to think Waitrose customers are the least child-friendly on earth?

[adelaofblois]

Over the last few months I've been reprimanded there for 'peddling filth' (telling DS that not everyone had a Mummy and a Daddy, some people had just one of two of both); 'letting kids get under people's feet' (someone stood on DS2 and didn't even say sorry), and for 'treating the supermarket like a playground' (DS was entering my PIN, which he can do on his own, the queue was 1 person long). Tonight DS1 (3) had a tantrum about wanting a bacon bun and some old bat got up, grabbed him and told him he was ruining her cup of tea. Why she thought that would help is totally beyond me, just making my partner (who was with him at the time) feel shite by proxy. Evil bint.

Look, I know some of that sounds over indulgent, and that people always feel strongly about what goes on with kids when out-and-about, but why Waitrose only? Am I just unlucky, or are Lidl, Asda, Tesco, Sainsbury's, Booth's, Morrison's folk just much sodding nicer?

Maybe you just live in a crap judgey area.

People are always nice to me when DD is being an absolute PITA. I would love to shop minus a toddler, but I can't afford delivery charges so tough luck world.

And if it is so awful, why not just go to another shop???

To the poster who said letting you go in front of the queue because your child was kicking off and that waiters take them off for you to eat your meal in peace- WTAF?
It seems parents can be the most self entitled group in society at times!

I remember when DS1 was little I was queueing in the newsagents. He was in the pushchair and talking to me about something or other that he'd seen. Not loudly or obnoxiously just normal talking that any 3 year old does if they have a normal interest in life! The old woman in front turned round, glared and said "in my day children were seen and not heard!" Why? What did she get out of being so miserable? Did children really not talk to their mums in the 1940's. We're always being told how parents talked to their children in the past and how awful we are as mothers and then got at if we don't have them sat in silence being ignored. We also had an incident at a NT place where a grouchbag complained to the management about kids playing. DS1 was among them - he tends to pick up playmates when we go anywhere. I could have understood if it was in the house or clogging up the pathways but they were not running around in the wrong place, they were outside and well away from anyone, in the parkland that goes with such places. Can you really expect them to sit with their hands on their knees during a picnic or is a bit of play to be expected? Some kids are awful but some adults are extremely grouchy and intolerant.

Thing is, I can sort of see how the process works: you're in a queue and the kid is entering the PIN, you don't want to be in the queue, that's unusual, the two make you vexed at the kid. Or you want a curry jar and there's a kid getting it off the shelf. But you're no more actually inconvenienced than if I were doing the pin (same time taken) or getting the jar.

And the tantrum was a PITA, of course it was, and I don't expect anyone to just put up with it. But neither do I expect them to assualt and tackle a child about it rather than my partner, if they really feel it can be stopped somehow.

And mainly why I don't think it's my kids is because when people elsewhere comment it is positive, people actually saying I am doing something right. But in Waitrose, no way (staff are lovely though).

I rarely see any children in our Waitrose, apart from my dd who is always perfectly behaved.

YANBU - in fact I think you must go to my Waitrose. I've always felt that DS gets a frosty reception there, depsite being immaculately behaved and very smiley ( he's 1yo).

And those bloody aisles are too narrow for a pram!

Staff are generally nice though.

We do go to other shops. We go to Waitrose specifically as a treat because its on the way home from Speech therapy and, this evening, cos it's near my partner's work.

But I am genuinely interested in whether there are more 'judgey' places and shops, or whether this is just coincidence.

Never heard of Booths.

Amused at idea that supermarkets should be childfree, along lines of adult-only restaurants. Because getting your weekly shop in is such a rarified activity that it shouldn't be polluted by the stench of children.

We mostly go to waitrose (and do Tesco online shop, just because I haven't set up one with Ocado and probably won't). DS1 is 3 and now on foot, DS2 is in sling. DS1 is generally helpful, sometimes not, in which case his liddle hand is welded to the trolley push-bar beneath mine, and we proceed like that. FWIW, we've never had glares or nasty comments, just a fair amount of positive comments, chucks under chin, etc. Most of the cashiers know us by now and chat to DS1 and give him extra tokens. No probs.

Agree with Pampelmousse re. Gransnet trolls on this thread. Zimmer back off to GN and have a moan about Youf there, please!

Are you Mishy from Morningside?
[Waits to see if Mishy gets obscure ref]

I often shop in Waitrose when I am in England and everyone, staff and customers, is delightful and no-one has ever said anything other than nice, or behaved other than impeccably, towards me and my DD.

On the other hand, I don't make a habit of having loud conversations with DD that might offend old ladies (or anyone else, for that matter) or holding up the checkout queue to amuse my DD.

I agree with icod (christ, haven't typed that for years)

Mind you, back in the midsts of time when dd was a toddler, I shopped in Gateways. As long as you didn't actually shit on the floor in the chilled goods aisle you could behave how you liked.

I like to pick up a few Pot Noodles and other assorted crap when I shop in Waitrose, just to see people's jaw muscles quilt with disapproval when queueing to pay.

OP are you one of those annoying mothers who insist on making every little 'chore' your amazing does in the shop into some singy songy occassion? Ooh look Oscar- this is the way we enter our PIN, enter our PIN enter our PIN, this is the way we enter our PIN in a very busy queue....

Are there any grans on this thread? I'm not a gran.

I am impressed that you talk about deep issues (types of families) in the supermarket. Our dialogue is : 'mum, can i have this?', 'no. too expensive' etc.

Is any chance that you do 'loud parenting and you piss people off?'

Wow we used to shop at Gateway's too! They did these awesome butterscotch sweets at the checkout, they knocked socks off Werther's originals! Also shopped at Finefare, Victor Value, Bejams or Leos! Ahhh happy days!

ffs it doesn't hold up the queue, it takes the same time (it has to, if it took longer it wouldn't work cos the system would log out). And if DS says 'why does everyone have a Mummy or a Daddy?' then I'll say they don't cos it's true they don't. Would you rather I did a heterosexist sex ed talk?

Plus - why take your childen shopping for a pastime?

Order online or go shopping when the kid is in bed.

And PLEASE don't let your child play shops by scanning or entering PIN - it makes 96.6% of shoppers feel murderous

The most sympathetic look I have ever had was from a member of staff at Waitrose. DS was making a fuss about sitting in the trolley so DH pushed and I got DS out and said he could walk with me if he held my hand. He refused and threw himself to the floor. Calmly - DS hold my hand and you can walk. More jelly legs. Hauled up and put firmly in trolley. Member of staff, must have been about 50 or so, clearly remembered such incidents from her time as a mother of young children and gave me a look of such complete understanding.

If anyone else had a cats bum mouth I didn't notice.

Oh sorry i didnt refresh. Bimbo has said this.

Am beginning to see where Waitrose gets some of its grumpy, intolerant customers from...

No probs in my local lidl or aldi, some customers are weird but most are lovely.

Bimbo - careful. They will call us grans

Gateways was the SHITTEST of all the supermarkets. Those who frequent Asda and complain about it don't know yer born

Remember the advert - 'thank GOODNESS for Gateway'

It was 'thank FUCK for Tesco' when they eventually came to town, I tell you.

I don't often post but think that it's a shame the OP is being so hammered. Her children sound normal (and better behaved than my DD, probably). I would want to come onto MN and vent if those things had happened to me. And I would have felt awful (like the OP's DH) if that person had done/said that in a cafe, any cafe.

I hope you don't have any more judgyness heaped upon you and your family OP.

missmogwin. children shouldn't be dragged around supermarkets. the only reason selfish parents feel there is " no alternative" is that they haven't bothered to organise their lives properly or get help. unruly children of selfish parents are a blight on society and they trun what should be a pretty stress -free activity into something extraordinarily irritating by inflicting their disorganisation onto other people's lives.

i don't hold back.it doesn't just happen in supermarkets. i was enjoying a nice cruise on a tourist boat on the Grand Canal in Venice a couple of years ago, and someone's children were being very annoying, chanting, squabbling, whistling,and whining and generally ruining what should have been a lovely experience for everyone on the boat who was drinking in the special atmosphere. of course the kids were bored - Venice isnt interesting for children. But it got so bad i ended up having to tell the parents to "control your children" as they seemed totally oblivious to everyone else's annoyance.

thankfully, they did control their children and i got many approving looks from the other paying passengers.

sometimes parents just don't know/ care when or where it is or isnt appropriate to take children -pure selfishness but sadly a reflection of the society we live in nowadays.