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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not have taken my children out during the holidays due to money

13 replies

Shinyshoes1 · 01/09/2011 14:08

I have a 14 yo and an 11 yo. My DP has been off work sick with depression . He has just returned to work last week. I've been immobile for the best part of 3 weeks due to a cut on the join of my toes that required stitching .

We managed to take them to the pictures before all this, they've only been out once.

AIBU to have just given them the odd few pounds we've had and they've gone to the local club a few times.

I feel reallly guilty that we haven't done anything with them.

October half term should be better as we are both back to work now.

OP posts:

woowoo2 · 01/09/2011 14:08

YANBU. I have hardly done anything with ds or sdd's either.

We are all skint, but they have had a lovely holiday regardless

Original poster

Shinyshoes1 · 01/09/2011 14:09

Also we have a little bit of money now, we've sold a few things but we've gotten behind on a few things the money isn't there really.

Should I use this money that should really be used to pay bills or should I use it to take them out

OP posts:

MotherMucca · 01/09/2011 14:15

I would catch up with bills first. I've been there and it is no fun when they (and they will) catch up on you.

Have you any decent parks/free museums locally? I always take my son and a book and a picnic to the park when I'm skint. Can you do stuff with them at home? Such as have a board game night or film night or something.

I do empathise, it is shit when you have no money.

Petesmum · 01/09/2011 14:17

Use the money to pay the bills. The kids will ultimately prefer tv, electricity and less stressed parents to a trip to the cinema.
Am sure they've been round to friends during the holidays, enjoyed lie ins, enjoyed spending time with you both etc

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 01/09/2011 14:27

YABU.

Pay your bills otherwise your dc will have a dp who is stressing about money before, during, and after any outing.

Providing the essentials - a roof over your family's head, food, heating, lighting, clothing, transport, etc - should always be your first priority. Any money left over can be used for treats/outings - if there is no surplus, do without until there is some spare cash that can used with a clear conscience to provide inessentials.

Also, get creative. There are lots of fun things you can do as a family without leaving the comfort of your home and the October half-term will be here before you know it.

LineRunner · 01/09/2011 23:08

Please pay the bills!

You can have fun playing cards or just watching a DVD together. It's your company and attention they need most.

We made our own 'posh' burgers the other day. It was a laugh. It passed a whole evening, somehow. I know my kids want to go to Disneyland but it just ain't gonna happen...

samex2 · 01/09/2011 23:14

Better to keep a roof over all your heads and the wolf from the door. I've had to do the same thing again the children don't mind but I do feel guilty as they are cut off from their peer group and the onlyl time we have bumped into anyone we know we are all together so it looks as if they have to travel everywhere with mummy as they are never seen out with freinds/alone but it's because it's the one chance we get out - it;s happened twice this summer.

worraliberty · 02/09/2011 00:00

Don't beat yourself up about it

It's not like at their ages they can't play outside is it?

I don't really remember my parents doing a huge amount with us during the holidays (apart from 2wks at the seaside) but even then we amused ourselves.

A1980 · 02/09/2011 00:05

11 and 14 is old enough to amuse themselves. They aren't babies.

I did shit all when in the holidays when I was a child ever. We never went anywhere or did anything but go to town and look at the shops.

festi · 02/09/2011 00:07

YANBU 14 and 11 can and should be making thier own fun and plans, cinema once is enough.

as long as they havent been sitting in thier rooms playing computer for 6 weeks I would say you have had 10 years of school holidays you deserve a break now they are bigger. DD is 5 im skint and have loved having her at home but I cant wait to have her at school when normal frugal spending resumes.

fabanflabby · 02/09/2011 00:08

I think most people are a bit skint at the mo. We have had a couple of days out but even a family day can cost an absolute fortune!

When we were kids we spent the whole holiday out with friends and having fun, only returning home for food - oh the good old days. Didnt do me any harm and there was no talk of boredom in our house when I was a child. i was handed a book and told boredom was just a lack of imagination!

Somehow I dont think this would work on my kids!

Dont worry about not taking them out all over the place in the hols. When they grow up the memory will be spending time with people that care about them not the surroundings!

AuntiePickleBottom · 02/09/2011 00:12

i bet they enjoyed tv, chillaxing and hanging around the house.

my sister who has just turned 15, says it embarrising ?sp? to go out with parents

festi · 02/09/2011 00:14

ment to say pay the bills not take them out. thats what iv had to do, if dd wants to go out and iv had no money i have taken her to the park, etc.

I had a thought today when I walked a 10+ mile round trip to the beach with dd, fun it was though and we had a great day. when I was a child and said im bored my mum said tidy your room..today my dd said im bored I walked to the beach and then I tidied her room...

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