To think my dog, my rules?

[megapixie]

I live with my DP and our 2 dogs. They are terriers and the one in question is only 4 months old, very small energetic and still being trained. Both dogs are both in my name and ultimately, mine. I had the other when we got together and recently bought the pup. (I paid for her, jabs, micro, food, toys, insurance, leads, treats, everything.)

One of my next door neighbors doesn't like dogs. The other neighbors are fond of my dogs but grandchildren up at the minute and are playing in the garden. These children are absolutely terrified of dogs, especially lively dogs and my DP knows they are up as we spoke to them earlier. Our gardens are divided by a hedge and small fence which needs replacing as she has broken through it and escaped several times now.

I have bought one of those things you screw into the grass and attach a long dog lead onto it for them both so they can still run around plenty in our big garden but cannot escape. This is temp until I can afford a new fence for the hedge.

DP refuses to put them on it. He is playing in the shed with man things and hey presto "MEGAPIX... PUPPY GONE NEXT DOOR COME HELP"

Luckily, it was the neighbors without frightened children round on this occasion and he was able to get her back quickly. I am so sick of knocking on doors and sneaking into gardens to get my bloody dog back because my DP can't be bothered to put her on a lead.

AIBU to tell him to do it because he has no say?

Your dogs, your rules, but your responsibility.
So either lay down the law for your DP, or be responsible for securing your dogs yourself.

yabu to "tell him" what to do, but he is being TOTALLY unreasonable and inconsiderate at not giving a shit about other people's feelings/garden/territory etc etc.
If the dog is out, he should be AT LEAST making damned sure it doesnt go into other people's gardens

Well if it's ultimately your dog isn't it ultimately your responsibility?

Fix the fence? I hate those tethers, that's not how dogs are supposed to play.
I can see it is a short term fix but you really need to get the fence sorted as a priority. How can you let the dogs out for a pee without risking them escaping?

Nice attitude there, ESP as you got the younger dog together?

I sort of feel YABU with the attitude but Nbu in regards to the request? Does that make sense?

My head... Hurts

YANBU. How annoying for you!!! You are being really considerate and sensible.

I know they are both my responsibility. However, I'm just pissed off that he seems to think its unreasonable for me to want him to keep an eye on my dogs when he goes outside and leaves the door open for them to run in and out all the time.

I have taken care to ensure that he knows she is my dog because I'm not having him take her when if we break up. He loves her to bits and treats my other dog like shit in comparison. I just think that as an adult it should be common sense for him to look out for a her when I'm asleep, in the shower etc and they go out for a wee.

I get up at 6 with them most mornings and I don't put her on the lead then and she is well behaved because I pay attention and am training her to come back, do wees on demand ect. He just thinks he can let her out along with older dog and she will be amazingly behaved and not run off without any instruction or anything. I keep telling him and telling him but he won't fucking listen to me!

"When you let her out after a meal or if you see her circling the carpet make sure to tell her "do wees" and keep an eye on her but do not play", "When you cannot pay full attention to her, put her on the long lead thing so she can't fun off into somebody elses garden" He goes "Yeah yeah ofc" next thing she is gone.

It has escalated to a massive argument and he has stormed off for a drive. I am so angry with him.

Not really about the dog, is it?

Your dog, your rules therefore totally and utterly your responsibility to sort the fence out to ensure the dog does not trespass into the neighbours garden.

This poncey lead crap is just nonsense. Get the fence sorted.

"I have taken care to ensure that he knows she is my dog because I'm not having him take her when if we break up."

Um, is this maybe a bigger problem than the dog?

Glad it's not just me thinking that way, vmc28.

treats my other dog like shit in comparison

What you're saying is that once he gets a new toy, he pays scant regard to the old one.

What's he like with his exes?

Andrew, just saw your last comment. We're completely on the money here- the dog is just another reason for an arguement to begin, then an excuse for them to fall out once and for all.
Thank God they're dogs and not kids - what a shit start to life it would have had.