to feel even more offended by catcalls when I'm pregnant?

[GirlWithTheMouseyHair]

This is totally a rant, I personally am under no delusion I ANBU.

I hate the catcalls, wolf whistles and lewd remarks I get walking down the street by men up ladders, in cars, just walking along and hate hearing them made at other women too. I get embarassed by the very occasional "lovely smile" or whatever but so angry at the number of times I hear "get your tits out" or "lucky saddle" when cycling. Usually I go red and carry on walking or whatever.

Now however I'm 6months pregnant, and most of the time I catch a man about to say something or looking at me in that way, then they see the bump, THEY go red and look the other way. However some men just don't, and have even had "wish I'd put that in you" shouted at me. I just don't get how men think it's acceptable to talk to a bloody pregnant woman that way!

And this is not a "I'm so pretty, all the men catcall me" post, more often then not I look like a right dog's dinner when I get these comments. And hate to say it, but it's usually white van men too.

[revolutionscoop]

I actually remember the first time this happened to me; a man in a van leaned out and shouted something leery about my (virtually non-existent) 'tits' - I was 11 years old. The thought of my innocent little dd's being subjected to that just makes me feel ill

[RitaMorgan]

You're right Whatmeworry - it's just the inevitable downside of being a woman. Men can't help themselves, they have to intimidate and humiliate women, but at least it means we're pretty!

They only thing worse than men shouting vulgar comments about our breasts is not having anyone shout at you :( For that means you are old and ugly and therefore not worthy of the male attention (any attention) we desperately crave.

[2old2beamum]

now an OAP I wish it was me---however I would suggest an appointment at the opticians

[spookshowangel]

have to say that woman are known to make lewd and crude remarks at men in the street not a week ago i saw 3 women shouting at a guy saying "come here sweet thing i know exactly what to do with that thing, bring that thing over here.
they thought it was hilarious he seemed embarrassed.

[BulletWithAName]

maresedotes- I know what you meant

It's disgraceful isn't it, I bet most of them probably have wives or girlfriends at home as well

[GirlWithTheMouseyHair]

and that's pretty awful too spook, just because it's women doing it to men, doesn't make it any less offensive or humiliating

[GirlWithTheMouseyHair]

IS ti worse to be subjected to it when you're pregnant though? I just thought maybe it would be more of a moral barrier...and as mentioned it sometimes is, but also sometimes isn't. Had this with the last pregnancy too but had blithely forgotten about it

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

I personally don't think it's flattering. Mitmoo is entitled to feel as she does but I think it's pretty sad really. The type of blokes that do this are, in my opnion, ones that you wouldn't let within ten feet of you, generally unappealing, lacking self-esteem themselves and just horribly rank.

I don't think the men that do this are fussy anyway, I think it's about them trying to 'fit in' to a persona that they really can't pull off. They just leer at anything and it's really not flattering, I don't think so anyway. Urghh.

[PeterSpanswick]

I think it's more of a bullying tactic than a sexual come-on when you're pregnant as you're more obviously vulnerable and less likely to defend yourself, maybe? Some men feel protective towards vulnerable women, others feel contemptuous and like to exploit the fact. Definitely a power trip on their part ime.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

Oops, posted too soon.

Meant to say, GirlwithMousseyHair, I don't mean it that you aren't a lovely woman, just that these horrible men are no barometer of whether a woman is attractive or not, they're just unwholesome and unworthy.

[BulletWithAName]

IS ti worse to be subjected to it when you're pregnant though?

It is, and I think it's equally as bad to say it in front of impressionable children. It's not acceptable in any circumstance really though is it?

[GirlWithTheMouseyHair]

no don't worry LyingWitch, I completely agree with you

[BulletWithAName]

I don't think the men that do this are fussy anyway, I think it's about them trying to 'fit in' to a persona that they really can't pull off. They just leer at anything and it's really not flattering, I don't think so anyway. Urghh.

I totally agree with this, I don't really think it even matters what you look like at all with these men.

[Feminine]

I seriously thought that when out with the buggy I would then be immune from it...
NOT so, pushing DS 15 months ,a man leaned out of the cab of his lorry and yelled "If you ever want another one love!" [shocked]

I have to be really honest though , I don't really care when I get it ...I don't think its cool ,but it doesn't wind me up

I feel sorry for those that don't like it though , I imagine it can be very intimidating at times...

[BulletWithAName]

seriously thought that when out with the buggy I would then be immune from it...

Ha, I made this mistake too!

[GirlWithTheMouseyHair]

have to say I probably come across as more angry about it, which I am, but my foremost feelings are those of humiliation and intimidation

[Mrsxstitch]

Try and focus on what a failure with women they must be if they feel the need for such immature, pathetic behaviour.

[rosepie]

Vile behaviour - I'm another that has had a catcall when pushing a pram.

However, what shocks me is that women posters condone sexual harassment. Now that is really shocking

[maresedotes]

That's the reaction they want GirlWithTheMouseyHair, for you to be humiliated and embarrassed. It makes them feel good.

[Empusa]

Urgh, the idea that anyone should be flattered by that shit!

Seriously these things are flattering

• someone taking an interest in you and engaging with you
  
• someone giving you a compliment
  
• someone treating you like you are special
  

These thing aren't

• yelling sexual comments at a stranger
  
• in fact just yelling at a stranger
  
• making someone feel intimidated/embarrassed
  

No one she have to feel "grateful" for that kind of attention!

[lastonetoleaveturnoutthelights]

These comments are ever intended to be a compliment or flattering.

They are intended to be a clear display of power balance, to humiliate and intimidate the 'weaker sex'. Is it a coincidence that most of these comments are made from an elevated or empowered position when the woman is physically lower (ie scaffolding, a building site, a van window, two or more men in a group).

Anyone of the opinion that such comments are 'flattering' is highly naive and clearly ignorant of what true flattery or compliments actually sound like.

[lastonetoleaveturnoutthelights]

ever should read never, sorry.

[GirlWithTheMouseyHair]

I know marsesdotes which makes me even more humiliated! Am just not quick enough to think up something on the spot, especially if they're whizzing past in a van

[strawberry17]

A couple of years ago, a man came up to me at the checkout in Asda and said something like "I just want to tell you I think you look really lovley", smiled and walked off, so much nicer than the experiences on this thread but I was still and