to return from holiday without chaos

[EarlyyearsChildcare]

Returned from lovely holiday with dh, dd and parents to find my ds (18) had basically drank his body weight in jeiger and allowed a friend to rewire my living room light. Now sitting in darkness.Keep finding more destruction such as a 'nest'????? made from blankets and tea towels in the conservatory, substance like hair gel but glittery in my shoes and dd's little people sitting in the shower.
The exact happenings are sketchy as ds lost the ability to communicate in anything but grunts at the age of 16.
To make matters even worse, the bloody cats now have an attitude with me as well.
I have spent the day planning punishment.

Finding the little people everywhere is funny.

Sorry for ignorance - what do you mean by Little People? Does your DD own a family of leprechauns/elves/pixies?

FWIW - our DS did/does have parties when we are away - but I doubt he really enjoys them as I reckon he spends most of the time stressing out in case someone breaks something.
Then he makes a cack-handed reasonable attempt to clean up before we get back.

I don't think he's allowed anyone to re-wire anything though - he's pretty intimidating forthright so I doubt anyone would try.

to return from holiday without chaos

When I read that, at first I thought you'd been on holiday with the MN poster called Chaos and left her there.

We left my 17 year old stepdd to have a "girly" weekend in our flat when we went away. STUPID me bought lots of sweeties and juice and rented girly films for them to watch. Came home to find her totally out of it on the floor covered in drink fuelled vomit, she had shagged some fella in MY bed and he had burnt a hole in our sheets with dope ciggies! Then her friend had shagged her fella in our spare room!
NEVER leave teenagers in the house alone!!

OMG queen

Having said that. My parents used to regularly go away from when I was 16yrs and me or my brother never had parties.

We'd have friends around to stay...but then we would even when they weren't on hols. They always came back to a house cleaner than they left as well!

Apart from the rewiring we used to do silly things like that, it's funny when you're young and drunk. I can just imagine all the giggling going on, love it.

TotemPole, Chaos is around and is updating her spreadsheet.

All is well in MNland.

Little people (hybrids of early learning centre, fisherprice etc) My dh has just found one in the bread bin and a donkey (little people sized) in his work boots.
Maybe they are responsible for the goo.
DS turned up with flowers and sheepish expression. I am still trying to be cross so he escaped to gf house.
I have also found 3 further bottles of jeigermeister in the recycling and a picture of what I am hoping is a man with a big nose and a hairy chin drawn on the chalk board in the garden.