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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To to consider taking on a more demanding job when life already feels like a struggle?

8 replies

saffronwblue · 20/08/2011 04:16

I work 3 days a week at a small training consultancy. Good location, pleasant colleagues, OK clients, interesting work. The only problem is that I feel that I am not getting anywhere professionally. My boss, who owns the company, has a very happy busy life with many interests and is increasingly not at work and not up to date with what we are doing. There is no leadership or direction and massive delays on decisions. It would be fine if she would delegate authority but she will not do this, so we are all frequently frustrated. There is no professional development and requests for conference attendance (which we need in our field) are shelved until it is too late. The whole culture of the place is about being "nice" and not raising anything that is difficult.

I have applied for another job at a large corporate and have an interview next week. The position would be 4 days a week, would involve a small amount of international travel and appears as if it would be professionally rewarding and challenging.Much faster pace that what I am doing and much more meaty projects.

My concern is how to manage it all. My DCs are 12 and 9 and go to different schools which are in really difficult locations and require driving in different directions. Mad, but after some false starts they are each in a school which really suits them. DD has had problems this year with anxiety and is quite clingy to me. DH is an academic and has some flexibility but at the moment I feel overwhelmed by our schedules. To add to the mix we each have an ageing mother with health problems and I feel as if my house is always a disaster zone.

So, given this context, would I be insane to take on more pressure with a new job or would the professional satisfaction outweigh the increased chaos?

OP posts:
bakeyouhappy · 20/08/2011 05:00

Driving kids and decluttering vs more satisfying job? I'm going to say take the job. Life will adapt. Set up one day a week (or something) that is mother daughter time so your daughter feels taken care of. Have the whole family pitch in for an hour or so on the weekend to help with the house. I think the kids are old enough to see you as a person, not just mum, and be happy for you to do something that will make you happy. Work out a driving schedule with dh/other parents and go for it. Good luck!

MrsVidic · 20/08/2011 05:37

Do it, you will be less stressed as you will be happier at work. Get a good plan regarding logistics etc

Janeymax · 20/08/2011 05:55

Do it. Get more support with cleaning/babysitting/drop offs to take the pressure off. In my book is money well spent.

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 20/08/2011 06:02

Sounds as if you're stagnating and growing increasingly frustrated in your present job. This combination of negativity can easily spill over into your personal/home life and, slowly, everything becomes too much for you.

If, at interview, the new job lives up to expectations and you get an offer - go for it! It will energise you, and it is a curious anomaly that the more you do, the more you can do.

Spend a weekend or 2 blitzing/decluttering your home, employ a cleaner to keep it under control, and buy in any additional help you need for school runs, child care etc.

puzzlesum · 20/08/2011 06:18

I agree, do it. If it doesn't work out, you've got some useful experience on your CV and you've pushed yourself out of your comfort zone, which is good for your confidence. Life will adapt.

Good luck!

saffronwblue · 20/08/2011 06:51

Thank you all so much for your helpful and consistent responses. For me it is all about the borderline where family ends and I begin. That has been a blurry line for me since becoming a mother.
Izywhizzy I have been stagnating and I have been been taking it out on those around me. And my frustration at work turns into feeling powerless and overwhelmed by home.
I feel all fired up now and it will be a sad irony if I don't get the job!

OP posts:
honeymom · 20/08/2011 06:55

I find this with part time. Sometimes you feel as though your just not giving 100% anywhere and it can leave you frustrated. Get your self a good childminder (that does nights) if you may be requires to do international work. And a cleaner. Or get a nanny if you have room.

sunnydelight · 20/08/2011 07:24

Go for it - if you really want it you will make it work. When you are challenged and happy you generally feel more positive which makes you more effective in all areas of your life.

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