Most crime is committed by men

[PerryCombover]

therefore I think we should ban them. Or AIBU?

I think we should force men to stay at home. As they have unfortunate tendencies towards violence they should also be disallowed any access to knives. So they'll have to be limited to eating knife-free foods such as curry, pizza, pasta and casseroles. It obviously would be unwise to allow them glassware, either, so they'll have to drink from safer, metal containers. Eg, cans of beer.

We couldn't possibly allow them to do the cooking or washing up because, quite frankly, the risk of the mayhem they could cause is beyond consideration. Knives and fire! Aaarrgh!

It is well known that lack of sleep has bad effects on mental health and emotional stability so we might just have to bite the bullet and let them spend much of the day snoozing. It's got to be the safest thing.

Finally, we will need to divert their violent and criminal tendencies into harmless activities. Maybe we could let them blow off such steam by playing computer games for hours - after all, it's got to be safer to limit them to virtually running around a virtual battlefield with a virtual gun rather than them doing it for real.

Sounds awful but, as a man, if that's what I'm going to have to do for the safety of society as a whole I suppose I will just have to bite the bullet. Pass the naan bread.

But if you get rid of men who is going to run all the businesses? Women?! But who's looking after their daughters?

With no men in the world there would be parking chaos, everything would be pink, be over-run with un-caught spiders, and grind to a half due to the workforce nattering and not wanting to get their nails dirty.

Wrong screwdrivers would be used for the wrong job. A hell on earth.

But everyone would ask for directions, listen carefully to the reply, and get to their destination quite efficiently and on time.

And then be unable to park when they get there.

Okay, now we are getting somewhere.

It is reasonable as long as we have a breeding programme in place and perhaps some sort of zoological centre to view Daniel Craig and his beautiful friends.

I feel we would only have to do this for 1 generation and then once we have sorted out some WW issues we could slowly start releasing stock back into the wild

I think the release programme would have to be carefully handled to avoid the poor dears coming out blinking into the light and wandering out into traffic, although that traffic would be going at sensible speeds and cautious of them, so it may no be so bad.

And the traffic would all be Barbie pink and covered in flowers so very easy to see.

I believe its mainly young men that commit crimes, maybe its best to pen them up in breeding centres secure institutions. Older ones can be banned or put in spider catcher vans.

Maybe we could let them blow off such steam by playing computer games for hours - after all, it's got to be safer to limit them to virtually running around a virtual battlefield with a virtual gun rather than them doing it for real

Far too violent...footie was invented for really being the opiate of the mens'es

I have a cracking 1982 Ford Cortina with its engine running outside - you lot run in, grab the till and the cash bags and I'll speed us off dahn Gatwick for the 7.30 flight to Rio.

Don't forget your tights mask - but for feck's sake don't bring the 100 denier ones this time; I don't want you holding up the Barnardo's shop by mistake again.
There was only bloody £2.56 in their till, fer gawd's sake. Couldn't even buy a pint.

All volunteers welcome at the MN Centre For Promotion of Women's Criminal Activity and Cake Shop; up the back stairs and knock three times.