...to expect a whole day NOT to be written off for a bit of D+V?

[fegwood]

DP is off work at the moment - between projects so 'working from home' (with full permission of his boss) for a couple of weeks. I am not. DC with PIL at the moment for a few days.

I bob off to work quite happily this morning, then midmorning get a text saying he thinks he's dying. Briefly panic, phone him and establish that he has got diarrhoea and has been sick. Am sympathetic on the phone. Text him at lunchtime asking if he could pick up some burger baps and run the hoover round as we were having some people over for food and films. He says he's not up to it. OK, I grab the stuff on my way home.

Get home and he is lying on the sofa looking VERY sorry for himself, but the Xbox is on and hasn't gone to screensaver so can't be feeling that bad. Turns out he hasn't had anymore D+V since 10am but thought he'd better rest up to be on the safe side. The house is a shit tip, yesterday's washing up not done, the laundry has been lingering getting that damp smell in the machine all day, the post hasn't even been picked up. You don't even want to see the state of the toilet he used this morning.

Now, if this was me I would just GET ON with things, if gingerly. Had to cancel having people over because he doesn't feel up to it. Not sure what he expected to have to do towards the evening as I would be preparing food, getting people drinks etc etc but hey.

Is this men and women handling illness differently? Or AIBU?

yabu about guests and washing up... don't want to make others ill, and going ouut is not an option, you never know when things will come back.

yanbu about him cleaning up the toilet.

Oh, just "get on" with it does NOT apply to D+V.

it is very very contagious and you have advised by Health services not to go to work for 24 hours and not to prepare food for others for 3 days. You may be able to just "get on" with it but you could well be passing it on to others who are more vulnerable healthwise.

Yes he could have cleaned the toilet. But YABU about the rest. If I had D and V I would have done the same as your DH. Well perhaps not on an X box but Would sit abs read.

Sorry I think I might have been a bit harsh.

I feel very strongly about this after getting D+V 3 times during my second pregnancy working in an office of people who just got on with it. you literally watched it go round and round the office cos people wouldn't stay off work.

HE DID CLEAN THE FLAMING TOILET!!!!

I've had D&N for the last week (nausea rather than vomiting because I have very little vomit reflex). My poor DP had to look after me for days even though I didn't even have D every day because I just felt so ill I could barely get out of bed. I was too ill to even sit on the sofa and watch a film with my housemates so there's no chance I would have been up to entertaining guests.

I'm afraid I disagree with the consensus on here. If he had a short burst of it at 10am, he should have got a grip and got something useful done later in the day, even if it was just getting the small, simple jobs mentioned in the OP. He may well have felt disgusting, but most of us still have to get on with things. The world doesn't stop turning because he feels ill.

Maybe fair enough about the visitors, but it's a bit off to cancel them at short notice because he was a bit ill earlier. Maybe he should have given them the choice, rather than unilaterally spoilt OP's evening.

I would much much rather someone cancelled at short notice than go to someone's house and end up catching a d and v bug! People who insist on "getting on with things" and merrily spread their bugs around really annoys me. I rarely get d and v bugs but when I do they leave me feeling terrible for days afterwards.

I hardly ever get sickness adn the runs. If I did, I'd feel very sorry for myself and I'd expect to sit around doing very little.

I'm sort of with you as well OP. I can appreciate he didn't feel like going out to the shops or even having people over but if he hadn't been ill since 10 am, then picking the post up and doing a bit of washing up wouldn't have killed him.

D&V is horrible but for most people, the world doesn't stop turning. I had it a couple of weeks ago and still had to run around after 2 young dc's all day.

He should not be on "kitchen" or "cleaning duty" with D&V. Neither should he go to the shops and buy food....

D&V makes you feel totally washed out, and very unwell. Yabu.

Aside from cleaning the toilet, that is.

get a grip he had d v x1 does not make it a bug wasnt to ill to play xbox

Why do you say that tiredgranny? How can you be so sure?

When I have d&v I am rarely sick more than once, but I feel really unwell for many days after. I can possibly just about mumsnet or watch tv

I had D and V over the Easter holidays and I honestly thought like I was dying. The house was a dump and normally I am of the "get on with it" variety but really there was nothing I could do.

OP, you are playing a dangerous game with the gods of vomit here, I am afraid.

Hope you make it through the weekend unaffected!