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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To want to cry?

44 replies

DontCallMePeanut · 25/07/2011 19:01

DS has just pissed on me. I wish I was joking. I was sat on the armchair, and he's come over, sat on my lap and pissed on me. Deliberately. WTF? Am I really that despisable as a mother he feels the need to do that? I told him to get on the potty, and ended up shouting at him. Probably not the best approach, but I have no idea why he's done it.

I could actually cry, I feel that disgusted at him. :(

OP posts:

HeidiKat · 25/07/2011 19:22

YAB a bit U, all part of being a parent, I have been peed, pooed and puked on loads of times and many more to come I imagine.

JamieAgain · 25/07/2011 19:24

He might actually be a bit worried about you, if you are feeling rubbish and he can't understand why. Children do funny things hen they are confused/worried

DeWe · 25/07/2011 19:26

Dd2 one time when she'd been trained for about 6 months, came downstairs, took her pants down sat on the floor and did a wee. When I said in no uncertain terms that I was unimpressed she looked sweetly at me and said, "but I was doing it in my pretend potty."
I let her know that I expected only pretend wees in pretend potties. She still struggles with her imagination running away with her age 7.

JamieAgain · 25/07/2011 19:26

What I meant by that is - they sometimes do things to provoke a reaction, if you are not behaving normally.

Sorry about the migraine - they are horrible.

shrinkingnora · 25/07/2011 19:56

A little story to cheer you up:

When DS1 was being potty trained at 3 (running around with no bottoms on) a (childless and always will be) friend came to visit. She was sat with one leg crossed over the other and he walked up to her and very gently rested his penis on her bare foot. It takes them a while to learn what is and isn't ok....

And most people would have shouted 'oi get on the potty' when being peed on.

Pandemoniaa · 25/07/2011 20:03

One unforgettable day when DSS1 was about 3.5 (and "home and dry" on the potty training front) he was sat on DP's shoulders while DP had a conversation with a friend in town. About 2 minutes in, DP felt his neck turn ominously warm and sure enough, DSS had pissed on him. When asked why, DSS just said that he'd been getting a bit bored. There have been consequences, however, since this story is still doing the rounds and DSS is now 32!

Fluffeh · 25/07/2011 20:14

I think your allowed to be a bit angry but maybe at the situation and the migraine more than your DS. If that's the worst he's ever done while potty training your blooming lucky :D.
My cousin when potty training always hated pooing on it. So much so that she would hide in a corner and do it there in secret and we would find it later. One day aged around 3.5 she was sat on my uncles knee and just poo'd on him. He went crazy and she laughed in his face. Be thankful its only wee :D.

Original poster

DontCallMePeanut · 25/07/2011 20:18

Ohh, the worst he did was when he pooped on the oven door... I scrubbed it daily for a week, and reverted to using the mini oven until I felt it may be safe...

Put him to bed, had a cuddle, and I apologised for shouting. His answer "is your head better now, mummy?"

Thanks for the little tales. Reassuring to know he doesn't hate me this is normal.

OP posts:

sixkids · 25/07/2011 20:33

You should never shout at a child for an accident,my ds is 7 and still wets the bed every night,you need to calm down if you think its deliberate at that tender age.

joric · 25/07/2011 20:40

As others have said, he's only 3 and only been in pants for a few weeks. I doubt he did it deliberately but does need to say sorry after he has been told that you didn't like (!) being weed on!!!

BTW, when I first read your thread, I misread it and read DH instead of DS!!! Your reaction ( mad as hell) went with DH and I was just about to tell you to get out of there!!! :) as it's your 3 year old and not DH -YABU !!

Original poster

DontCallMePeanut · 25/07/2011 20:40

Must be hard being the perfect parent...

OP posts:

Original poster

DontCallMePeanut · 25/07/2011 20:43

xposted with Joric

I know, and I do feel bad for shouting at him. :(

OP posts:

sixkids · 25/07/2011 20:48

Hey we all overreact sometimes,nobodys perfect,not even me! hes only young though so maybe you can deal with it better next time if it happens again :)

Loonytoonie · 25/07/2011 20:52

I'm not telling you this to make you feel worse OP, god knows I've yelled at my LO's when I shouldn't have but this happened to me twice in the month following my middle child's 'dryness'. It was suggested to me by someone I regard as wise and experienced, that when my DD climbed into my lap, she physically 'relaxed' and this included her newly trained bladder from relaxing too. The things is, we never know they do this when their nappies are on so it could be a recurring pattern they follow. I saw it from a different angle when I realised it could be this. Just a suggestion?

DoMeDon · 25/07/2011 20:53

There is nothing wrong with occassionally losing your cool - you are a person too and DC do benefit from learning that. OK - you over reacted, it wasn't a slight against you, but it's not nice to be p'd on (especially with a migraine)

He will not be traumatised by it- shouting is damaging if it's on going not one off. He now knows that p'ing on someone is not acceptable and I doubt he will do it again.

Glad you're both feeling better after your hug

Original poster

DontCallMePeanut · 25/07/2011 20:54

Loony, that makes a lot of sense. TY for putting it like that :)

OP posts:

bellavita · 25/07/2011 20:59

Oh bless him. I think you expected too much tbh. DS2 wet the bed just about every night until he was about 7 and then the last time he was 9. He couldn't help it. No matter how many times we lifted him when he was little to go to the toilet before we went to bed, he got into such a deep sleep he couldn't wake up to go the toilet.

Just start afresh tomorrow.

joric · 25/07/2011 20:59

Don't feel bad for shouting peanut! I have gone mad over far less- it's the shock! :) You don't expect to be there one min. having a cuddle and the next soaked in wee!!! Now if he were my DD's age 7... I might be v. Worried!! :)

joric · 25/07/2011 21:02

I must start reading these threads properly! Sorry I called you peanut!! (dontcallmepeanut) :o

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