to be a little put out by DB and SIL's request?

[KittyWalker]

My children are all older than DB's DS so when DN came along I offered DB and SIL the pick of all my baby things. They took loads high chair, travel cot, all DS's baby clothes - great, both families happy, I have more space they have lots of baby essentials they don't have to go out and buy.

Over the last couple of years as my DS has been growing out of clothes and toys I have always put the good stuff to one side and let SIL take any of it she wants and she regularly does which again is great!

A couple of weeks ago my washing line fell down and my dad offered to cement it in while we were on holiday (kids not around, allow time for the cement to dry without children interfering) which he did and I was extremely grateful. When I got home he said that as he only needed a little bit of cement rather than buy a bag DB had given him a little bit and told my dad to tell me

"don't worry about paying me for it next time you go shopping just by DN a little something"

I was a bit [shocked] tbh but AIBU?

Then maybe a little later I would text:

'Oh that reminds me. When you've chosen which of our gifts pays for the cement, I'll tot up the costs for the remainder. Happy to accept payment in cash, cement or even filler if it's easier for you. xx'

Even ignoring the stuff you've given them I would have thought this was really tight.

Any chance it was a joke?

Bloody he'll it's only a little cement for a line, not to build an entire house. Good idea shouty

shoty your follow up text mad eme like a loon there :)

bollocks, meant shouty obv

It's possible that they see it as doing you a favour taking second hand stuff off your hands.

My SIL did that - she was round my house and I was sorting through stuff including a £150 Monsoon dress I'd worn to a wedding and she sighed and said "I guess I could take it off your hands"'- I laughed and said no, I'd probably get at least 60 quid on eBay for it.

She genuinely thought it was doing me a favour to take it. I got £126 for it on eBay as it was popular.

Love shoutys posts.

youngish the cheek and expectation of some people. Good on you, will now raid wardrobe to find anything of value.

Next time you have a big family get together, ask him loudly how much the little bit of cement he gave you cost him and give him the money. Then ask how ND is getting on with all the stuff you have given her for free over the years, then comment loudly to people around how much money some of your friends make selling stuff like that on ebay.

I am Gor blimey! How hideously mean and ungrateful.YANBU x 1000

Another face here!

I'm afraid that would be the last bag of free stuff they ever got from me.

Grasping at straws here.... you say your DB doesn't usually say things like this. Could it have been said in jest? I often say I'll send you the bill...etc.
Might be worth checking just in case - realise it is a long shot!

As it's family, I would be quite comfortable telling DB exactly why DN wouldn't be getting "a little something"

Shouty Great response!

Give him a pound when you next see the cheeky git and tell him to buy himself something pretty.

I would start quietly donating DC's things to other needier causes from now on too. sounds like you have been taken for granted by your brother.

Ooh I like shouty's text. Is it possible to write out a full invoice for the other stuff not exchanged for the poxy handful of cement?

I would have just laughed in his face and then passed that on as my return message.

I don't know why but that would be my reaction. Even just reading how ridiculous the message was is making me LOL now.

Some people are priceless.

Is your Dad aware that you give them so much stuff already? YADNBU but as you've said yourself, SIL's family are a different kettle of fish. My in-laws are a bit like that - will pay one another for helping out with DIY projects and give each other petrol money for quite trivial (to me) lifts. I have done Orders of Service for 3 family funerals and MIL always insists on paying me to do it which I find totally weird. . She just will not 'take' no for an answer without being mortally offended, so I go with it and make sure it goes towards something for all three of us.

Do what Shouty said!

I would be scaling down their freebies. I agree with someone higher up the thread who said that you have come across one of life's "takers". I recently came across one of these (fortunately not a relative!) - took me a long time to realise that she was just taking all the time and now I am more wary of people.

shoutyhamster!

Start asking for stuff back from them!

ignore it, what's he going to say "re-pay back the cement money" or words to that effect and if so - say "you are kidding with the amount of free stuff your kids get from me?"

Cheeky beggars I USED to give my SIL and DB loads for their 2 girls toys equipment clothes never really saw the clothes much I stopped when I gave them an expensive winter coat for their eldest and found out they had put it straight into a charity shop.I also always remember their birthdays and they have never remembered my children's.

love your responses shouty! I will shortly have to face two sisters (mine) whom I cannot stand at family do, they will comment on how thin or fat I am, whether I am pg or not, how frumpy or slutty I am (you get the idea) can I have you on standby for similar snappy responses ?! btw I am planning to be drop dead gorgeous, have already achieved the "dead" part am dog tired from exercising like a maniac...