to think that you shouldn't take your partner's car, if they can't drive yours?

[kickingking]

A small issue, but I want to know if I am being unreasonable.

For most of our relationship, I didn't drive. DH had a car and did all the driving. I struggled to pass my test and then finally passed in an automatic.

For a short while, we shared an automatic car. Then it because necessary to run two cars due to us working in totally different locations, so DH had buy another car. He bought a manual, which obviously I can't drive.

He seems to be finding excuses to take the automatic car instead of his car. The other week, he rang me up and asked me to come home from my mum's house because he wanted to take the automatic to a sports thing with some friends. I asked why he couldn't take his car and he said it was because the other car has a bigger boot and they had equipment to transport. Then he asked to take the automatic car to work because his was making a funny noise.

Just now he left to go to a meeting. He rang me and said he'd forgotten something and could I go out to the road as he drove past and give to him. He was in the automatic car. I said "Why have you taken my car?" and he was all "Oh, it's YOUR car, is it? I thought it was the family car as we can both drive it". I pointed out that it was ridiculous to take the only car I can drive when there is another one available to him. He said "OK, fair enough" and drove off

This is really pissing me off. I know this is because he has found he actually prefers driving an automatic, but he won't admit it because he was slightly scathing about me choosing to take my test in one instead of keeping trying with a manual.

AIBU to think he should rive hos own damn car?

Yes, we did get it from a dealer.

I don't know if I can see him going for that idea. Might be like admitting I was right when I said that automatics are nice to drive? Or that my uncle was right when he said once you've driven an auto, you won't want to go back?

i really dont see the problem

you aren't using the car - so he is using the car.

this is a non issue

yeah and now she has no choice to use the car even if she did want to!
PLUS, seeing as he didn't ask if he could take it, he had no idea if she was planning on going out

AND HE HAS HIS OWN CAR HE COULD USE.

Mine used to do that, I wasn't insured on work van (our own - not a company one) but he wanted to go fishing with is brother (who had a car and a wife who DIDN'T drive -- but he would take my f*cking car and leave me stranded!
I am now on the insurance for both vehicles we own.
The other day, he wanted to use "mine" as it's more economical and faster, I made him leave me his key (spare ones battery has failed) - and he was aghast. Wanted to know where I was going - I said I don't have anything planned, but on the other hand, I don't want to be stranded!!
(we have one bus an hour up til 7pm and live about 5 miles from nearest town)

YANBU

he should be more considerate. My dh drives my car quite often, but he would never take it if I needed it. I am able to drive his car, but I much prefer to drive mine.

I think you should learn to drive a manual.

Well, I can see your point Custardo as I wasn't using it. It did piss me off that he didn't even ask or tell me though. I could have decided to pop out to get some milk or DS could have needed to go to A&E and I would have got outside to discover the car gone.

PuppyMonkey I agree it's made things a bit awkward, but believe me - I tried . DH and I are both glad I'm driving at all as it was difficult managing two workplaces and childcare with just one driver.

He doesn't know if OP is going to need the car, because he didn't ask. What if they had been out of food and she was planning to do a supermarket run?

I actually had a carless panic yesterday, DH had taken it to visit friends 300 miles away (we agreed, that was fine) but I cut myself badly on some glass in the kitchen and there was a few minutes of "oh crap, is this ambulance worthy, because if it isn't, it's an hour of walking and buses to get to A&E, in my pyjamas, with a baby on my hip! We would have got by (with a £15 taxi I expect) but faced with this sort of situation, and the manual car sitting idly in the drive, OP shouldn't have to.

How would you feel about taking your manual test?

You obs been driving a while now, so you may find it a lot easier now as you have learnt to drive properly since the test. You only need to learn how to gear change

Sounds like a bit of a shite excuse to me. Me and dh have been in thecae business for a while and I've had to swap between manual and automatic and I'm fine. Why not just say he prefers an automatic, it's perfectly valid.
YANBU to be pisses off. He is purposefully taking the only car you can drive-that's downright selfish. Me and dh are a 2 car family (normally-we only have one this week due to him selling his and not going to pick up his old banger new car until Saturday) but I'm only insured to drive mine whereas he's insured for both. There would be he'll to pay if he took mine for no reason and left me stranded at home looking at his car knowing I can't drive the fucker.

"DH and I are both glad I'm driving at all as it was difficult managing two workplaces and childcare with just one driver."

But when he takes the automatic, you are back in that exact situation, since if the only car available to you is a manual, you are effectively a non-driver.

Hide the keys. Force him to ask nicely. Don't always say yes.

Keep the keys on a string around your neck.

YANBU

YADNBU - he is leaving you stranded, and effectively rendering the possession of the other car pointless - he's not driving it, you can't - why have it? Cars are like underwear imo - you havew your own and you ask, nicely, before borrowing your other halfs.