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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Would you leave a child alone late at night in a caravan camp club?

30 replies

worraliberty · 06/08/2011 20:33

And if so, at what age would you leave them?

I've just endured enjoyed a week by the sea at a UK caravan site. On site was the usual camp club, where entertainment up until 10pm was aimed mainly at children...with the Reps singing and dancing their hearts out with the kids, so the parents could drink in peace relax

Anyway, on 2 out of the 7 nights we were there, the compares who did the entertainment aimed more at adults/older families...called children up on stage as part of their act. When they asked the kids (who were totally unrelated) "Where are your grown ups?" the kids said they weren't with anyone as they'd gone back to their caravans.

The first child was about 7yrs old and the second about 9 or 10yrs old. Bearing in mind a lot of adults do tend to drink a lot of alcohol on holiday...and the club hires big burly security guards/bouncers from Thursday to Sunday (busiest period) I was a bit shocked that anyone would leave their child alone at night in a place like that

So AIBU or do you think this is 'normal' and some parents see the Reps as baby sitters, despite the fact they're working and not there to be responsible for the kids?

OP posts:

BrigadeOfLannisters · 06/08/2011 20:37

My Mum's brother has a caravan on a well-known holiday site. I can't prove anything but for that reason alone I would never recommend anyone leaving their DC unattended

PumpkinBones · 06/08/2011 20:38

I love these holidays

I'm really surprised there were children there without adults, the whole point of those bars is to stay out late and drink while the kids get entertained, not sit in a chilly caravan with crappy tv reception surely?! I'd be inclined to think they meant they'd just popped back to get something, but as it happened more than once maybe not...if they actually had gone, I wouldn't be too shocked about the 9/10 year olds, but I wouldn't leave a 7 year old there.

EuphemiaMcGonagall · 06/08/2011 20:38

How do you know they were alone? They might have been with an older sibling/cousin/aunt/uncle/grandparent.

pjmama · 06/08/2011 20:39

No I don't think that's normal. I think it's irresponsible.

The fact that the compare asked where their adults were suggests to me that it wasn't a "leave your kids with us" type session. Unless said adults had just popped back to their caravans to get something (which I still think is a bit , I'd have been pretty disgusted too. Were these kids supposed to make their own way home when they were done?!

Mitmoo · 06/08/2011 20:39

I hope their surnames didn't start with Mc.

No way do you leave 7 year olds in clubs at that time of night or day for that matter.

LadyWithNoManors · 06/08/2011 20:40

YANBU. If this does happen it's totally irresponsible of the parents.
Unfortunately some people can't be arsed to look after their own kids.

BlueArmyGirl · 06/08/2011 20:40

I wouldn't leave mine. In fact, when we do a holiday like that I don't use the activity clubs either. Whilst I like time without my kids, spending a week on holiday and farming them off to the play club all day seems pointless to me. I am not averse to them doing activity clubs or activity days but I would access these near home. On holiday we're there to explore together, IMO anyway.

ohnoudidnt · 06/08/2011 20:41

I would never leave my dc at that age.Very wrong imo.Maybe when they are teenagers ? but even then, I would still want them in my view.

squeakytoy · 06/08/2011 20:41

I am fairly sure it is illegal to leave children unattended on licensed premises.

nojustificationneeded · 06/08/2011 20:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

frasersmummy · 06/08/2011 20:43

I dont think its right but I guess if you are an owner you and your kids may know the staff well and know that there other owners their who will make sure they are ok

doesnt make it right though

timidviper · 06/08/2011 20:44

Some people seem to think it's ok to behave in a totally irresponsible manner on holiday as long as it siuts them (the parents that is)

You would think after a high profile missing child on holiday case in recent years they would have more sense but it seems not.

PonceyMcPonce · 06/08/2011 20:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

youarekidding · 06/08/2011 20:48

YANBU. We have as a family been to a site like this camping and caravanning. Actually generations have been going for 50 years! Our adults always stay with the children, who often fall asleep on chairs, but the kids are helicoptered within the club, but I have noticed loads of children in the park, jumping the wall and running by the pool, left at the car totally unsupervised from about 5yo.

I have just come back from a caravan site, not a really large and noisy one. There was nightly entertainment, 6-8pm for children and then until 11pm was family, including bingo. Actually there was a lot of bingo. The park is outside and arcade (v small) attached. Our 3dc's aged 6 and 7 went outside with the 12 yo when it was light. They were checked every 5 minutes. The 12yo was allowed to stay in resort bar the night dc's went to bed at 10pm but had to be back by 11pm. She had a friend in then, who we had met the mum, and the friend was walked home after.

Original poster

worraliberty · 06/08/2011 21:05

Sorry, the quickest way to guarantee someone will knock at the door is to start at thread

Yes, they were definitely alone without adults and no matter how well the adults know the staff, the staff were rushed off their feet. What with the lovely weather it was packed to the rafters most nights.

I think (though I don't know) kids can be left without adults during the daytime clubs...but then they would have a list of exactly who is there and who is picking them up.

OP posts:

WillowFae · 08/08/2011 00:16

No, I wouldn't. I remember the case of Leonie Keeting in the 1980s who was taken from a caravan at a holiday park and murdered.

I know, these things are rare, but why take the risk?

MadamDeathstare · 08/08/2011 01:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

halcyondays · 08/08/2011 07:26

The point is the staff are NOT there to supervise, MadamD. We are not talking about a supervised activity, we're talking about the evening entertainment. There are staff who are there to entertain and there are security staff but they are not babysitters. It's made quite clear at these places that you need to supervise your children up to a certain age at all times. If it is somewhere like Haven there are no supervised clubs for younger children, parents are supposed to stay with them at all times. Older children can be left at some of the daytime activities I think, but I don't think they should be left during the evening in a busy bar.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 08/08/2011 07:34

No way, but then I have a very odd approach to parenting according to general feeling on here at the moment. I pretty much feel that you don't leave small children on their own in order to do something better.

rookiemater · 08/08/2011 09:01

YANBU, huge difference between older children enjoying some independence during the day by participating in activities and leaving them in the dark with a bunch of drunken adults and then openly advertising that they are not being supervised.

I think the caravan sites make it clear that they are not offering child minding service as this has strict requirements in UK for ratios and training, what they offer is entertainment only.

It is amazing that bad things don't happen more often at the sites, I suppose if nothing else it demonstrates the reality that 99.9% of the population are decent normal people who wouldn't harm children.

farnywarny · 08/08/2011 11:51

What I find hardest is the fact that because times have changed so much, this is seen as irresponsible now. When I was a child it would not have been out of the ordinary at all

spiderpig8 · 08/08/2011 11:59

apart from anything else, i'd have thought they'd have had difficulty finding their own caravan again inthe dark - i do!

bananasplitz · 08/08/2011 12:01

What I find hardest is the fact that because times have changed so much, this is seen as irresponsible now. When I was a child it would not have been out of the ordinary at all

yes i thought that as well and tried to answer why it was ok then but not now. have things changed so much - are there so many more perverts/child snatchers now than there were in the 70s and 80s. Not sure about that

cheekeymonkey · 08/08/2011 12:14

I believe that there are the same amount of perverts around but thanks to the internet they are better organised, informed and are able to fool themselves that their behaviour is acceptable as they have contact with other sick pervs.
This is why the things I could do as a child will never be experienced by my child

EdithWeston · 08/08/2011 12:22

If it was adult-style entertainment, which I would not let my children go to unattended (whatever time of day).

I would let my children go unattended to "non-supervised" family events once secondary school age, and only then if they went together (and I was sure I could rely on them to stay together).

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