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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this is bonkers

63 replies

BonneKers · 23/08/2011 08:47

Namechanged as I think SIL might be on here.

I slept for an hour last night, due to a combination of the baby refusing to sleep and the toddler waking at 5.

This week, my mum, who we don't see as often as we'd like - lives too far away, is catsitting for my brother and his wife, half an hour away. My mum would love to see the kids, so I phoned her this morning to see if she would come over to play with my toddler so that I can rest a little.

The answer? She'd love to BUT DB has decreed that she can't leave the house for more than an hour or two, in case the cat 'needs' her. Nor is she allowed guests. This is for a whole week. At the end of the week, DB and SIL are picking her up to spend a night away with her (leaving the cat alone).

AIBU to think this is bonkers? I asked my mum if she has any fun cat activities planned. Grin She doesn't know what to do with herself. A whole week of watching a cat. The cat, by the way, is allowed to leave the house for as long as it pleases. Just not her.

OP posts:
Original poster
BonneKers · 23/08/2011 09:14

For real.

I wonder if she's allowed to take the cat out? To a mewseum, for example. Grin

OP posts:
RealityVonCrapp · 23/08/2011 09:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ZacharyQuack · 23/08/2011 09:19

Your mum needs to set up a webcam and shut the cat in the same room. Then DB and SIL can tune in and watch Channel Tiddles all day.

Onemorning · 23/08/2011 09:20

YANBU. Helicopter parenting a cat?

We have an elderly tabby who needs medication for heart disease, epilepsy and arthritis. When we go away a pet sitter goes in twice a day to give him food, meds and cuddles. I am mad about him and miss him when I'm away, but I know he can manage without us for a bit and she'll call the vet etc if necessary. Half the fun of having a cat, for me at least, is knowing that they are independent to some degree.

Original poster
BonneKers · 23/08/2011 09:28

Maybe I'm being a bit harsh. Time to paws for thought... Grin

OP posts:
tigermummy35 · 23/08/2011 09:31

Oh for heavens sakes, stick the bloody cat out in the garden and rebel! They are independent animals ffs.

Original poster
BonneKers · 23/08/2011 09:32

Quite. Ours get a pile of food and a big bowl of water when we go away for the weekend!

OP posts:
BeerTricksPotter · 23/08/2011 09:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mollymole · 23/08/2011 09:54

you mean your DB does not allow you to visit his house ????
perhaps your mum has a secret lover and has him secreted in your brothers house for the week

Original poster
BonneKers · 23/08/2011 09:55

No, we need to give notice of at least a couple of days before visiting DB. He has a few issues.

OP posts:
pictish · 23/08/2011 09:56

Well tbh, your mum is daft for going along with it.

Original poster
BonneKers · 23/08/2011 09:58

Agreed.

OP posts:
MrsAlexanderSkarsgard · 23/08/2011 10:01

Are you sure they only have a normal domestic cat? They haven't managed to get themselves a lion or maybe a little tiger?? I could then understand your poor mum having to watch it 24/7 so it didn't rip their house to shreds . . . .

Perhaps you ought to pop round there with a couple of pounds of rump, just to give her a break . . . . . .

Original poster
BonneKers · 23/08/2011 10:08

Definitely a normal cat, plus we're not allowed to pop round... (a little bit :( really, isn't it?)

OP posts:
ChippyMinton · 23/08/2011 10:09

Tell her to bring the cat with her?

Seriously, though, totally bonkers!

aliceliddell · 23/08/2011 10:09

Couple of tons of arse, more like. Take kids there, come home, sleep.

MrsAlexanderSkarsgard · 23/08/2011 10:12

See, if I knew I wasn't allowed to go to my brother's house (WTF???) and I knew he was away, I would not be able to resist packing up the kids and going round there to spend the day with my mum and The Cat.

Oh and I would be having a proper nosey to find out exactly what he's got to hide (other than being a complete arse!).

stoatie · 23/08/2011 10:24

mad - we just had fortnights hols and my parents catsat - my two cats love this as they get spoilt with foody treats and grooming. However my parents also use it as a holiday and explore the area south of our home (as we live approx 40 minutes south of them. (They also do a grand job of tidying the house with my dad doing simple DIY jobs that appear beyond my OH!)

SenoritaViva · 23/08/2011 10:27

Have they cunningly requested this of your Mum so that she gets SO bored that she cleans their house from top to bottom??? (In which case I have utter respect for them!!)

NestaFiesta · 23/08/2011 10:30

I think your DB and SIL are mad crazy control freaks with maybe some sort of OCD. They need professional help to realise that effectively keeping someone captive for a week and phoning every hour on holiday is far from acceptable behaviour and is extremely selfish towards your mother. Do not enable their craziness further by sticking to their rules.

Tell them "DM couldn't stay in and watch the cat sleeping for 24 hours a day as she needed to get out for some fresh air. You know, like the cat does".

How did the cat end up with more rights than your mother? Stop this right now and get your Mum out of there for a break/visit. She's a bloody prisoner.Don't let your brother do this to you, he has you all doing his bidding and he's not even there.

nokissymum · 23/08/2011 10:34

bonkers if i were your sil, i think i'd know who you are by now Confused

Original poster
BonneKers · 23/08/2011 10:36

Hence the name change, nokissy.

OP posts:
Original poster
BonneKers · 23/08/2011 10:38

No Senorita, SIL is far better a housekeeper than my mum.

OP posts:
thekidsmom · 23/08/2011 10:43

Mad as a box of frogs.

Why havent you just got in the car and gone over there?? If you want to see your mum, you see her. So what that your DB and SIL need notice of a visit - they're not even there!!

Sorry, but it stirkes me that everyone in your family going along with this madness only makes them worse. Lends credence to the 'crazy cat lady' stereotype...

wotabouttheworkers · 23/08/2011 10:43

Sounds like it could be what is probably one of a great many manifestations of control freakery. Phoning very hour? Oh please! Encourage rebellion on the part of your mother, definitely! If that is not possible, drive over there and go have a sleep in one of their beds. Or are they live streaming a video of the house?