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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this a bit mean?

13 replies

Melly20MummyToPoppy · 11/08/2011 12:20

It's my little sisters birthday tomorrow, she will be 5. Had a text off my step mum this morning saying that her birthday is now on sunday as she is working and doesn't want to miss out on all the fun. By the sounds of the text she means literally her whole birthday has been moved! No cards or presents tomorrow at all! I don't know if that is the case, but if it is, isn't that a bit mean?

OP posts:
Original poster
Melly20MummyToPoppy · 11/08/2011 12:21

Sorry it's meant to say 'this is a bit mean?'

OP posts:
VelveteenRabbit · 11/08/2011 12:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SoupDragon · 11/08/2011 12:23

No, it seems practical.
It's not like it's being cancelled or put back a month.

SoupDragon · 11/08/2011 12:23

And, by your own admission, you actually have no idea what was meant at all.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 11/08/2011 12:25

No, I am sure she would rather spend her b/day with her mum

Original poster
Melly20MummyToPoppy · 11/08/2011 12:25

She knows exactly when it is. Which is why i think it's a bit mean. If she didn't know when it's meant to be then i wouldn't be bothered by it really.

OP posts:
Takitezee · 11/08/2011 12:25

Not at all mean if your sister is ok with it. She's not cancelling her birthday just having on a day where it will be more fun for her.

Flisspaps · 11/08/2011 12:26

I feel :( for your sister - 5 is old enough to know when her birthday actually is.

If your mum is working, what will your sister be doing? Perhaps whoever is looking after her will celebrate in some way instead?

piprabbit · 11/08/2011 12:27

I've done that with small children who have only a vague idea of the date - just shifted the whole day back a little.

I've also done a minimal celebration on the day itself and saved the big celebration for a later date - DD was fine as she understood that she was in fact getting to enjoy her birthday over several days.

It all depends on the child's understanding of both dates and what it planned. It would only be mean if the child was expecting presents on Friday, didn't realise that the celebrations had been delayed and then got very upset. If the child is oblivious to the fact that Friday is actually their birthday OR is happy to delay things and have an extra special day on the weekend, then I don't see a problem.

Original poster
Melly20MummyToPoppy · 11/08/2011 12:41

She'll be with my dad. I just think that at 5, you're old enough to know when it is, but not old enough to understand why it should be moved. Or am i underestimating her? I can't remember much about being 5 to be honest!

OP posts:
ElbowFan · 11/08/2011 12:55

You could always do what you were intending to do and say 'text? what text?' if anything is said.

piprabbit · 11/08/2011 13:00

I'd talk to your step mum or dad about the exact arrangements if it is worrying you.

Chances are that your dad will make a fuss over your DSis on the big day and then everyone else will make another big fuss of her on the weekend - she'll be spoilt rotten and have a wonderful time.

DeWe · 11/08/2011 13:09

Don't think it would bother any of my children (age 10, 7 or 4) as long as they got a birthday day as they wanted it. I think they'd rather move the day than have me working and not with them.
After all the queen has an official birthday, I'm sure putting it like that would appeal to a lot of small girls.

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