To feel disheartened and that we will never be well off

[BimboNo5]

And have money to save for a rainy day like my parents/their parents did. That it will be a struggle to save for our kids to go to uni, never be able to afford to take the kids to disney world etc and after struggling each month just to make ends meet (both working full time, sometimes overtime) will have a measley pension to look forward to that will no doubt be taxed to the hilt.
Grr sorry to sound so god damn miserable but life seems like an uphill struggle to get NOWHERE at the moment

I agree with mum um car too.

When I was a child the mantra was basically "be grateful for what you've got".

The difficulty today is the "aspirational" content where we are constantly encouraged to 'better ourselves' by means of having things - more things and more expensive things. Those things don't actually make life better for anyone except the shareholders in whichever company it is that produces or sells them to us.

One of the happiest families I know don't have a bean.

I don't think it's wrong to want to take your kids to Disneyland, if it's something you know they would love! However, in our parents' time, very few people went abroad, so I don't think it was ever the norm. Luckily it is more acceptable now to go on holiday in the UK, even camping, so hopefully your kids will not feel hard done by in this respect.

University fees are another matter, of course. I don't know how far that is in the future for you, but things are changing so much, it is best to try not to worry about it. Most students will have to take massive loans, but they won't have to pay them back for a long time when they are earning enough. I myself took 10 years to earn enough to pay back my student loan, and have only just bought my own house (with DH) at the age of 35. I don't feel hard done by at all.

I work with a lot students from countries where the parents make huge sacrifices to educate their kids. They live in very small hours, only have one child, never travel, work long hours and genuinely think nothing of this because they value education so highly. I am not saying this is ideal, of course, but it does make me feel less poor in comparison.

Would it really matter if they never went to Disneyland? I think nowadays, and I'm guilty of this myself, people expect to be able to afford luxuries like expensive holidays, meals out and new stuff for the house in a way that people of previous generations didn't. We did have holidays when I was a child but never anything like Disneyland and I never felt I was missing out, and now that I look back on it, I realise that my parents budgeted carefully for treats but didn't go overboard. For example they didn't spend a huge amount on Christmas presents as so many people seem to now.

you dont know what will have happened govt/world/economy wise in 10 years time, tuition fees could be scrapped, disney could have gone bankrupt, pensions may be fully privatised

your kids may not want to go to uni, its not right for everyone

stop worrying and start living, who knows whats gonna happen

yanbu. but for yourr own sake try to think what you do have or relse you will go bonkers. look at what you have got and others haven't, ok so sometimes you are going to still miss the things the "joneses" have, that is natural but use it to spur you on if you can.

Agree you have to not look at what others have. Just do the best you can with what you've got.

I drive myself mad with this sometimes even though I know it's stupid; I was an academic overachiever and grew up always expecting to do better than everyone else . I have a good job in average terms (over £40k) but when compared with my Cambridge peers who are on £150k plus, it's peanuts. I have a big house, but it has a huge mortgage, and needs lots of money to be spent on it. And I have lots of friends locally who have similar homes and don't work.

My dad once said the best thing in life is to be content. His grandad was a farm labourer all his life, worked outside in all weathers for 60 years, walked 5 miles a day to work, had no money, lived in a tied cottage with outside loo and no electricity, yet lived a long and happy life. But of course that was back in the days when we expected a lot less!

Bimbo aren't you a nurse?

Who is too say you won't get a promotion? Can you put yourself forward for one?
Maybe one day you live aboard where you get paid more and living costs are lower?

I say never just give up and keep thinking how you get to where you want to be