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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Home alone?

42 replies

NorfolkBroad · 26/07/2011 08:31

When do you think it is ok to leave your child home alone for say 15 -20 mins while you pop to the corner shop?

OP posts:

littlebrownmouse · 26/07/2011 11:10

I've just started leaving DS (8 and extremely sensible) while I take DD to dance class. He's alone for about 20 minutes. A couple of his friends (9 and very sensible) walk home from school, let themselves in and have a 20 minute wait for their parents to come home.

Morloth · 26/07/2011 11:10

I leave DS1 (7) on his own at home for 10-15 minutes sometimes.

But I am not in the UK so there isn't the same sort of fear around children.

Birdsgottafly · 26/07/2011 11:14

It depends on the child.

My middle DD could be left at 7/8, the others were later.

It depends on the support network around them also, as in what would they do/who could they call on in a crisis/where you live etc.

sleepindogz · 26/07/2011 11:14

mine are 25 and i feel uneasy leaving them home alone

lol

kaluki · 26/07/2011 11:25

I leave ds1 (11) home alone while I pop to the shops.
With ds2 (8) I wouldn't dare!! I would come home to a pile of ashes!!!

RitaMorgan · 26/07/2011 11:34

8ish as a general rule, but depends on the child.

If they are going to be expected to get themselves to and from school safely at 11, then I do think they need to be gradually introduced to greater independence before that rather than chucking them into the deep end at secondary school.

housemum · 26/07/2011 11:52

My mum used to let me walk home from school age 8, and I may have been alone for a bit as my nan wouldnt always be in then. I hated it, was absolutely terrified on my own. However, if I suggested leaving 8yo DD2 alone while I got some milk mum would freak, despite the fact that she's more confident than I ever was and she knows almost everyone in our close - work that one out! Personally, I'd not leave her till she's about 10, probably more from how I felt at that age than any concern about her ability to stay put and know not to answer the door etc

legspinner · 26/07/2011 11:59

9 for my DTs (walking to school by themselves and being left for short periods). DD2 is 8, so perhaps next year, but she's not quite as responsible as the older two at the same age.

jendot · 26/07/2011 13:12

Ds 7 and ds 9 (nearly 10)

I leave ds 9 for up to an hour alone (not allowed to answer door...has my mob number and knows neighbours really well) He also walks himself home from school (3mins, no roads)

Ds 7 I will leave alone for up to about 10 mins and with brother for up to about 20mins

Snack cupboard gets raided as soon as my back is turned...but think kids 'thinking' they have got away with something 'naughty' isn't always a bad thing

DrCoconut · 26/07/2011 14:46

I started in yr 6 as I knew that after school club would end in yr 7 and he would need to be OK staying at home for short times after school. He will start yr 8 in September and so far is fine. Until I went on maternity with DS2 he let himself in for an hour twice a week and he stays home when we go to the supermarket. I have my mobile and he knows he can also ring his grandma who lives in the same town or go to a friend down the road in an emergency.

slightlyunbalanced · 26/07/2011 16:41

www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/womanshour/02/2009_50_mon.shtml

Birdsgottafly · 26/07/2011 17:04

The NSPCC has to present the general ideal, but what happens in RL is quite different and individually right.

redexpat · 26/07/2011 17:16

My mum used to leave me aged 3 because she could get to the butcher and back within an episode of Super Ted knowing that I wouldn't move from in front of the tv!

Avantia · 26/07/2011 17:21

My Ds are nearly 11 and 9 .

I have been leaving them whilst I run about for a while - as long as Tv is one and they have access to their DS they never move !

they know how to use the phone to get hold of me.

has anyone brought up the scenerio ' what if you have a car accident ? ' yet

notso · 26/07/2011 17:29

I was allowed to walk to and from school and play out alone from four, but wasn't allowed to be home alone until I was 13.
I have left DD for 15-20 mins from 9. She has been allowed to walk to the shop (end of the road) from age 6, DS1 is nearly 7 and can go to the shop with DD (provided they have been getting along well enough) but not by himself.
Have recently let DD (11) walk to the park alone, about 1 min away but one really bad road to cross, I hold my breath until she texts me to say she is there.

LineRunner · 26/07/2011 17:40

I think it's safer to leave them when they're 10 than when they're 16.

10 years olds will watch tv or play games, have a drink of water from the tap and get a biscuit out of the tin.

16 year old will set fire to their beds with hair straighteners, mess with your PC and leave the house unlocked while go and spend all their money on scratchcards.

LineRunner · 26/07/2011 17:41

The NSPCC is on a planet called 'Barking'.

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