

I do think though, that it is easy to just be in the habit of using the buggy, and for your child to get older and older, and you haven't really reassessed whether you actually need to use it - it is just what you do. Of course there is never really a defined cut off point when a child goes from needing a buggy all the time to walking all the time, it is going to be gradual.
And furthermore, sometimes the transition is going to be difficult, it often demands more effort to walk with a toddler; you have to allow more time etc etc.

For us the change was easy for two reasons; we moved to a place with good public transport, and I found it easier to hop on and off buses and trains with DD without being encumbered with the buggy. And DD started to refuse to go in it anyway.
Perhaps if that hadn't happened, I'd still be pushing her round, and she wouldn't be able to spend the day walking round, which she now CAN do.

It's easy to be defensive and feel attacked when someone says your child is too old to still be doing something; after all it ISN'T any of their business! But that doesn't mean that we as parents shouldn't try and guard against getting into the habit of treating our children as babies when they are ready to move on. I'm all for doing things when your child is ready; that implies a responsibility for parents to recognise when their child IS ready (to give up drinking from bottles, start potty training, ditch the buggy or whatever), and not just to stick to the status quo in the interests of an easier life.

DD2 is 2.5 and over this summer we've rarely used the buggy. Was bloody fantastic in fact taking her to London last Friday, so much easier! She was on her feet much of the afternoon and did really well.

But sometimes when I was using the buggy, DD1 would fancy a ride esp on the way home from school, and DD2 was happy to walk (in fact she found it hilarious that big sis was in the buggy).

I wonder how many people though "Ugh, look at that lazy six year old in the buggy." You see, this is why judging should mostly be avoided. Quite often what you are seeing is just a snapshot of someone's life.

in the interests of an easier life.

But what's wrong with an easier life? I don't think we should aim for a harder one!

I think what you mean people often don't go for short term pain over long term gain. Which actually makes for an easier life in itself.

I didn't take it as a personal attack at all!

My point was, as others have pointed out, that DD2 'looks' normal so therefore could be misconstrued as one who is simply too old/big to be in a buggy. I do see the point in general, but it must have come from observations and I am one of those people who gets dodgy, judgmental looks from passers-by.

When dd2 was 3 and dd1 didn't need to be at school, and ds hadn't arrived with his erratic non-routine, dd2 used to be quite happy to walk all over the place. The problems came when we a) moved house - she became completely freaked out with change in routine, b) dd1 started school - we had to be somewhere at a specific time - no more ambling along and c) ds arrived - dd2 out of sorts from new arrival, plus everything became more difficult because ds is pretty high maintenance.

I wish people would stop saying, 'well, my dd/ds walked xxx miles at 2 years old....make them walk...if a child isn't ill or disabled then they don't need to be in a pshchair etc etc'

Everyone is different, everyone has a different ton of crap to deal with day to day, rather than peering into the pushchair and saying, 'ooh, you're a big girl to be getting pushed around like that.' maybe just mind your own business and walk on by, hey.

in the interests of an easier life.

But what's wrong with an easier life? I don't think we should aim for a harder one!

I think what you mean people often don't go for short term pain over long term gain. Which actually makes for an easier life in itself.

Insomnia, thank you, yes, that is exactly what I mean!

Clanger I was offered a McLaren Major for ds(asd) when he was 4. The benefits over a wheelchair were ,
handle was higher so easier to push.

It had a harness over just a lap belt so less chance of escaping
Very easy to fold and store

Out of interest when do people think children should be made to walk and not given a buggy?

Tabitha/ Insomnia, great posts. I think this thread has gone off the OT, I will put my hand up and say I see far more children of an older age being pushed around now and before I get flamed I mean children over the age of 4 (with no SN). Of course I am fully aware that special circumstances exist but it does seem to be more than the norm now i.e. larger buggies available to buy etc.

Debs, I would go with 4 (at the latest with no SN), pre school and primary school kids normally would be aware of wanting to "not look younger "

Maypole1 why are you so mad at people using buggies for their children? It has nothing to do with you how they raise their children and using a buggy past the age of 2 will not result in an obese child/adult.
DD1 was quite lazy and liked her pram/buggy so used it till past 3. It suited me as I regularly walked 3 miles a day as we had no car and she would not have managed that. She is now 15 and not obese and quite willing to go for long walks.
These people you see driving to tescos and putting child in buggy, you don't know why they do that or what thype of day the dc has had.

Kaumana that sounds pretty fair although it does depend on the circumstances.. I don't agree with buggies been larger now, almost all of them have a 15kg weight limit on them, dd2 is 3 next week and is on the 50% for weight so she is already too big for a buggy

Deb75

I don't think there is a magic age and I think it will vary upon the child and the walk to be undertaken.
Dd used to walk the 20 mins it took to get to her nursery when she was two. But I was alone and in no hurry and she was small enough to lift and carry a bit.

But I am interested that you phrase it as "made to walk and not given a buggy"
My dc rarely had to be made to walk. Perhaps they are unusual in that respect. Dd fucking hated being put in the buggy unless she was really tired.

We like walking. She hates it if we drive to school. I would not phrase it as "made to walk"

But she is odd. It's true

But I am interested that you phrase it as "made to walk and not given a buggy"
I meant when you would go out for a walk and leave the buggy at home so they had no choice. All mine have happily walked but dd1 preferred the option of a buggy. dd2 hates her buggy

Yep, they are all different.

With dd that was two then. I only took the buggy if I knew we would be out a really long time.
So my starting point was always 'can we walk are do we really have to take the buggy'

This probably all explains my complete befuddlement at the whole travel system matching raincoat, toe cover, handbag, bottle warmer, Eco system trend.

What's wrong with using a buggy until you need to? And why is it anybody elses' business. Personally, i used a buggy until my dc was 4. Why? Because i don't have a car. Some days, we'd have to walk 5 miles. Sometimes in bad weather. I'd also have to carry two bags of shopping. I couldn't manage to carry that and put my dc on my shoulders too, if they were too tired to walk any further. It's a sensible way of looking after your back.

It's always the people who drive everywhere who make these judgements on others imv. I personally haven't seen any extremely obese dcs sitting in buggies, not allowed to walk.

There are times e.g. when you're trying to make a drs appointment or catch a bus, that you need to strap your dc in and belt down the road. If you were to walk at small child pace, you'd miss the apppointment or the bus.

It saddens me that people are so judgmental of others in this respect.

I don't think people are truly sitting in judgement just an awareness of that "times have changed". It is more the norm now to use buggies for longer which did not happen for example when I was a child when car use/ownership was a lot less (am 40) and you would definitely not been been allowed to take pram on a bus.

Why do people care, not your child so not your business!!!

My ds just turned 4 and ill still take the p&t out for dd who's 2 incase he needs a rest. I have a buggy board on my mclaren which ds loves and isn't 'babyish' but its a pita to push long distances and makes my back ache so for my ease of life ds often hops in the back of p&t I intend to continue like this for as long as ds wants, he was prem and a late walker and gets tired quick and most of the time I need to be places on time.

So to the judgy pant 'buggys cause fat toddlers' snout out!

My DD1 has been out of a buggy since about 2.2.

I walked her and the dog to the pet shop recently to buy dog food and put her in the buggy (she would have been 2.11) to bring it home.

AFTER I had paid the guy behind the counter took the piss about her being in the buggy. I felt like saying "I have to heft 10 kilos of dog food home with me on foot. I only brought the buggy so I have somewhere to put it you dickwad"

But I smiled politely and laughed inwardly at his twattishness. I wonder if people do that to you OP?

JJ - you are right it is none of my business to judge you but it is in my right to wonder/question why children appear to be using buggies for longer at this time. Can we not have a balanced discussion with out it being personal?

I have a P&T sport (which is very rarely used now TBH) DD1 is almost 3.9 yo and DD2 is 2.1 yo.
We also have a single umbrella fold buggy for DD1 as she is tidgy and very slow and I really do not have the time to wait for her to walk. Also not a chance in hell I can carry her any length of time or distance due to my own physical problems (I struggle to carry a newborn unless I can sit down or rest)

This summer we took the DD's to Disney land Paris (with MIL) and even though there were 3 adults to two children we took the P&T so DD1 could rest as and when she needed/wanted. DD1 walks very long distances every week almost daily as we do not have a car so she has to. At the weekends she walks with us from our town to the next one, around it and back again and goes to a dance class and swimming (over the course of the weekend) so it is not like she is lazy or cant do it.

DD2 is 2.1yo and cannot walk any major distance, to the park and back is about all she can manage (park is 3 minutes from our house) Our nearest bus stop is the main top town bus station 1.5 miles from our house so until DD can walk further we will be using the buggy.

Just out of curiosity when should non SN children be walking all over in the OP's opinion?