Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

to wonder how people with 4+ kids function on a daily basis

100 replies

JessKM · 12/08/2011 11:47

My niece slept last night, shes 5 years old. Ive 'coped' with three children for a while and thought well, her mums ill, one more we'll hardly notice her!!!!!
BOY WAS I WRONG!
At 9am we decided to go swimming...........its 11.47, my son has lost his goggles, my DD1 is running around like a loonie and DD2 and Niece are fast asleep on the rug....neither of whom normally take naps but since it took us two hours to manage a breakfast.................

My head may explode....How do you supermums do it?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

OP posts:

MoominsAreScary · 12/08/2011 13:52

When I was with my ex p we had ages ds1 9 , dsd 6, dss 4 and ds2 2, it was pretty easy but this is probably because they were all a bit older and we only had them full time in the holidays, going out always took some time to get organised! the youngest 3 got on realy well so we only realy had arguments between ds1 and dsd

AlpiniAddict · 12/08/2011 13:52

LiegeAndLief-it definitely helps,as does a bottle glass of wine
I also find it helps not to think about it too much!

Poweredbypepsi · 12/08/2011 13:56

I have 4 6,4,2 and 1 and and 12 weeks pregnant with dc5. I have no idea how we cope but we seem to do ok - only thing is its messy!
we also have strict bedtimes i dont care if they sit on the floor screaing and wailing its bedtime thats it. So we get grown up time from 7pm everynight which helps.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 12/08/2011 13:56

That makes sense, wfrances.

Still rather you than me though I think

AlpiniAddict · 12/08/2011 13:58

youngwoman-my house is messy too. It's unbelievable the amount of shit toys we've accumulated over the years!

carpetlover · 12/08/2011 13:59

We have No4 due next month. I found going from 1 to 2 the hardest. Going from 2 to 3 was barely noticable but I'm now getting nervous about having 4! Mine will be 7, 5, 3 and new. The 5yr old is the hardest by far. She only seems to need about 6hours sleep which isn't much at her age. DD2 is a strict 7-7, 12hours a day girl and DS also needs his sleep.
So I think it depends on the child. Two of DD1 would probably kill me whereas I could cope with six of DD2 quite easily.

Poweredbypepsi · 12/08/2011 14:00

those with 4 or more how do you get throgh washing? i have no dryer as it blew up during the great sickness bug of 2011 and so im finding it hard to get through washing in the bad weather - my pile is HUGE

bandgeek · 12/08/2011 14:01

I would love a large family, but spaced out a bit (there is an 11 month gap between my dc and now they are 5 and 6 I'm starting to think about trying for a 3rd ) I know a few people who have got 4+ and I am in awe of them. I suppose you would cope though, because you have no other choice but to cope!

Pawsnclaws · 12/08/2011 14:02

I would love no.4 (actually have had four but only three now, so I think I'll always feel three isn't quite right in some way).

The owner of ds2's nursery has 10. They're a wonderful family, they all pitch in and I've never (admittedly from the outside) seen any resentment. Her sister has 13.

AlpiniAddict · 12/08/2011 14:07

Poweredbypepsi-luckily I've got a good dryer(although you have to stick a bit of cardboard in to make it work everytime!). I don't wash every day,it depends how I'm feeling. Again we just muddle through somehow :)

bandgeek-that's exactly it,you cope because you have to,even if you feel like falling apart. I have days where I can't do anything other than feed and tend to my DC,but thats another story.

aquashiv · 12/08/2011 14:09

I have three and find them easier to manage than one. Though that is my limit.

kitya · 12/08/2011 14:18

The orthodox Jewish mums amaze me. I see them with a minimum of six children, just about a year appart. The women always look immaculate, they never raise their voices!! The children are always well behaved. They never have a scrap. I wonder if it's anything to do with them not watching telly?

PenguinPatter · 12/08/2011 14:27

Poweredbypepsi I struggled with three DC and the washing - just bought a 9 kg washing machine with www.appliancesonline.co.uk/default.aspx .

Down to one wash a day - have a washing line in the garage which isn't great in winter but rest of year helps.

We do have a drier though - try to use just for emergencies.

I've had friends with ceiling driers - likes these:

www.pulleymaid.com/classic_clothes_airer.htm
www.notonthehighstreet.com/gardentrading/product/sheila_maid_ceiling_clothes_dryer#utm_source=google-product&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=google_product_search

I find Autumn and spring hardest times of year to get the washing dry - radiators aren't on but it to wet and cold to dry outside.

We'd have had four if DH hadn't had a bad accident - after that nether of us was broody any more and as youngest gets older it get easier to do things with them all so wouldn't want to go back to babies again.

4madboys · 12/08/2011 14:27

i do a load a day generally and i have two clothes horses and a tumble dryer, i NEED a dryer! get all the washing out on the line or clothes horse when its dry, even if its not a warm day i get it outside for a bit and then tumble if i have to.

keeping up with the clothes washing is fine its just all the bedding, beds get changed on different days, couldnt do them all on one day and the boys strip their own beds, and eldest makes his own bed, the younger ones i make.

and yes it does feel like a conveyor belt of preparing, making up and clearing up of food quite often!

4madboys · 12/08/2011 14:28

and i have a 9kg washing machine as well!

whenIgetto3 · 12/08/2011 14:33

Poweredbypepsi - I have just instigated a new washing regime in my house, each DC has a small flexi tub in their chosen colour, they put their dirty washing in it and bring it down to the laundry at the end of the day, I then wash it, put it in tumble dryer go to bed, then in morning I take it out put it back in their tubs they take it up and put it away then put dirty washing back in. Just into the second week of this and it is working great for us, am beginning to think may give DH his own tub too The bedding is what gets me, it has to be washed and dried in a day to be put back on the bed or it takes over, they strip their beds and bring it down, each DC has a different day that their bed gets washed on, all written on a nice white board with the list of what each DC has to do each day (mainly read book, tidy toys, brush teeth etc). They do do chores but not too many and they like the fact that they get paid for them

Poweredbypepsi · 12/08/2011 14:34

those clothes dryers look really useful!
I am jealous of your 9kg machine btw - mines only 6 sob. Im saving my pennies to buy a new one

Poweredbypepsi · 12/08/2011 14:37

whenIgetto3 your whiteboard sounds like a really good idea my children currently dont really have chores to do, I am starting to feel like the older ones at least should (6 and 4 years old).

D0G · 12/08/2011 14:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Poweredbypepsi · 12/08/2011 14:40

DOG your children are exactly the same ages as mine. I agree about people saying how busy they are with one I think "doing what?" but then i remember when i just had one i did feel busy just in a more relaxed way

whenIgetto3 · 12/08/2011 14:41

Poweredbypepsi - the only thing that is hard is making up chores for the younger on (4) she obviously can't do all the things the 10 yr old can but feels left out if she doesn't have the same amount of chores

Peachy · 12/08/2011 14:44

I have 4 kids because I chose to; not having twins I had the chance to experience 3 after all and think I could manage more! I don't, however, think I could cope with 5- four is great but when one is ill I am at my limit: all of mine have some level of SN (between severe ASD - borderline dyspraxia / ADD) and - well- I worked in a residential home for LD for years now it feels like I run one!

Well not quite but a lot I learned comes in handy!

I am from a family of 3 kids, DH 2, Dad from a family of 16 kids though.

In no way a supermum: ecuated (used to work for aprenting charity, studying ASD now) but same as everyone else. Why did I want so many kids? two always seemed too small a family for us, not sure why, and there was no way I'd ahve 3 after having been the odd one out of 3 girls.

kickingking · 12/08/2011 14:45

I have no idea.

Someone in my extended family has 4, with 18 month gaps between each so at one point had 4 under 5 . Their house was very messy, they were late for everything, they forgot things....I used to judge them and think "well, how hard can it be? She's at home all day..."

Then I had a child. One child. Now I am amazed they managed as well as they did.

Peachy · 12/08/2011 14:50

Oh all are boys

aged 3, 8, 10, 11

and when I had two I had a demanding (emotionally mainly) career so I was far more stressed then. Indeed, I do have a can't-sit-still-and-relax side to me that may well explain the 'why' aspect!.

And YY to a large washer! No dishwasher though: Dh does that.

I have whiteboards, routines posted everywhere: they are all at different schools- juniors, nursery school, SN primary, SN comp- so a routine is a must. As is an enormous sense of adventure, dry SOH and a Dh / Dp willing to muck in! We happen to ahve a family friendly hobby which helps, and as the boys age they join us in performing, although ds3 can't.

Fuzzywuzzywozabear · 12/08/2011 14:52

ooh whenIgetto3 love the laundry idea! We use the flexi tubs to sort all of our underwear into! everyone has their own colour and they have to take up the tub and put it all away - it works for us!

Flip

1 2 3 4