To be feeling really bitter about DH causing me constant broken sleep?

[BigFishTinyFish]

For as long as I can remember DH has always got out of bed at least twice during the night to go to the toilet, sometimes as much as 4 times. I'm a light sleeper so ALWAYS wake up when he does but he doesn't even TRY to be quiet. The other night for instance I woke up when he got out of bed, drifted straight back to sleep and then was awoken 5 minutes later by him rummaging around in the bedroom for an asthma inhaler as he "felt a bit wheezy". One time I was startled and woke up to hear him saying "oh for fucks sake", I asked what he was doing and he said "looking for my phone". This was something like 4am in the morning (he uses the phone as an alarm clock). I drifted off back to sleep and then the bedroom light went on so he could continue looking for the bloody thing. Its every night. For the past year I have suffered constant broken sleep because of him.
Last week he worked nights and I had the first night of unbroken sleep in years. I felt amazing the next day and realised what I'd been missing out on for so long. The whole week went by where I actually looked forward to going to bed and felt great upon waking.
Last night was the first night we were back in the same bed. We went to bed at 11pm. He woke me up at 12.15 by knocking his glass off the bedside table - followed by lots of loud whinging and moaning from him that the bedside tables were too high for the bed. I drifted off back to sleep and was awoken again at 2am by him going to the toilet. I drifted off back to sleep and was awoken again at 4am by him saying very loudly "WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?? DID YOU HEAR IT?" so I said "No, I was woken up by you, again." so he said "well I can't help it if I can hear something, can I." I drifted off back to sleep until he shouted "THERE!! DID YOU HEAR IT??" so at this point out of sheer frustration I shouted "NO JUST SHUT UP! OTHER PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO SLEEP! SHUT UP!" so he shouted "DONT SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT!" so I shouted back "FOR FUCKS SAKE, LET ME SLEEP, PLEASE!" so he slung the covers off and went storming downstairs. I drifted off back to sleep eventually only to be woken up again by him getting back in bed and saying "must've been a cat outside or something".

This morning I overslept. Missed the bin men, feel like shit and have been snapping at the DCs all day because I am so tired. I know this is wrong but last night I could honestly see myself getting violent with him. It irritates me and annoys me much I just want to hit him. I can't sleep on the sofa as I have a bad back and we have no spare beds.

I refuse to stay at my mother's house because both she and my brother are like this, not as bad as your DH though so you have my deepest sympathy. You need to kick him into the spare room/sofa until he learns how to be considerate. It sounds like he's an insomniac so it may be worth his while going to see his GP. If he drinks less after 9pm then he shouldn't need to use the toilet 2-3 times during the night.

He sounds terribly 'needy' to be honest.

x post with fluffy

Erm. I suspect my DH could write a very similar OP to this. I get up at least once a night for the loo, and I wander about/chat. Not on purpose, I hasten to add, but I've always done it. DH claims that he either sleeps through it or can now answer me in his sleep when I say such weirdness as 'Did you change the wing?'. So he might not necessarily be trying to drive you bat shit.

I think its a Man Thing. They always seem to go to sleep in about two seconds, never get disturbed, so assume that we are the same. It takes me about an hour to get to sleep, and the slightest thing disturbs me. For years, Mr Gherkins would come to bed about three o clock, immediately start to snore loudly until 7am - I would wake up with palpitations with the lack of sleep night after night. Ear plugs were my saviour - but dont waste money on foam or wax ones, they re rubbish. Get some Bio Ears or the Boots equivalent, they are brilliant and cut out almost all the noise. And an eye mask for when they switch on the light, or start playing on their phone/laptop.

Dunno about a torch amicissima, I'd be seriously thinking about a remote controlled electric shock collar if it was my DH

A bit of fear conditioning would work wonders.

Get a separate duvet at the very least so the covers aren't pulled when he gets out. Agree with everyone about eye mask and ear defenders. And sleep separately if you can, even part of the time. Not sleeping is horrid and he's making it worse.

I got myself some custom made ear-plugs from a hearing centre.

There could be a man drilling a hole in my bedroom floor and I still wouldn't hear him.

They cost £100

I sleep well every night of my life now.

Leave the bastard!
sorry couldn't resist

YANBU, it sounds terrible. He must also be pretty knackered all of the time as he isn't getting unbroken sleep, but perhaps he doesn't need it like you do.

SmugMarried where??? Where is this wondrous hearing centre??