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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ew Ew EW EWW!!!

112 replies

fluffyanimal · 19/07/2011 09:00

Last night I had a really weird dream about having an endoscopy (i have never had one in real life). It was quite vivid, I could feel the scope going down my throat which was a bit unpleasant but bearable. Then the doctors left me alone and I started to gag and try to bring up the tube.

Then I woke up and I still had the feeling of having a foreign body in my throat. I drank some water but it didn't really go away. it felt like when you accidentally swallow something that you haven't chewed properly.

AIBU to think I've probably swallowed a spider in my sleep?

OP posts:
Bizkit · 19/07/2011 16:59

My throat feels funny

BabyDubsEverywhere · 19/07/2011 17:13

Okay,
Im happy with the bumsex threads, and the compare the worst swear word threads, i can be serious if i need to, but always up for a joke, i have no issue with mumsnetters having swear words in their posting names....
but....
but....people please for the love of god - If you must talk about eating insects and spiders and slugs could you please put it in your title...

I WILL HAVE NIGHTMARES FOR MONTHS AFTER THIS THREAD (you fuckers)

HuntForGalaxyHazelnut · 19/07/2011 17:13

I am traumatised by this thread! Especially the asthmatic earwig and the cockroach in the yoghurt!

I'm going to ask my grandma to knit me a balaclava without a mouth hole for me to sleep in so no spiders can get into my mouth! Actually i wont need eyeholes either if it's just for sleeping, so just some kind of big sock would do....

ChunkyMonkeyMother · 19/07/2011 18:20

OMG Flumpalot - That picture is GROSS!

highhopes2010 · 19/07/2011 18:32

well when I was a teenager I woke up from a drunken sleep in the middle of the night and made myself a vimpto without the kitchen light on. I was gulping it down and thought why the hell is this drink bitty? Anyway the next morning I came downstairs and found the side with the vimpto on crawling...no ...heaving with ants and there was lots in the bottle of vimpto as my brother had left the lid off it before I had got to it! NICE!

soverylucky · 19/07/2011 18:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

highhopes2010 · 19/07/2011 18:37

Another drunken sleep and another trip down to the kitchen but this time I saw the whipped squirty cream on the side and decided to have a few squirts but nothing came out except end of bottle liquid and air. Didnt taste very nice either.got up the next morning with a slightly swollen tongue?and ready to have a go at my brother for always eating things before me and saw the bottle on the side-which actually turned out to be suede cleaner for shoes!

highhopes2010 · 19/07/2011 18:41

Another drunken sleep as a teenager and woke up to a nice can of coke at the side of me.drank some and swallowed the cig dimp my bf had put in it earlier! Now realise why I dont drink any more!

UpsyDozy · 19/07/2011 18:47

I used to work abroad and woke up one night as a lizard ran across my face. I could feel the little feet pattering across my cheek!

It was the cockroaches that used to bother me the most. I had to check all round the room when I turned the light on and you'd see all these little fuckers scatter under the wardrobe. Clearly that's when I rarely went to bed sober....

BootyMum · 19/07/2011 18:51

Oh, this is a thread about insects...

I thought from the OP that fluffyanimal's DH, ahem, had himself a little BJ action on the sly whilst she was asleep.

I mean, it could have been that rather than a spider, couldn't it?

Sorry if the thought of that is just as unpalatable.

But I just wonder OP, did your DH have a big smile on his face when you woke up this morning?

ButWhyIsTheGinGone · 19/07/2011 20:34

I once took off my bra at bed-time to find a perfectly-pressed and most decidedly flattened-out ENORMOUS spider. Have no recollection of it falling in there but I slept very uneasily that night :-(

Thingumy · 19/07/2011 20:40

Dh woke up in the early hours a few nights back as a tickling sensation on his mouth had woke him up,he thought it might of been my hair (gets everywhere) but alas it was not,it was a hairy bastard spider and I presume it was the same fucking massive spider he tried to kill with one of my pumps a few nights previous...

It's still not been caught yet,maybe it has finally been eaten by one of us?

bottleofwineandastrawplease · 19/07/2011 20:48

Haven't finished reading the whole of the thread yet, but when my DS was about 9mths he ate a spider.

He was crawling across the living room, spider ran past, as it did so he picked it up and popped it in his mouth, and then carried on crawling along on his merry way.

Didn't seem bothered and I presume that he ate the damn thing as I didn't see him spit it out.

Original poster
fluffyanimal · 20/07/2011 08:26

BootyMum LOL no, it wasn't DH as I'm quite sure I'd worn him out before going to bed Blush

OP posts:
hairfullofsnakes · 20/07/2011 08:35

Brainhurts... That is one of the scariest things I have ever read. I am
Taping my mouth shut before bed

I feel quite sick!

mandalee · 22/07/2011 18:12

ShirleyKnot - just saw this thread on the roundup (congrats you lot, BTW, for having THE most revolting thread on MN this week!) Had to tell you that my husband had the EXACT same thing happen to him with an earwig in his inhaler!! The little fuckers shits insects must have a thing for the inhaler powder...

And in case you're wondering, he hasn't gotten over it yet either. You have my commiserations.

Maat · 22/07/2011 18:22

I am going to find a wedding veil to wear when I am asleep.

catinboots · 22/07/2011 18:28

I had a mouse run up my trouser leg once. I shit you not.

And I am not a cartoon character. I am a real person.

Alibabaandthe80nappies · 22/07/2011 18:35

Oh my fucking God. I am going to sew shut my own mouth, which will have the added benefit of helping me to lose weight.

< faints>

Chocolateporridge · 24/07/2011 21:17

One night in a very run down Edinburgh B&B I had my DH searching high and low for a HUMUNGOUS spider that ran past the bed when i was about to get in. He tried valiantly to find it but gave up in the end and I had a fitfull sleep until he went to the loo in the night and freaked out when he realised he'd been in bed with a large squashed spider stuck to the sole of his foot

boak Wink

glitterkitty · 24/07/2011 21:35

I was sitting upstairs on a really bloody hot bus and felt my hair rickling my neck, went to brush it away ind it was a massive cricket CLINGING TO MY SWEATY NECK Shock i did awful spasmy neck scraping dance that probably amused a few ppl.

I have had the earwig in inhaler before too, but luckily had tapped it and it fell out.

And one eve I was cleaning my teeth- I drank from the tap and swished, and spat out a load of silverfish BOAK BOAK BOAK

babybarrister · 24/07/2011 21:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

youarekidding · 24/07/2011 21:54

Urrrggghhhh. That is my worst nightmare and I'm sure I'll have them again tonight.

Seems though its is possible to swallow a spider.

tethersend · 24/07/2011 21:59

Not me, but an ex colleague. Stlll makes me shudder...

One night, she woke up thirsty and took a massive swig from the glass of water by her bed. She says she felt it unfurl in her mouth.

She pulled it out of her mouth and flung it against the wall. It made a thud.

I keep a bottle of water with a lid on by my bed now.

CocoPopsAddict · 24/07/2011 22:06

Oh my god, you are all horrible. I keep feeling my hair tickling me and keep having to check it's not a spider. Bloody hell.

Ok, one time my sister and I were staying in a hotel and I woke up at night, switched lamp on and saw a massive spider on the ceiling. Couldn't sleep and had to make my sister get it down. We were in another country so we hoped it wasn't poisonous! Only way she could do it was by throwing a towel to knock it down as the ceiling was so high.

When she went to check the towel, the spider was rolling around on its back like a woodlouse turned the wrong way up, waving all its legs around.

Christ, I feel sick thinking of it.