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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think DH doesn't think?!

10 replies

jubblicious · 17/08/2011 22:29

My uncle who I was very close to passed away yesterday. I'm finding it a little hard at the moment

DH went on a work trip yesterday before we found out. He then spent the night getting drunk with 'clients'. I haven't heard from him all day until I text him to see if he was ok.

AIBU to think it was a little disrespectful to be out getting drunk and not to ring me to see how I am?

OP posts:
jubblicious · 17/08/2011 22:48

DH is on his way home from the airport, does anyone have any advice, before i have a go at him?

OP posts:
littletreesmum · 17/08/2011 22:50

This reply has been deleted

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timetosmile · 17/08/2011 22:54

poor you - but don't confuse thoughtlessness with malice, or deliberately not phoning when he knew you were upset,and don't let the fact you are genuinely upset about your uncle influence how hard you lay into DH when he gets home.
Counsel of perfection, I know, and also sorry for your loss x

whattodoo · 17/08/2011 22:54

I'm a bit confused - does your DH know about your Uncle's death?

Presuming he does know, I don't think its disrespectful to get drunk with clients, but I do agree it shows a lack of thought and regard for you not to have called you to call you to chat and ask how you are.

Sorry for your loss.

jubblicious · 17/08/2011 23:00

DH knows that he has passed away. He rang me before he went out for dinner last night and that was the last i heard of him.

I'm upset that he thinks that its fine not to have called all day. My uncle's funeral has been arranged for the day we fly home, so I'm going to miss it. And its been a hard day, knowing that i won't get to see him. And him just getting drunk and enjoying himself, just got me annoyed, when i had the worst night last night

OP posts:
jubblicious · 18/08/2011 02:26

Stupid idiot and every swear word I can't say on here!

OP posts:
EuphemiaMcGonagall · 18/08/2011 06:51

You can say all the swear words you want on here. Go ahead - let it out!

Mitmoo · 18/08/2011 06:55

He may well have had a few because he is upset too, he may also be feeling the loss and that is his way of coping. There wouldn't be much he could do anyway as she is away from home. A little thoughtless not to call but what good would he be slurring down the phone anyway?

MissusCT · 18/08/2011 07:41

I do not see what the problem is. You said he called before he went out for dinner and he is away when it happened and had plans.

I am sure when he is back he will be there for you.

ZillionChocolate · 18/08/2011 07:44

Sorry for your loss. I don't think DH was being particularly unreasonable. He'd spoken to you once, I can understand why he might think that there was no point in another call the same day. Him staying in/not drinking wouldn't have made things much better.

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